Horny Peach

Horny Peach
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Thick and Horny Peach Published: Dec 30, 2017
The winner of the P vote of my Sexy Ladies of the Alphabet (yes im finally continuing that lol) And also my final post of 2017 ill see you all in 2018!!
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Don’t underestimate the power of the 😇.
If a picture is worth a thousand words, then an emoji has to be worth at least a hundred thousand, right? At least that’s what I tell myself when I want to send a scandalous sext without having to get camera-ready . A horny emoji can go a long way, friends. Who knew that a peach and an eggplant would one day become the most overtly sexual symbols on your keyboard? Not! Us!
Now, not all horny emojis are created equal. While some horny emojis reign supreme (as in, you can rest assured your sexting partner will know exactly what you mean when you send one), there are dozens of stealthy emojis that can carry a sexy underlying meaning. And while these innocent, unassuming lil pics might not immediately strike you as hot, when used correctly, they can be exactly the kind of sexy flirtation you want to inject into your convo, trust. That’s where we come in.
For your convenience, we’ve issued an official ranking of the horniest emojis, from least horny to most. So whether you want to let the person on the other end of the text bubble know that you want them right now or that you can’t stop thinking about that naughty thing they did to you last night , you’ll be heard loud and clear. (Any disputes/complaints can be emailed to 🍆@👉👌.com, thank you very much.)
While this combo definitely deserves a spot on the horny emojis list, it takes the last one because it’s simply too predictable. Use these when you’re not trying to leave any doubt or intrigue about what you’re trying to convey, à la, “Had a great time tonight bb 😘” or the classic “XO 💋.”
The only reason the heart eyes emoji isn’t classified above with the kissy face or kiss mark is because it can be used somewhat sarcastically in extremely sexual dirty talk sext-uations. It has range. Think: “I love your face 😍” but also “I can’t wait for you to cum on my face 😍.” Can you? Probably, tbh, but heart eyes will make them think you’re totally stoked about it.
You’re probably thinking we don’t need another set of fruit-/veggie-themed horny emojis, but these are just too obvious not to include on this list. Beyond the obvious “cherry popping” connotation that comes with the cherry emoji, the shape they’re in can also allude to boobs (in addition to the double melon combo 🍈🍈). And as for the banana emoji, it’s a phallic-shaped fruit that you peel back. Enough said. (Honorable mention: the watermelon emoji 🍉—thank you, Harry Styles.)
A stealthy horny emoji, use the to-go cup only to indicate you’re thirsty for them. Like, literally only use it when you’re using the word “thirsty” and you need them to come satisfy you pronto. It’s at the tail end of the list because it’s not the sexiest emoji ever, and it only really works in one specific circumstance. But some notable, slightly sexier cousins to indicate thirst in emojis include ice 🧊, water droplets 💦, and maybe, just maybe…rain 🌧, depending on your POV.
Ah, the shower emoji—harmless until you connect the dots. Said dots: wetness, squirting, another kind of shower (of the golden variety). Only to be used with explicit descriptions or on partners with whom these activities have happened IRL.
I know skeletons and skulls aren’t particularly sexy, nor is the concept of death just in general, but when used in the proper context, this emoji can convey exhaustion. You know, from all the sex you’re having. Think: “I’m so dead, still haven’t recovered from last night 💀.”
It’s a lady blowing wind. Need we say more?
If you’re a submissive partner texting your dominant partner , this emoji doesn’t really need an explanation for why it’s horny as hell. You already know. Next one.
Often used as slang for another type of plug (you know), the electric plug emoji doesn’t immediately come to mind when you’re thinking about sex. But what do you do with a plug? You put it in a wall socket. The penetrating partner? Plug. The receiving partner? Socket. Moral of the story? Everything can be made naughty if you have the right imagination.
While this emoji is usually used to represent anger or frustration, it’s also a great one to indicate how badly you want someone or how eager you are to hook up again, as in, “I want you to come over and do that again rn 😤.”
Technically, the ~explosion~ emoji is called “collision,” but let’s pretend you can use it to indicate how absolutely mind-blowing your last hookup/make-out sesh/encounter was. Easy, straightforward, and unexpected—we love to see it.
What do all these emojis have in common, you ask? Oh, just the fact that they’re perfect for role-play. If you and your sexting partner are into a little fantasy in the bedroom, use these (or any other emoji of a costume/outfit/uniform, like the mermaid 🧜‍♀️ or the firefighter 👩‍🚒) to tell them what scenario you want to play out next.
This emoji is perfect for when you want to convey how hot or ~spicy~ you’re feeling. Used in combination with the hot face (#7 on this list)? Lethal. You’re getting laid tonight.
Just as, if not more , obvious than the eggplant emoji is the bone emoji. Use when referring to their boner, peen, how hard they are /might be, the next time you’re boning, the last time you boned, how badly you want to jump their bones…you get the idea.
Alexa, play “Lollipop,” by Lil Wayne. Any sext with the word “suck” will be made ten times hotter with this emoji, trust.
Unless you or your partner plays hockey/soccer/any other sport where you’re supposed to make sure an object ends up in a net to score a point, this probably isn’t one of your most commonly used emojis, but it should be. And while times have evolved far past sex being referred to as “scoring,” consider this emoji a harmless way to tell your partner they’re going to win big tonight.
Send these only when the sex was so good, they deserve a prize. (Except the prize is you, naked, again.) (Unless you have access to the childhood trophy shelf in your parents’ basement.) (In which case, yes, you absolutely should steal/reclaim one and cover the lil plaque with a piece of paper that says “#1 Sex Champ.”)
Technically called the “folded hands” emoji, this obviously looks like two hands clapped together in prayer. Reserved for very naughty sexts only—use this emoji when you’re begging them to please you, as in, “I need you right now 🙏🏼.”
The pretzel isn’t just the number one best snack you can get at the shopping mall food court. It’s also the name of a super-hot sex position , hence why the pretzel emoji is perfect for demonstrating how you want them to twist and position your body or for when you want to reminisce about how flexible they are during kinky bedroom activities.
Carousel horse makes the cut only because it’s slightly sexier than the horse emoji, but both are things you can wrap your legs around and ride . Could also potentially be used interchangeably with the car emoji (“take you on a ride,” etc.) but only if they really *get* your humor.
A classic alternative to the words “fuck” and “bang,” “screw” comes in at number 22. It’s far from the sexiest-looking emoji, but send your FWB one of these out of the blue and they’ll get it. Oh , they’ll get it.
Similar to the screw emoji, the hammer emoji is just another way to tell your person you want them to come ~pound~ you. Period.
Are you tired of seeing food items on this list? I’m sorry, it’s just too easy. Tell them how quickly they’re going to melt in your hands next time you see them or explain how much you want them to make you melt. Smooth like butter, bb.
You play the drum. You listen to the drum. You know what else you do with a drum? You bang it. Hard. You’re welcome.
Arguably one of the hottest emojis on this list, the crying face is the perfect way to emphasize just about anything and everything. From how badly you want someone to how good the sex was/is to how much you miss them, add the crying face for extra oomph.
Back in my younger years, the fire emoji was just that: straight-up fire. You could use it in response to nudes, in response to a bestie’s IG, in reference to the weather, doing well at work/school, or even ironically (like if you’re absolutely not on fire).
But considering its versatility, it became completely overused to the point that it’s now just a lazy space filler. Sure, the person’s trying to (rightfully) suggest you’re killing it in some way, but with so many other options to choose from, this lacks the heart and creativity professional emoji users have come to expect.
“Mouth with uneven eyes” was released in early 2018. This unofficial “orgasm face” emoji is obviously, obviously horny but better used in an ironic-horny way. You don’t want to punctuate an iMessage sext sesh with 🥴 to indicate your climax, know what I mean? Still, this little guy deserves horny credit where credit is due, placing #16 on our list.
What’s sexier than the smoothness of jazz? Exactly . The saxophone emoji can be seen as a call to arms for getting it on. The smoother, more sophisticated version of a “U up?” text, if you will. Fire this baby away and your receiving partner will see it as you raising your eyebrows teasingly and making eyes at them, which is exactly how they should read it.
The overt innocence of the angel-face emoji means it’s most effectively deployed to offset a graphically horny sext or otherwise explicit message. It’s like the “Who, me?” of emojis. It might seem far from any horny meaning at first, but context is everything, baby! This emoji can turn an already dialed-up sext into an even hotter sext, because self-awareness. Maybe you seem pretty vanilla but you’re feeling particularly not-vanilla that day. Pepper in some angel-face emojis to show your multitudes.
The smirk face, while obviously horny, has to be used sparingly and with caution to work. It’s like the emoji equivalent of a wink (but not an actual wink because that’s too on the nose). This is best used similarly to the angel-face emoji in the sense that it’s super self-aware. The difference is the smirk is much cockier. Since it has major BDE, it’s best to let this emoji stand alone. After sending an extremely hot sext or saying something shockingly flirty, respond to their “omg 🤭😳👀” with a simple “😏😏😏” and they’ll be like putty in your thumbs. Just don’t use it too much or you’ll start to approach asshole status, mmkay?
The eggplant, once an icon of phallic imagery, is now only slightly horny due to extreme overuse. This little nightshade has peppered so many sexts that it’s hard to walk by certain sections of the produce department without blushing. If someone uses 🍆 in a text, the best-case scenario is that they fell asleep clutching their phone and accidentally tapped the eggplant and pressed send.
Peaches only rarely look like butt cheeks in real life, but on the emoji keyboard, every peach is An Ass. A string of 🍑🍑🍑 is a suitable and good response to a selfie in which someone’s butt looks good, but it’s not necessarily a horny response. The peach, with its demure little stem and perky leaves, is too innocent to ooze unbridled horniness, which is why it comes in behind the top 10.
Horny is an explicit feeling, but sometimes that feeling can be communicated with nuance: hence the sweat droplet emoji. Is it sweat? Is it jizz? Is it female ejaculate ? Is it a wet detritus made up of all those things? That’s for the receiver of a text containing 💦 to decide. And that ambiguity? It’s horny.
We all have this friend—let’s call him Mike—who, no matter the situation, is obsessed with making a sexual joke. Troy says things like “That’s what she said” but at the office. Mike is always muttering things under his breath, and when you say, “What was that?” he repeats his inappropriate joke at a higher volume and you immediately regret egging Mike on. This is the horny emoji combination preferred by Mikes. Yet it raises an interesting point: While this emoji string isn’t inherently horny, there is horny energy to someone who confidently whips out the 👉👌 in 2022.
Sometimes you can be horny for something that isn’t sex, namely a really good-looking piece of food, and that is what 😛 is best for. A string of 😛😛😛 is equally appropriate in response to a sizzling plate of fajita meat as it is to a flash-on mirror selfie in a bikini. It’s horny because no one would respond this way—tongue out, eyes wide open—in real life when feeling horned up, but over text? It works.
Turn up the heat on the eager tongue guy and you get yourself the hot-face emoji, perfect for expressing heat without leaning into the (now-retired, right?) fire emoji. While the tongue-out guy is a little more playful, the hot-face version is more of a “holy shit, you’re so hot, I’m going to worship the ground you walk on” kind of vibe. Use it sparingly for only the hottest of pics and sexts to let your sender know you’re feeling the temperature shift of the convo or image.
There’s maybe nothing hornier than someone who has the same reaction to literally everything, and the cowboy is the emoji encapsulation of that vibe. Sending a single 🤠, no context, to someone you regularly hook up with can be fairly interpreted as a nonverbal “I’m horny.” Sending 🤠 is a heads-up that the next time you two are together, it’s on . A 🤠 signifies legitimate excitement about the next chance to bone. If 🤠 were a real person, they’d fuck every day but, like, never talk about it.
One of my favorite horny emojis that doesn’t get used nearly enough is the simple wide eyes. Normally paired with another emoji like the hot-face guy or surfer (more on that later), the eyes are pretty straightforward, but that’s what makes them so great. While other emojis are more up for interpretation, the eyes literally say a nonverbal “I see you.” You can almost feel the blush and lip bite that would accompany these goggling eyes IRL.
It would be douchey to respond “ha, sick” to a sext, yet it is not douchey and is, in fact, extremely horny to reply “🤧🤧🤧” instead, effectively communicating the same thing. “🤧🤧🤧” is horny because it’s bold. It’s a simple way of saying, “I’m into this in ways words can’t convey.” It’s a show of horny respect, a placeholder for verbal validation to come.
The tiny smiling devil is maybe the purest of all the horny emoji. It’s impossible (well, not worth the effort) to know the origin behind the creation of 😈, but its modern meaning is something along the lines of, “I haven’t gotten laid in many months and my horniness has reached levels you could reasonably describe as evil.” The 😈 is what you send to friends before a night out on which your sole intention is to make out with a consenting stranger. It’s a depiction of chaotic horniness, the purest of all horn varieties.
The clown is reserved for a specific horny moment: feeling horny for an ex. The clown, with its wide eyes, inhumanly large smile, and tiny tufts of hair fluff, is brimming with horny-for-the-wrong-person energy. It’s horn with reckless abandonment. It’s putting your hand into the flames willingly. A 🤡 is a warning sign that you are about to do something stupid but, in the grand scheme, harmless. It says, “What I’m doing is stupid, and I know it, and I do not care.” It’s enviable and terrifying. It’s probably the most used horny emoji among Scorpios.
You know the meme that’s like “ my parents aren’t home ” with a blurry photo of someone/-thing rushing away? This emoji 🏄 is the cartoon representation of that meme. It’s a nonchalant way of saying, “I’m on my way [to absolutely rail the shit out of you].” It’s a polite way of saying, “Be there soon [to positively get that ass].” It’s so innocent that it crosses all the way back into horny territory.

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