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Big news: Scissoring isn't just for lesbians!
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What is scissoring? Because, let’s face it, you always wanted to know
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Seen that steamy scissoring sex scene in Blue is the Warmest Colour? Watched in wonderment as South Park’s Mr Garrison went lesbian, had a hot scissoring session and shouted “Scissor me timbers”?
Scissoring, also known as tribbing, is not a myth. It’s essentially genital-to-genital contact, and can be done in different positions.
It’s called scissoring because it requires sexual partners to move their legs back and forth, while rubbing their genitals against their partner’s, resembling the movement of scissors – obviously.
There’s some confusion over the terms tribadism, tribbing and scissoring…
From what we’ve gathered, tribadism, or tribbing, is a more general term for a sex act between women, in which the pair rub vulvae together for sexual stimulation – notably of the gift that keeps on giving, aka the clitoris.
That said, though tribadism is often used to describe vulva-to-vulva fun, it actually encompasses various girl-on-girl sexual activity of any kind.
That could be humping in the missionary position, or the movement of the vulva against another person’s thigh, bum, leg, arm… wherever, really. (Wrists work well, as do faces.)
Ergo, tribadism and tribbing mean non-penetrative lesbian sex, while scissoring more specifically describes the actual scissor position.
Nevertheless, all three are erotic ways of timing hip movement as two bodies grind, rub and swivel, which can result – very easily for some – in orgasm.
If you’re not convinced, Urban Dictionary defines scissoring as: “A lesbian sex act where two partners interlock their spread legs (like two pairs of scissors) and grind their vulvae together to stimulate each other’s clitoris to orgasm.
“Also called tribadism, the practice has many colloquialisms. In some Central American countries it is called ‘making tortillas’, and the Chinese refer to the act as ‘polishing mirrors’.”
Used in a sentence, via UD: “I felt myself get hard as I peeked through the window and watched Ellen and Anne get naked and make out on the bed, but it wasn’t until they began scissoring that I realised I had just creamed in my pants.”
(Sorry, we couldn’t not include that gem.) You go, Ellen and Anne!
And, Urban Dictionary defines tribbing as: “From ‘tribadism’ which refers to lesbianism. Derived from the Greek ‘tribas’ (a lesbian) and ‘tribo’ which is the verb ‘to rub’.
“‘Tribo’ is when two women rub their vulvas and clitoris’ together as a form of non-penetrative sex. Can also refer to ‘frottage’ (rubbing) of the woman’s vulva against something for sexual stimulation.
“Not specific to humans, this behaviour is also observed in nature. In particular bonobo monkeys, where female to female genital rubbing is common (about once every two hours).”
Some LGBT gals prefer good old fashioned face f**king to scissoring. Some are really good at scissoring and absolutely rave about it, others find it troublesome and exhausting.
Contrary to popular belief, scissoring is not the ultimate lesbian position – it’s not the lesbian version of straight missionary sex.
It’s very much A Thing, it’s just not everyone’s thing, and it’s certainly not the be all and end all of sapphic shagging.
Mal Harrison, sexologist and director of the Center for Erotic Intelligence , told Refinery29 : “Fifteen years ago, scissoring just wasn’t something commonly discussed in lesbian circles, nor amongst my lesbian and bisexual clients.
“Now, I frequently hear it mentioned as part of the repertoire, simply because people are getting more of their ideas and sex ed from porn.”
If you’ve been busy scissoring all day without a care in the world, remember, women who have sex with other women can get STIs and vaginal infections .
“Women can catch STIs such as herpes, genital warts and chlamydia when exchanging bodily fluids,” says Stonewall chief exec Ruth Hunt.
“Any one-on-one contact, such as oral sex or using the same hand when touching yourself and then your partner, can put you at risk. Two women who are both menstruating are at a higher risk, too.”
Infections can be transmitted via hands, fingers and genital contact, so wash hands before and after sex.
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February 3, 2021, 3:00 PM · 9 min read
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Big news: Scissoring isn't just for lesbians!
What do your junk drawer and bedroom have in common? Scissors. Well, one should have scissors you use to cut (✂️), and the other should have the scissoring sex position you use for pleasure (✂️ ✂️ 😈).
While you might equate scissoring with vulva-on-vulva action, it's actually a far more expansive and inclusive sex position than mainstream porn (sigh) might have you believe. "Scissoring sex is any sex act that involves genital-on-genital rubbing or grinding," explains body-positive pleasure expert Carly S., founder of Dildo or Dildon't .
The position earned its name because it most commonly entails two people spreading their legs, "like two pairs of open scissors, and then meeting at the middle," according to Sarah Sloane, a sex educator and coach at Good Vibrations and Pleasure Chest . It can be accomplished by both partners lying on their back or sides, or with one partner straddling the other.
But that's just the beginning. Read on for everything you need to know about scissoring and how to scissor with any genital combination.
"Historically, scissoring was a sex act that involved two vulva-owners pressing their vulvas against each other," says Sloane. Key word here: historically! These days, what qualifies as scissoring has expanded to include any genital-on-genital contact, says Carly S.
Thanks to PornHub categories scissoring has a reputation as "The Lesbian Sex Act," but this is false. "Scissoring is not a lesbian sex act," agrees Sloane. For one, not everyone who tries or likes scissoring identifies as a lesbian. Sexual orientation, after all, is determined by personal identification, not by which sex acts you prefer. Second, there are many lesbians who do not practice the scissor sex position, and this fact does not make them any less lesbian. (More: An Insider's Guide to Sleeping with Another Woman )
"Vulva owners have a lot of erectile tissue under the labia (including the clitoris), which can be stimulated through external stimulation," says Sloane. ICYDK, your clit is much more than that little nub at the top of your labia; super sensitive clitoral tissue extends under the labia on either side of your vulva, and so stimulating this entire area (which scissoring certainly does) can absolutely feel amazing and add to your arousal. Fun fact: Many vulva-owners' clitorises will become engorged and their labia will become heavier and puffier (yes, it's essentially having a hard-on ) during scissoring thanks to all the blood rushing to the entire area and filling up that erectile tissue in response to being turned on, says Sloane.
Another cool thing about scissoring is that your pelvic floor muscles automatically activate when you move your pelvis in a grinding motion against your partner, she says. (Yep, grinding is basically like doing a lot of tiny pelvic tilts in Pilates !). Because orgasms are essentially a series of pelvic floor contractions , she says that you may notice that orgasms come more quickly during this position as a result.
As for penis-owners? "Scissoring allows them to experience the sensation of rubbing their penis against something warm (and sometimes wet) attached to a person they either love or are sharing a sexual experience with," says Carly S. Inherently, that's going to feel good, she says. (See: Hot Take: Grinding Is the Most Underrated Sex Act )
Even though vaginas naturally produce quite a bit of lubrication during sex, it's specifically your vagina (that's the internal canal) that produces the lubricant, and not the vulva (the external part of female genitals). Because your vulva is what's experiencing most of the friction while scissoring, this can cause chaffing (ouch).
An easy fix: " Adding a bit of store-bought lubricant to the vulva can help increase the sensation, and help the genitals glide more easily against each other," says Sloane.
"Scissoring can be intense with clothing on, too," says Sloane. "You might have one partner leave their jeans on so the second partner can experience additional friction." Or you might both keep your clothing on in a dry-humping move.
In terms of energy expenditure and prerequisite strength and stamina, scissoring is right up there with Rider On Top (which you might know as cowgirl). Once you get into the scissoring start position, you're going to want to move your genitals up and down against each other in order to stimulate your genitals, explains Sloane. This movement calls on your glutes, core, quads, and hamstrings big time.
If you get tired halfway through, ask your partner to switch up who's doing the most of the work, says Carly S. (Usually the person on top is doing more work than the person on bottom). "You can also switch to a different sex act altogether," she says. You might, for example, take a breather during spooning sex or mutual masturbation , then return to scissoring once you're rested up.
On that note, just as you wouldn't jump into a workout without warming up first, you shouldn't jump into scissoring without warming up first. "Stretching your hips ahead of time may help make the position more comfortable," says Carly S. Runner lunges, frog stretch, figure 4, and 90/90 stretch will do the trick. (You might also take a hip-opening partner yoga class together .)
Also, H2O plays a key role in helping your muscles function . While a mid-romp cramp is really NBD — just get out of position and shake it off — if you can avoid them with a few gulps, you might as well. (As a bonus, begin well hydrated can increase your ability to self-lubricate .)
"Don't be afraid to use your surroundings to help you position your body," says Carly S. Have a headboard? Hang onto it. Getting down on the couch? Use the couches back or arms for leverage. Bed littered with pillows? Lean on them.
In fact, sex educator Marla Renee Stewart, M.A., sexpert for Lovers adult wellness brand and retailer recommends investing in a positioning pillow like the Liberator Wedge (Buy it, $110, lovehoney.com ). "Placing the positioner underneath your butt can help make sure your genitals are more easily-accessible," she says.
Uhh, what sex position isn't made better by the addition of a vibe?? (Hint: None). "Add some vibrations between both of your bodies for extra sensation," says Stewart. She recommends incorporating the We-Vibe Chorus (Buy it, $200, lovehoney.com ) which is a wearable couples vibrator that allows one partner to experience internal and external stimulation, and the other to experience external stimulation. (See More: Attention Couples of Any Gender Combo, You Need the We-Vibe Chorus )
Another option is a palm vibrator like the Romp Wave (Buy it, $30, amazon.com ), Le Wand Point (Buy it, $130, babeland.com ), or Dame Pom (Buy it, $100, babeland.com ). Ergonomically designed to curve around the vulva, Sloane suggests tucking the buzzing tag-a-long between your bods, "then rocking so you can both experience the sensation."
The sex toy possibilities here definitely aren't limited to vibrators. "Everything in the pelvic region is interconnected, so filling your vagina or anus with a non-vibrating toy like a butt plug or vaginal beads can enhance sensation all over," says Sloane. She recommends opting for a weighted version of these toys, such as the b-vibe Snug Plug 1 (Buy it, $48, babeland.com ) or Lelo Beads Noir Kegel Balls (Buy it, $50, babeland.com ) because with every thrust, the weight will shift, stimulating the nerves alongside your inner canal. "It's a pretty cool sensation," assures Carly S.
Point blank: If you or your partner(s) have a bony or protruding pelvis or hip bones, scissoring can be more "ouch" than "oh!" "One time after scissoring someone, my pelvic region was bruised from all the bone-on-bone grinding," says Carly S. Pass.
She recommends padding your bodies with something like the Pelle Whim Silicone Grinding Toy (Buy it, $98, feelpelle.com ) or the Trojan Tantrix Masturbation Sleeve (Buy it, $6, amazon.com ). "You can also cover the head of a wand vibrator with a Tenga Egg (Buy it, $9, babeland.com ), which allows you to pad your bodies while enjoying the vibrator."
"Scissoring is a lower-risk sexual activity, but it's not a no-risk sexual activity," says Sloane. Both STIs spread through skin-to-skin contact and STIs spread through bodily fluids can be spread during the position, she says. (See: How to Have Safer Sex Every Time )
If you don't both know your current STI status, or one or both of you currently has an STI, you can reduce the risk of transmission by using protection, says Sloane. If a penis is involved, that means an internal condom or external condom, while for two vulva-owners that means a dental dam. (Related: Let's Get Some Things Straight About Dental Dams )
You can also keep your pants or panties on. "[They're] not fluid-proof but wearing bottoms will certainly reduce the risk," she says. "Another option is to go for genital-on-hip grinding rather than genital-on-genital grinding."
Does your spin on scissoring include a penis going in a vagina? If so, pregnancy may be possible. Take the necessary precautions if creating a small human is not an outcome you are prepared for. (Related: How to Find the Best Birth Control for You )
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