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If you’re like most people in a long-term relationship, you probably have a lot of sex in your bedroom. Sex might not be bad, but it might be pretty routine and lack that special something ( sexual chemistry , anyone?). If you have kids or roommates, you may have to keep to this routine whether or not it’s working for you. Or do you?
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Why not consider sex in a hotel room? Hotel sex can be sexually liberating and may even kick start your sex life once more! If it’s a fantasy of yours, check it off your list. You might be able to achieve some other common fantasies while you’re checked into a hotel room.
Just why do people seem to love hotel sex so much? Here are a few of the positives of a little nookie in a rented room:
There are some drawbacks to having sex in a hotel room, of course.
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You know the cons of hotel sex, but you still want to check hotel sex off your sexual bucket list ? Awesome! Here are some tips to ensure you and your man have a good time, especially if you want to make sex in a hotel into a common occurance.
While the advice in this post has focused on how you can have hot hotel sex, we would be remiss if we didn’t offer a bit of advice about how to be a good guest in addition to the hotel sex tips below. You can experience a ton of pleasure without being selfish and making another person’s life harder and creating an extra mess.
First, make sure to bring cash to tip the housekeeper — between $2 and $5 per night depending on how nice the hotel is. You might also need cash for a shuttle or someone who takes care of your luggage. Not only does this put you in the staff’s good graces, but it prevents you from losing a deposit or even being banned.
Secondly, avoid undue damage to the room of facilities. Make sure to clean up any lube that spills and toss the condoms in the trash can – not the toilet! Don’t get condoms stuck in shower or pool drains. Don’t use shower fixtures to support your weight when trying hotel sex positions. They’re not meant to take your body weight and can break, leaving you injured and with a big bill. However, you can purchase suction cup handles and footrests if you want to get down in the shower.
Speaking of condoms, clean up anything that’s touched bodily fluids, so the staff won’t have to touch it. Wrap used condoms or dental dams in tissue before placing them in the trash so that they won’t get stuck. Wrapping in a plastic bag is another option. If you’re not going to take sex toys with you, wash them and place them in the trash, preferably wrapped up.
Furthermore, put up that Do Not Disturb sign so that no one walks in on you!
Finally, you can be especially courteous by collecting towels and linens in a single location, such as in the tub, and emptying all trash cans into one can.
…many of whom might be there with family. So try to keep noise to a minimum. Why not try a ball gag if you’re into bondage ? Or you can make it a game that your man must be good by being as quiet as possible no matter how much you please or torture him.
Avoid events such as conventions that can flood a hotel with guests — sometimes thousands at a time! — and ruin the ambiance when booking. Ask for a secluded room if you want extra privacy. Once at the hotel, pay attention to when people leave. Many people leave their hotel room in the morning and return at night only to sleep, so you may actually have more privacy during the waking hours!
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Since you won’t be at home, you’ll need to bring everything with you. What does that include?
You might not need everything on this list for your foray into hotel sex, but make sure you don’t forget anything! Nothing’s more of a downer than being ready to go and realizing you’ve forgotten condoms, and the local gas station only carries that kind. You definitely don’t want to take a risk like that with your sex life. If hotel sex is part of a vacation for you, then you’ll want to pack all those goodies just like you would that extra pair of socks!
Just remember to pack everything back up with you. You don’t want some poor staff member to discover your dildo or to have to call the front desk when you realize you’ve left an expensive vibrator behind. So this means you might leave the big bondage gear at home while taking only a few ties to make some hotel sex positions possible.
Reading reviews is a great way to determine that a hotel is clean or to see what kind of issues it has had with cleanliness and potential pests (bed bugs, etc.).
Here’s a tip for hotel sex: if you’re worried about the cleanliness of the room, you can pull back the bed cover to look for signs of bugs or lack of cleaning. Better yet, remove the cover from bed and ask for a spare blanket, which has most likely been laundered more frequently than the bed cover.
Use a hard-sided bag to keep pests out of your luggage, and keep it off the floor with a luggage rack. Keep everything sealed in plastic bags.
If you bring your own pillow, use a plastic pillow protector.
Consider a hotel where you can rent by the hour, especially if you don’t intend to stay the whole night, anyway. For some people, it might be nice to enjoy the pool or continental breakfast, but if this is all about sex for you, there’s no reason to spend more time or money than you wish. Of course, this isn’t what you’re looking for when you have sex on vacation, but if you’re just sneaking out for a night with your man, it can save some cash!
This hotel sex idea will make your night or weekend of hotel sex memorable. Instead of hopping in the car with your man, show up separately. It makes things extra thrilling! Perhaps you’ll be waiting in the room in your finest lingerie when he shows up, or he’ll have planned a romantic evening. There’s just something about not coming home to your same bed in your same bedroom that’s exciting! That’s not the only reason you should take different cars, either.
We already mentioned how you can meet up with your man in the hotel bar and pretend to be strangers. Dress to the nines ( tip for dressing sexy ) and remind your man how lucky he is to have you. This gives you the chance to flirt (brush up on your flirting techniques ) like you’re not dating or married, which might just send a shiver of thrill down your spine. Then, one of you can invite the other back to your room or, if you know it’ll work out, you can “spontaneously” decide to rent a hotel room and go at it like rabbits.
If you’re checking into a nicer hotel, see if you can get a couple’s package for your suite. These typically include champagne and services, such as a couple’s massage. They’re readily available on Valentine’s Day, but you might also be able to schedule one for your anniversary or just because!
It’s hard to let go and enjoy yourself if you’re worried about the kids, so make sure you plan ahead and have a trustworthy babysitter or family member who can watch them.
Just spending time in a hotel room that’s clean and quiet can be a nice change of pace. However, upgrading your room to one with a hot tub or even to a suite can make you feel like you’re in the lap of luxury. Plus, those rooms may come with special perks!
It might not be something you can afford all the time, but this hotel sex tip is worth considering if you really want to break out of your routine.
While this hotel sex idea won’t work in every room, consider hotel sex positions where you’ll be in front of the open or sheer curtains as long as your room isn’t on a lower floor or facing a public area such as the parking lot or courtyard.
We would hope that most people who go to a hotel for sex are actually paying attention to their partners, but with smartphones, WiFi, and TV, we can’t be sure. So make sure to turn off or put your phone away when you should be talking or making love with your man. There might be times such as when he’s in the shower when you can catch up with your emails, or you both might agree to check your phone for five minutes, but there’s nothing worse than trying to talk to someone who is ignoring you for their screen.
If you have trouble staying at the moment, you might enjoy mindfulness. Mindfulness can improve lubrication [ 3 p 111], sexual desire, [ 4 ], sexual function [ 5 , 6 ]. and satisfaction [ 7 , 8 , 9 ]. Don’t forget to check out our podcast with Lori Brotto , where she goes in depth on how mindfulness can help you to have better sex.
There’s something to be said for staying in your room and ordering room service or delivery. You can enjoy hotel robes — or bring your own. Lounge in bed with your lover before taking a long, hot shower together.
Of course, you can always show up together after a delicious meal or show. Make hotel room sex part of your date night.
While going to a hotel and staying in the room or renting a hotel for just an hour can be amazing, you might feel more like you’re on vacation if you bring clothes for a night on the town and make a whole date of it. Reconnecting with your man may make you feel more like having sex once you return to your room. Plus hotel shuttles or on-site restaurants/bars means no one needs to stay sober for the drive home.
While having sex in a hotel can be great, it may not always be feasible for financial or other reasons. Consider these alternatives instead.
And if you crave novelty but can’t get it in other ways, even just trying new sex positions can be novel [ 10 ].
Even if you only get to have sex on vacation in a hotel once or twice a year, you can make the memories of a lifetime.
Although motel sex is appealing to many people, it might not be your thing, and that’s okay. There are a few reasons why you might not like hotel room sex, including the fact that a room and linens that are not cleaned may contain others’ bodily fluids and the risk of being overheard. If you are anxious and distressed and not relaxed, it can be more difficult to have an orgasm [ 11 ], and anxiety can contribute to sexual dysfunction [ 12 ].
However, you might be able to get some reassurance for yourself by performing a few checks that the room is clean. If one side of the bed is close to the wall, check between the wall and bed. A staff that makes a point to clean in hard-to-reach areas are obviously going to clean the rest of the room just as thoroughly. Similarly, clean switches, outlets, and knobs are a good sign.
Bringing your own pillows to ensure you’ll be comfortable during sleep — and sex can is also a good idea. Lack of physical comfort can interfere with sex [ 13 p 40].
Finally, rest assured that most people who have ever stayed or worked in a hotel have heard people having sex, yet hotel workers do not frequently receive complaints about the noise. If it helps, you might ask for a secluded room; however, that’s not always an option.
If you decide to go ahead with hotel sex, even if you’re a bit anxious, you might try these tips to make yourself horny .
But if you’re just more comfortable having sex at home, you can still take steps to make sure you don’t fall into a routine. Ship the kids off to the babysitters, put fresh linens on your bed, light a candle, draw a bubble bath, and see where the night takes you.
There may be cause for concern if you share a home, and your partner never wants to have sex in it. He could just be looking for novelty so, it’s a good idea to talk to him about it.
If you’re seeing someone and he only wants to meet at a hotel f
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