How To Have Video Sex

How To Have Video Sex
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Now that we’re a few weeks into COVID-19-related quarantine, things are starting to get a lil boring. Baking bread and endlessly scrolling through TikTok have lost their thrill, and even masturbating to pass the time is starting to get old (*gasp*). Basically, people want actual connection, stat.
And considering it’s definitely not a good idea to hook up with someone you’re not social distancing with right now , what’s a horny person to do? One word: cybersex. Tons of singles (or couples in unintentional LDRs thanks to the coronavirus ) are heading to FaceTime, Zoom, and Skype to fulfill their ~needs~. And honestly, it’s kinda genius. Thank you, modern technology.
But because Zoombombing , hackers, and revenge porn exist, it’s not as simple as just opening an app and getting down to business. In the infamous words of Taylor Swift, this is why we can’t have nice things. So you should def be taking some precautions before getting off via video chat.
Here, eight tips that’ll keep you safe while having *special* video calls with your S.O. (or, hell, even a Tinder match).
The “soccergirlxo” password you’ve been using for all your accounts since the sixth grade isn’t gonna cut it, says Jessy Irwin , cybersecurity adviser and information security expert. Instead, you need strong, unique passwords for each of your logins to make sure that attackers can’t gain access to your accounts (especially the one you use for hooking up, duh).
Can’t remember the last time you updated your computer? Get on that ASAP. “That’s going to be the way that you protect your computer and you protect yourself from potential viruses or security vulnerabilities,” says Irwin. In other words, updates protect you from shady people gaining access to things you don’t want them to see—like your naked bod in front of your webcam.
The same goes for your phone. Keeping up with software updates ensures that you’ll get the latest security fixes on your device—which means less opportunities for it to be hacked.
If the video-chat platform you want to use requires an email to sign up (and a lot of ’em do), Irwin suggests creating an anonymous email. “It might be worth making it so that you have an anonymous email that you only use for this purpose. That way, any evidence of this behavior doesn’t accidentally pop up in your inbox or get moved into the rest of your day-to-day life,” she explains.
Basically, having an account that’s not tied to your name will offer a bit of protection if images or videos from your chats somehow get leaked.
If you really wanna be safe from potential security breaches, Irwin and Joseph Jerome , privacy and cybersecurity expert, agree that your best option is to use an encrypted video-chat platform. “The lack of encryption creates a scenario where unnamed third parties can eavesdrop or listen in on what you’re doing,” explains Jerome. (This is why people have been Zoombombed.) Both he and Irwin recommend an encrypted app called Signal that offers end-to-end encryption, which means your call will be wrapped in super-strong protection. “It’s very hard to break and it makes sure that what’s being shared is only for your eyes and your partner’s eyes. And that’s it, there’s no one in the middle,” Irwin explains.
FWIW, FaceTime is also end-to-end encrypted, if you’d rather go that route. Good to know!
This means not settling for the defaults, people. “I can’t convey this strongly enough: When it comes to things like privacy and security, settings absolutely do matter,” says Jerome. Read over those long-ass agreements and make sure you’re not secretly giving the company all your data or that it now has legal use of anything it records. (Aka your nudes.)
If you’re okay with some risk, Skype, Google Hangouts, and Zoom are fine to use, says Jerome. They all offer about the same level of security, which is moderate but not incredible.
Just pick a platform that you don’t use for anything else, warns Irwin. If you already use Zoom for happy hour and remote yoga classes, you don’t want to use it for sex too and risk having a friend or family member drop in unexpectedly.
And whatever you do, definitely don’t use your work Zoom, Skype, or Google Hangouts account for intimate calls. DUH.
Just like you’d have a conversation with your partner about contraception before the main event, you should talk about what you two are gonna do in terms of cyber protection, says Irwin. Ask what their privacy settings are and if they plan to record or screenshot the call. This way, you can have a legit convo to see if you’re both okay with what you decide.
“It’s easier to have bad things happen to you on your computer rather than just your mobile phone,” says Irwin. That’s because mobile devices are designed to be a little more secure, so they’re less susceptible to bad software that could put you at risk.
“There’s a long history of people creating viruses and extremely bad software for your computer that basically hijacks your web camera and waits until you might be sitting in front of your computer in a bra or without a top on or something like that,” she explains. And that’s definitely not something you want to be worrying about during sexy Skype.
That means not showing your face but also things like tattoos, piercings, and even freckles that might let people know it’s you if the contents of your video chat get leaked for some reason. Things you might not think of, like your manicure, could make you identifiable, says Irwin.
The same goes for your background. Make sure there’s nothing in the frame that makes it clear that this is your house or bedroom. When in doubt, use a virtual background , suggests Jerome. (Who wouldn’t wanna get it on lying on a tropical beach or underneath a waterfall?)

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It *is* possible to do it and not cringe the F out.
We're all spending more time at home these days, and with literally every basic task you can think of able to be done over the internet. You can shop online, work from home , speak to friends and yes, you guessed it, even have sex . If you're living apart from your partner, or in a long-distance relationship , Skype sex and video chat sex can be a great way to maintain your connection, even across thousands of miles.
The idea of trying to be sexy IRL can so scary for some people (*raises hand*) that the very thought of it sends them into panic mode. Factor in a phone screen or laptop, and that panic is heightened by approx 100 times. Like it or not though, it's a Skype sex world we're living in now. I've even been told that some couples actually enjoy it.
If, like me, just imagining dropping trow, talking sexy while also looking hot and dealing with a crappy wifi connection (so many things to consider) breaks you out in a cold sweat here's how to do Skype sex the right way. Sex and relationship expert Annabelle Knight, who also has her own range of sex toys with Lovehoney , says there are six ways to make sure you have legit good Skype sex.
"Skype/video/phone sex can be an absolutely amazing element to any couple’s sex life, but lots of couples miss out because they don’t want to get it wrong," she says. "Well, fear not because below are my top tips for getting it right."
Fist things first, you need to set the date. Choose a time when you're both free, and make sure you set aside enough time so that you won't need to finish abruptly or be interrupted. There are fewer things worse than being half way through depicting sexy scenarios with your housemate banging on the door and asking to borrow your new top. Oh and on that note, maybe invest in a lock for your door too.
Make sure that the time you choose is suitable for both of you, if that means having to wait a while then be patient. The wait will only make the release even sweeter.
Once you’ve set the date it’s really important to make sure you’re ready. Zooming in from work and stopping yourself midway through will do nothing for your Skype sex session. My advice is to take some time beforehand to ‘prep.’ Do whatever gets you in the mood, whether that's a candle-lit bubble bath, a glass of wine, reading some erotic fiction or listening to some audio porn . Do whatever it is that makes you feel sexy.
It’s a good idea to make an effort with your appearance, not for their benefit, but for your own. Feeling like you look amazing gives you the emotional confidence boost to go the extra mile during Skype sex. And there's nothing more sexy than confidence. Take your time choosing something that makes you feel good, whether it's some sexy lingerie or that latex outfit you've been dreaming about.
Skype sex is the perfect time to create new and exciting scenarios. Your imagination can take you anywhere in the world. If there’s a little sexual something that you’ve always wanted to try then this is the time to embrace those ideas. Don’t be afraid to talk about your fantasies with your partner. Remember: communication is key. And talking openly about your sexual satisfaction can, you guessed it, lead to a better and healthier sex life. No brainer if you ask us.
Perhaps introduce some sex toys into the discussion, and there are loads of options when it comes to long-distance sex toys . There are some great toys now run by apps such as the We Vibe Sync which means you can control how they work from opposite sides of the world and then watch how they enjoy the benefits. If that’s something that you find a little daunting then practice makes perfect. Start off small and work your way up as your confidence grows.
This is the part the most people struggle with, using language that you wouldn’t normally use can feel alien on the tongue and can inhibit the quality of your Skype sex session. This is another case of practice makes perfect. Again, starting small can definitely help. Ultimately this is the perfect opportunity for you to hone your dirty talk skills.
Seems obvious right? But for lots of couples it’s a key element that often gets missed out. The orgasm is the cherry on the Skype sex cake. It finishes off your session perfectly and means that when you revisit or even go again you have something to aim for.
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Set up a phone date. While it's true that, as with any other kind of sex, phone sex can "just happen", the session is more likely to go well if you've planned ahead, especially if it's your first time doing it together.

Pick a time when you're both alone and free to let your inhibitions loose. Your plan won’t work if you're rolling around in bed, feeling hot and heavy, while your partner is shivering in the rain outside the library.
If your partner is new to phone sex or feeling unsure, consider sending them this article, or reading it together.
Don't forget that you can always discuss what you'd like to do during phone sex before you start.

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Let loose and get in the mood . It will be difficult for you to enjoy yourself if you feel tense or silly, so before you call, do whatever you need to do to get yourself comfortable and feeling sexy.

Let loose: Lie in bed for a while, browse the internet, have a glass of wine , jog on the spot, do a silly song and dance in front of the mirror -- anything that will allow you to release the tension from your body.

Get in the mood: Setting up a sexy atmosphere can help put you in the right frame of mind, so consider doing whatever you'd do to prepare for any other kind of sex. Here are some ideas:

Tidy up your room and make the bed
Dim the lights, perhaps set up some candles
Play soft music
Have a bath or shower (and a shave, if you like)
Think of a role play to spice up the call (you two skinny dipping, etc.) [1]
X
Expert Source

Nicole Moore Love & Relationship Coach

Expert Interview. 6 October 2021.

Put on (or take off!) your favorite, sexiest clothes, and underwear
Set out some sex toys
Turn yourself on by gently caressing your body, or thinking about your lover, or imagining sexual encounters you've had or would like to have... but don't let yourself get too turned on just yet -- that's what the phone call is for!

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Begin the call. Once you have your partner on the phone, take things at a speed you're both comfortable with. There's no "correct" way to have phone sex.

If it helps you relax, spend a few minutes chatting before you get started... just don't let yourselves get distracted from your sexy goal.
A low, soft tone of voice or heavy breathing can help set the mood, but don't force it if doing so is unnatural for you: speaking and breathing comfortably in your normal tone of voice will be sexier than an awkwardly forced attempt at sounding sexy.

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Introduce a casual topic that will segue nicely into sexy talk. Getting started is possibly the hardest part, especially if it's your first time! Pick a topic that's easy for you to bring up, but which has the potential to spiral into steamier territory. Examples:

How much you miss them, or wish they were with you
What you would like to do if they were with you
What you're wearing and how you look in it
What you're doing
How you're feeling
Ask your partner to describe any of the above to you

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Escalate into sexy talk. Once you have the ball rolling and you're feeling comfortable, try getting bolder with y
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