How To Fist Your Ass
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If you are into being stretched, fisting can be super hot. But fisting can also be incredibly dangerous and lead to injuries so bad that they can kill you. This guide will coach you on how to fist your partner safely.
While fisting isn’t for everyone, it can certainly seem overwhelming to those who don’t understand the difference between fisting and punching. It’s best to start by answering the question “What is fisting?”.
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Fisting, despite what the name suggests, doesn’t involve inserting an entire fist or even making a fist at all during the process. This is a common mistake people make when first learning how to fist fuck and discovering what fisting means.
However, it makes the hand much bulkier and wider, and no amount of lube makes will make this comfortable for most people. As it stands, fisting isn’t going to be everyone’s cup of tea.
So what does the hand look like in fisting? Rather than being an actual fist, it’s shaped more like a duck, just like in the picture above. Fisting lovers call this the “silent duck.” Your partner will pull his pinky and index fingers toward the middle finger and fold his thumb up against the bottom of his fingers to create a duckbill shape. The more he’s able to taper his hand, the easier insertion will be.
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You can engage in both anal or vaginal fisting. The latter is especially common among gay men, and it is those men who are credited with fisting’s recent rise in popularity. In fact, fisting clubs existed in the 1970s [1]. However, fisting has become popular among some straight couples since then.
Some people speculate that the increase of rough sex in porn correlates with an increase in rough sex activities, including fisting, in real life [2], but we’re not too worried. A kink is a kink.
But it’s not just women who enjoy fisting. Many men enjoy fisting, too, as both givers and receivers.
Some people experiment with a little bit of solo fist fucking too.
A question that many people have about fist fucking is “Does fisting hurt?” The answer is pretty obvious:
Just like anal sex, fisting can be painful if you do not follow the recommended guidelines.
There are as many reasons to enjoy specific sexual acts as there are acts to enjoy! Two people can enjoy fisting but for different reasons.
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Testing Your Limits – Fisting can be appealing because you are testing your body’s limits and many people experience a sense of achievement after successful fisting. It’s hot to know you can take something so large as your partner’s hand. This is something you might have achieved when you had sex with someone who was especially well-endowed in the past! It’s even better when you’re taking something bigger.
Increased Intimacy – Another thing that fisting lovers can’t stop raving about is how it can increase intimacy. When your partner’s entire hand is inside you, after all the time and patience that it requires, it can be incredibly intimate. This isn’t to say that other types of sex aren’t intimate, but fisting can be surprisingly so!
Taboo – For others, the novelty or taboo may contribute to their enjoyment of fisting. And fisting may stimulate the G-spot or P-spot, which answers the question “Why do people like fisting?”. But you can’t know what fisting feels like until you try it yourself.
Aside from hand shape, the keys to successful fisting are all about preparing. If you’re not fully ready, fisting, like anal sex, isn’t the sort of thing you should try at the spur of the moment. It’s certainly not something to try for the first time when you’re drunk and horny.
These fisting tips will help you achieve maximum success when it comes to fisting.
When you take all these factors into consideration, your fisting session will look something like the following. Your partner lubes up your vagina if it’s needed after your prior activities and his hand up to the wrist. A towel or sex blanket is great for catching any extra lube that might drip! It’s also useful if you’re a squirter.
He’ll insert two fingers and manually massage your vagina to loosen it up. When you’re comfortable, he can insert another finger. He continues to insert fingers as long as it comfortable for you, forming the duck shape with his hand. He’ll complete the shape by folding in his thumb.
The ends of the fingers will be easier to insert while his knuckles will be the widest part and need the most time and lube to insert. Once the knuckles are in, it’s smooth sailing from there.
After he’s successfully inserted, your man can experiment with a few fisting techniques. These include flexing his fingers and thumb, thrusting and rotating. Once his hand is inside you, it doesn’t need to stay in any particular position!
You can pair fist fucking with any other type of stimulation that you like — clitoral, nipple, or other erogenous zones. Meanwhile, your partner can try any of the following fisting techniques.
When you’re done, he’ll want to return to the silent duck position before removing his hand. But don’t do it too quickly because this can be uncomfortable. Relaxing your muscles can help your partner remove his hand.
Note that you may not achieve full insertion during your first time fisting, even if you fully prepare. It’s up to your body to cooperate, and you won’t want to push yourself too much, which could potentially lead to injury. It can take a few tries to get fisting right.
You may want to try different lube formulas too to find one that works the best for you when you’re fisting with your partner.
Furthermore, this process takes some time and should not be rushed through. After each new finger is added, your partner should pause to let you get used to the sensation.
Most sex positions that work for fingering will work well for fisting, both anal and vaginal. You can try lying on your back while your partner fists you. Bring your knees up toward your chest if it helps.
Alternatively, lying on your side might also be comfortable, and you can bend your top leg to be more comfortable.
Finally, try getting on all fours with your partner penetrating you from behind. This position may not be ideal for longer sessions as your arms can become tired from supporting your body. You can try propping yourself up with pillows or leaning over a piece of furniture.
However, other positions may work well for fisting as well, so make sure to experiment to find what works best for you.
When it comes to fisting yourself, any positions that allow you to comfortably penetrate your vagina or anus with your first works. Consider lying on your back or sitting.
Even lying on your side and reaching behind yourself can be comfortable depending on your flexibility. Again, make sure to do a little experimentation to find what works best for you.
So you’ve mastered how to fist fuck and want to try something else. What options are there once you get past fisting for beginners?
Fisting can be a lot of fun, but that doesn’t mean it comes without risks. This includes the possibility of tearing the vaginal entrance or walls [3]. The perineum or skin between the anus and vagina can tear from violent fisting [4]. Even micro-tears can lead to infections or make it easier to contract an STI [5]. Consider scheduling fisting after any other penetration because other activities can introduce bacteria into the vagina or anus, which might have small abrasions that could become infected.
When it comes to anal fisting, it’s especially easy to transmit an infection!
Secondly, you’ll want to be careful about your cervix. Some women don’t mind if their cervix gets jostled, but it’s uncomfortable for others.
When it comes to anal fisting, you’re are likely to cause injury the deeper you go.
Many difficulties with fisting can be overcome as long as you are vocal about what you like and don’t like, and your partner heeds your feedback. If you find it difficult to talk about sex, you might want to read our guide to sexual communication before trying fisting for the first time. This isn’t the sort of activity you want to do with a one-night stand.
Finally, you want to take as much time as possible. If you don’t get it right the first time, don’t worry! There’s always next time. And if it turns out fisting isn’t for you? At least, you can say you tried!
You should definitely be aware of the dangers of fisting mentioned above. However, these risks can be minimized by preparing and being cautious. Vaginal injuries may be rare from fisting [3], but they are still a possibility. Remember that vaginal sex is not without its risks, either. That’s why you use condoms to prevent pregnancy and STIs, use lube, and get STI screenings. It’s not about asking “Is fisting safe?” but finding the ways to make it as safe as possible.
If you are especially susceptible to infections or prolapse, you may want to rethink fisting, but many people have safely tried it.
When you have the right partner, know how to fist and prepare for it, and take your time, you might find that this is one of those things you can’t live without!
While a little bleeding may not be an emergency, you should seek immediate medical attention if you experience any excessive bleeding after fisting. Similarly, you should seek medical care if bleeding persists for several days.
This is true whether you’re bleeding after fisting vaginally or anally. Tears may need surgical repair and can become infected.
As with any sexual activity, there’s a possibility that only one partner will enjoy fisting. Perhaps you love what fisting feels like but your partner finds the activity to be too difficult. It’s also possible that your partner might want to continue fisting you, while you find it uncomfortable or even painful.
Regardless, no one should feel pressured to do anything in bed that they don’t want to, especially an activity such as fisting, which can cause injury if not done safely. Your partner should respect your wishes if you explain that fisting is something you don’t want to do and vice versa. A partner who doesn’t respect your sexual wishes doesn’t deserve to have sex with you.
However, if you two are willing to cooperate, you might find a middle ground. For example, you may engage in fisting for a special occasion or simply stick to as many fingers as can be comfortably inserted without full fisting. Large toys may also allow you to experience the filling feeling of fisting, even if you don’t have a partner.
One of the risks of fisting, especially anal fisting, is anal prolapse, where the rectum wall loosens and becomes visible outside of the rectal canal. This can occur if your activities are too rough or you use numbing products during fisting. The vagina can similarly prolapse.
While anal fisting doesn’t cause hemorrhoids, it can irritate them. Anal sex may contribute to higher levels of anal incontinence [6], especially in women, and it’s reasonable to assume that anal fisting may do the same.
A sudden pop or tear can occur from stretching vaginal and anal tissues, and large tears known as fistulas can occur over time. There is a possibility of a perforated colon too, and air and blood can become displaced into other areas of the body [7]. Any tears in the vagina or rectum can become infected. Untreated infections can lead to death [8], and there have been several deaths reported as a result of fisting [9, 10, 11].
However, many of these injuries can be avoided by taking things slow, using lube, trimming nails, wearing gloves, listening to your body, and NEVER experimenting with fisting while under the influence.
Have you tried fisting? Do you love it or hate it? Perhaps you have fisting tips from experience. Let us know in the comments section!
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Is there a way to prep the perinium? To make it softer?
I suggest introducing during playtime perineal massage for a few weeks. Then you progressively try. Remember, if it hurts, step a notch back. For your safety, never use numbing agents. It may take weeks to get to do it confortably, but the reward is amazing. At the very least, you gain trust in yourself and your body. Most probably the intimacy level with your SO will go off the charts ?
If doing it analy how long roughly would you say to train your but to except someone stretching your anus ready for you to be fisted I know it could be a while but just wondering a rough time
You’re not going to like this answer, but it depends.
My girlfriend and I have discussed fisting extensively. I was the one who first brought it up. I want her to fist my anus.
While she isn’t as experienced as I am sexually, she has, to my delight, become my Mistress too.
She’s read a lot about fisting, and I have forwarded this page to her.
I have a QUESTION which I can’t find the answer to online. …
What does the Fister do with their hand and fingers once it’s inside my anus??
– mostly keep it in the same positon?
– open her hand ?
– massage the prostate or other things inside the anus?
– mostly go in and out?
PS Both of us can’t wait to introduce fisting into our love life and Dom/sub relationship.
It’s not at all about pain for us, or a punishment. Its about moving to different things, experiencing, and achieving a higher level of pleasure and intimacy.
My advice on this is simple. Do what feels pleasurable. If keeping them in the same position feels best, do that. But the same is true for any movement/lack of movement during fisting.
That was awesome. I’m new to the fisting experience. I can just about get my own fist up there. Keep practicing, you’ll get it. Good luck 👍
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~*Because hands are free sex toys you already own*~.
Fisting, or the act of penetrating someone with a fist, might seem pretty intense, but with the right partner, a lot of lube, and some patience, it’s doable. For many people, when they think about fisting, the thing that pops into mind is that scene in Chasing Amy where Amy makes a hole with one hand and then shoves a fist through it with the other like, “Ta-da!” and Ben Affleck's character is like, “WTF???” But it's not necessarily that WTF!
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A vagina can fit a lot more than you’d think — like, a whole human baby can come out of there — and you guessed it, a human fist can fit in there as well. But fisting isn’t as simple as throwing a fist up someone’s vagina (or butt), because you pretty much can’t do that unless you have an ocean of lube and a super-relaxed vagina and maybe tiny hands. But what do you do instead?
When Cosmo consulted queer friends on the matter, one woman, Samantha, 44, said that it’s not her thing personally, but she knows a lot of lesbians who do it. She says that since she’s been with her partner in a monogamous relationship for 11 years, they’ve definitely tried a lot of things during that time, with fisting being one of them. Her advice? “Use a lot of lube and a lot of patience. It isn’t something that can be rushed, and the fist can’t just be pummeled into your partner.”
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Queer porn performer Andre Shakti says she loves fisting, and it’s actually her “preferred way to get off when I’m bottoming with a partner.” Shakti also makes an excellent point about how rarely we hear about women fisting other women in movies. Most mentions of fisting in pop culture seem to be geared toward people making anal-fisting jokes that are centered “either around male homosexuality or around a man purchasing the services of a sex worker to be fisted,” Shakti tells Cosmopolitan.com. So the idea of a woman penetrating another woman with her hand is often lost on mainstream media all together.
Despite this, Shakti says she likes the feeling of “fullness” and pressure when she’s being penetrated, and nothing else she’s tried has been able to give her a comparable feeling. Shakti feels “our hands are our best sex toys, yet they are often overlooked completely or seen as reserved exclusively for foreplay,” and if you don’t have a penis, the idea of being able to insert an entire part of your body in a partner (or vice versa) can be incredibly intimate and erotic. Plus, not having to drop a ton of cash on a fancy vibrator or dildo because your hands are ~free~ is definitely an added bonus.
Carol Queen, PhD, co-author of The Sex & Pleasure Book: Good Vibrations Guide to Great Sex for Everyone, says she’s always enjoyed fisting as “a very intense sexual act that’s all about appreciating fullness,” though she cautions it shouldn’t be done too quickly, especially if the receiver isn’t that turned on yet. She also recommends as much communication as possible so you can know when your receiving partner is ready for more and when they want you to stop moving.
So without further adieu, let’s dive right in (pun totally intended) with some tips on how to fist and be fisted.
Katherin Winnick, sex coach and Deputy Editor at Letstalksex.net, says that if you're on the receiving end of fisting, you can help stretch out your vagina and get used to the sensation of more than usual by trying an inflatable dildo or butt plug (if you're doing anal fisting). There are also specially designed sex toys meant to mimic the look and feel of a fist, if you wanna get realistic with it.
Doc Johnson Belladonna's Bitch Fist Realistic Fisting Dildo
Winnick also says that having an orgasm (at least one, but if you go for multiple, do you!) can help relax your PC muscles and get ready for receiving.
Remember, porn really isn't a realistic portrayal of sex most times, and you def shouldn't feel like you need to compare
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