How To Masturbate With Pictures
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How To Masturbate With Pictures
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If you haven’t changed things up since seventh grade, read this.
Most people with a penis learn to masturbate as quickly and quietly as possible. After all, when you're a testosterone-loaded adolescent, you have to content with the very real risk of your parents or siblings walking in and disturbing your, ah, personal time.
And there isn’t just a fear of getting caught jerking off—there’s also a lot of shame surrounding sexual pleasure when people are younger, says Dr. Uchenna “UC” Ossai, Pelvic PT, certified sexuality counselor and founder of YouSeeLogic , an online sexual education platform. “Few people were told that masturbating is natural and an excellent way to learn more about your sexual pleasure,” she says.
Those secretive, fast-and-furious masturbation habits can spill into adulthood, Shamyra Howard, sexologist and Men's Health advisory panel member, says in Men's Health Best. Sex. Ever . "Many guys are masturbating the same way they did when they were teens—all rushed," she says. "You need to change things up. If you're right-handed, use your left hand; involve sex toys; or try masturbating on your stomach. Also, don't focus only on your genitals. You have a whole body. Get your nipples, perineum, and anus involved."
The options might sound a little overwhelming. If you're sitting there thinking, I'll just go back to my old ways, thanks —WAIT! According to Howard, exploring new ways to masturbate can help benefit your sex life on the whole.
"As long as you're switching things up when you masturbate, you get an opportunity to explore and try different things with your body and to learn what you like," she says. "You can learn how you like your penis touched, which things turn you on, and which angles lead to more pleasure."
Try these 13 masturbation tips and techniques the next time you feel like getting down with yourself, and get ready to feel good— really good.
You’ve likely masturbated in the same position now for years, so try switching it up. “If you are a stander, try laying on your back. If you like to sit, stand up,” Dr. UC. says. “Changing positioning can improve your pelvic floor muscle resting tone, which can help improve the blood flow to your penis.” So changing up your masturbation positions won’t only feel good for the novelty, but it may also increase the strength of your erections.
Do you ever feel really horny after working out? Well, there’s a reason for that . You release hormones while working out, including adrenaline and dopamine a.k.a. the so-called "feel-good" chemical. Dr. UC adds that it’s excellent to masturbate after working out “because your endorphins are quite high, blood flow is great, and your pelvic floor muscles are completely relaxed.”
"The perineum is the area between the penis and the anus. It's full of nerve endings and very sensitive, so providing some vibration to it can often feel really good," says LELO Sexpert and NYU professor of Human Sexuality Dr. Zhana Vrangalova .
Try pressing a vibrating sex toy to your perineum while stroking your penis with your other hand. Vrangalova recommends either the LELO Lily 2 or the LELO Smart Wand . It's "sure to provide a different kind of orgasm," she says. There are also prostate massagers on the market that stimulate your perineum.
Sex toys aren't just for people with a vulva. For penis-owners, Emily Morse, a sex expert and host of the popular podcast Sex with Emily, recommends the Fleshlight, the popular handheld column that you slip over your junk to simulate the feel of real vaginal or anal sex . (You can even buy an accessory to free up both your hands.)
Vibrators have traditionally been marketed to people with a vulva, which makes sense, given that most need some form of external clitoral stimulation in order to climax during penetrative sex. But recent years have seen an increase in vibrating sex toys designed for dicks , because honestly, those vibrations can feel really damn good on penises, too! One 2012 study found that 44% of heterosexual men had enjoyed the experience of using a vibrator at some point in their life, so don't be shy about trying some of these toys.
"A lot of men, especially those who identify as straight, regularly miss out on a huge source of pleasure: their butts," Vrangalova says. "Butts (of all genders) have a huge number of nerve endings and stimulating them can feel really good. If you have a prostate that you can (indirectly) reach this way, that anal stimulation can be literally mind-blowing."
So how do you bring a little butt play into your next masturbation session? Vrangalova recommends using your hand or a prostate massage toy .
She recommends the LOKI Wave , which "has a nice long handle you can hold with one hand while you stroke with the other, and the wave motion of the internal vibrating part hits the prostate just right."
A cock ring—also known as a penis ring —is a band and that goes around the base of your penis (and sometimes your testicles, too), trapping blood flow in your shaft and thereby strengthening your erection. Cock rings often come up in conversations about how to last longer during partnered sex, but there's no reason not to reap their rock-hard benefits during solo sex. Speaking of benefits: In addition to stronger erections, some guys anecdotally say that cock rings give them stronger orgasms.
Ever heard of the " death grip "? If you find yourself having a hard time reaching orgasm during sex with a partner, it might be because you're squeezing your penis too hard and stroking too fast during masturbation.
"This amount of grip pressure and stroke speed cannot typically be reached with a partner, hence their orgasmic difficulties," Vrangalova says. "To prevent this from happening, make sure you switch up the grip and stroking speed, so you're used to ejaculating in different ways."
The 5-minute speed jerk is fine for most days. But if you have a little extra time, “ edging ”—also called the stop-and-start method—can help you achieve more intense orgasms, Morse promises.
Work yourself right up to the edge of ejaculation and then take a short break—just enough time for your erection to soften a bit. Then start the process over again. Do this three or four times before you orgasm , and you’ll experience more profound, powerful ejaculations, Morse says.
You’ve probably tried incorporating your non-dominant hand into your solo act. You may have even attempted the mythical “Stranger”—sitting on your hand until it falls asleep, and then using it to simulate the sensation of someone else doing the dirty work. But Morse advises using your opposite hand in more creative ways.
Turn your hand so it slides down your penis forefinger-first, and twist it as you stroke. You could also try holding your penis against your stomach with one hand while rapidly sliding a few fingers up and down the underside of your shaft. Like switching positions during sex, mixing in unfamiliar hand maneuvers can break up the tedium, Morse says.
There are nearly as many sex-specific nerve endings in your testicles as there are in your penis. Don’t neglect them, Morse urges.
While individual preferences and sensitivities play a big role in what you’ll enjoy, a lot of men discover an untapped source of stimulation—and more intense orgasms—by pulling down on their testicles rhythmically before ejaculation.
Some guys learn to ignore their penis entirely as they approach the big O, Morse says.
Masturbation entails sexually pleasuring yourself, but it does not mean you have to do it alone in a room with the door locked. Masturbation side-by-side with a partner can be an intimate experience—not to mention an easy, sexy option for when you're both too tired to do anything fancy. "Sex is so much more than penetration," Howard says. "Sex is any type of emotional, spiritual, physical, or erotic connection, and that includes mutual masturbation."
Plus, watching how your partner touches their own body can be a great way to learn exactly what they like in bed, and vice versa.
We know it sounds counterintuitive, but the less you obsess about climaxing, the more enjoyable your sexual experience is likely to be . In our race to have an orgasm, we often end up overlooking the most important aspect of a sexual experience: pleasure. If you have time on your hands, do what feels good —not what you think will get you over the finish line fastest.
"Most people masturbate because they want that release, but allow yourself to focus on the moment of intimacy between you and yourself," Howard says.
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We can all use a little bit of extra self-care and TLC. One of the easiest and most satisfying way to give back to yourself is free and easy to do at home. That’s right: masturbation is one of the most satisfying ways to unwind , relax and treat yourself to a quiet (or not so quiet) night in. And even if you’re a seasoned pro at playing a solo sex concerto, there’s always new ways to jazz up your technique and change up your me-time. Plus, May is Masturbation month — so it’s a particularly great time to celebrate.
Not only is masturbation fun, good for you and super convenient, it can actually perk up your sex life all around: “ Women who masturbate are more likely to have orgasms during partnered sex, and we believe that this finding is related to an increase in comfort and knowledge with regard to her body,” says Jessica O’Reilly, Ph.D., author of The Little Book of Kink . “By experimenting with different positions, you can discover new pathways to orgasm and stave off the sexual ruts that arise due to repetition and monotony.”
This all totally makes sense when you think about the lasting benefits of getting to know your body and what exactly will get you off in any given situation: You’re way more empowered to take control of your pleasure, whether you’re on your own or with a partner , breaking in a new sex toy or making use of your shower head or something else around the house . You also have the knowledge that you totally can control what makes you feel good and give it to yourself just-because.
Interested in changing up or elevating your solo play? Read on for a few of our favorite toe-curling masturbation positions and give yourself the gift of a good orgasm.
A version of this story was published January 2014.
How you do it: Start by lying on the bed on your stomach, using a pillow or two to support your stomach and hips. Use your hands or a toy (or both!) between your body and the pillow to rev things up.
Why it’s awesome: “ The pillows angle your hips up, which opens up new sensations . It also uses the tension of your leg muscles, which can feel very different for you,” Katz says.
How you do it: Sit on a chair that doesn’t have arms, like a dining room or folding chair. Tuck your feet and ankles around the chair legs, leaving your legs open.
Why it’s awesome: “ It provides much more access to all of the delicious bits between your legs, and when you climax, you can brace your legs against the chair legs. By exposing more parts of your vulva, you will experience some new — and sometimes even more intense — sensations than you usually do,” Katz says.
How you do it: In the shower , place one foot on the side of the tub or shower seat, allowing full open access to your vulva. (If you don’t have anything to prop your foot on, simply lean back against a wall and move one knee to the side.) Use your fingers or use the removable showerhead stream to tease, or pick up your favorite water-resistant vibrator for guaranteed orgasms. Or rotate among all three!
Why it’s awesome: “Masturbating while standing is an awesome position style that too many women ignore,” says Sadie Allison, Ph.D., author of Tickle Your Fancy: A Woman’s Guide to Self-Pleasure . “The Leg Shaver not only gives you great access to your vulva and vagina, but it also lends itself to a little leg and core muscle toning, as you need to work a little harder to keep your body weight vertical. This, in turn, naturally flexes your pelvic floor muscles, offering more sensation to the ‘feel-good’ nerves in your genitals’ erectile tissue.”
How you do it: Begin on your knees on the bed, or another soft and comfy surface, with your upper body upright. Gently open your knees to a position that feels comfortable for you. Supporting yourself with one arm, you can lean back or lean forward to hold onto a headboard or the wall.
Why it’s awesome: “Because you can modify this in so many ways — changing angles, using multiple toys for penetration and/or external stimulation — you can discover new spots and new things that get your motor going. Leaning forward and back can provide new sensations, and it allows you to open up the rest of your body for exploration and play with your fingers, toys, even nipple clamps. Experiment and have fun,” Katz says.
How you do it: Lie on your stomach and grind your pelvic bone and clitoris against a hand or a vibrating toy beneath you.
Why it’s awesome: “The weight of your body adds extra friction against the hood of your clitoris, and the back-and-forth grinding strokes the shaft of your clitoris as it becomes erect,” O’Reilly says.
How you do it: Keeping your knees wide open, kneel on the floor or the bed. Use this position to press and ride a firm surface beneath you, like a toy, the mattress, a pillow or your hand.
Why it’s awesome: “You can rock back and forth, slide forward and backward, or roll the hips in a circular fashion according to your own preferences,” O’Reilly says. “In this position, the extra blood flow to your pelvic region can help with both arousal and orgasm.”
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