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Commercial adult Web sites and applications live on, including one that's getting ready to debut its first iPhone application.
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OK. And, what the heck is a "sugar" lifestyle. I'm glad you asked. According to the site, it's "for generous men looking to spoil, and dynamic women looking for financial support with bills, or who just need some excitement in life!" Ah., OK, prostitution in other words. Or, I suppose you could look it as a try-out system for would-be mistresses.
There's nothing new about the world's oldest profession being online. Sure, over-zealous prosecutors managed to chase Craigslist out of the adult services business . So what? I see that another online classified ad site, Backpage , is now offering adult services ads. Anyone want to bet me that if Backpage is hammered in the same way Craigslist was there will be yet another online general purpose ad site with adult services ads up and running before the day is out?
And, of course, there's AshleyMadison , the infamous or well-known depending on how you look at it, site for married people to find others to have affairs with. Yes, there is an app for AshleyMadison.
But, to the best of my knowledge there's never been an app. for escorts before. The company claims that "The new, location-based app is designed to provide Sugar Daddies and Sugar Babies with a quick, effective and discreet way to locate one another as they go about their every-day lives."
Boy, doesn't that put everyone's worries about Apple's Locationgate mess into a whole new light! Congress, given the record of politicians and women of negotiable virtue should pay particular attention.
The company claims that "The SugarSugar Dating App will be available for download on June 1st through SugarSugar.com and iTunes, and will be compatible with iPhone, iPod touch, iPad, Android, and BlackBerry devices. The app will use GPS technology to instantly identify those seeking 'mutually beneficial' arrangements within the user's vicinity. After 'checking in, the application will map out the profiles of nearby members. Users will be able to trade stats, show photos or send messages to arrange an effortless rendezvous."
I should have seen this coming. Location-based software plus smartphone plus lust equals this application. And, all the efforts of police, outraged prosecutors seeking election to a higher office, and even Apple won't be able to stop it.
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Key points
It is now possible to use an app to find an escort.
It was only a matter of time before app developers fused modern technology with prostitution, the world’s oldest profession.
Though they may present some concerns, these apps could be a somewhat safer venue for finding an escort.
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There are many temptations to organize our life around the experience of earlier trauma. But that may short-change the future—which starts by our envisioning something better.
Posted December 15, 2014
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In today’s world, you can find pretty much anything if you just know which smartphone app to use. Looking for a nearby restaurant? Try OpenTable, UrbanSpoon, LocalEats or Yelp. OpenTable is especially cool because it tells you which restaurants have open reservations and lets you view their menus, and if you choose one of their suggested restaurants it will even book a reservation for you. If you need a ride to that restaurant? Try Uber or Lyft. Both apps let you request a “ride-share” car and driver at the touch of a button. You can even track the driver’s progress as he or she approaches your location. And if you want to finish off your evening with a paid-for sexual encounter? Well, there are apps for that as well.
Yes, that’s right, there are hire-a-hooker apps!
As a therapist who specializes in the treatment of sexual compulsivity and other intimacy disorders, this doesn’t exactly surprise me. After all, adult friend finder (i.e., casual sex finder) apps like Tinder and Grindr have been around for several years. Furthermore, the Internet, in general, has long been an open-source supplier of porn and sexual adventuring, with websites like Craigslist and Backpage blatantly catering to the sex industry. Heck, I even remember (far too vividly) the pre-Internet era when “escort ads” appeared in the personals sections of certain newspapers and magazines. But now we have smartphone apps that let you order up sex-for-hire like sandwiches from Jimmy John’s, and somehow I can’t help but feel we’ve crossed a line.
Prior to writing this post, I did a quick online search for “escort apps” and several popped up. So far it appears these apps are geared primarily toward straight men seeking sex with female prostitutes, but products designed for straight women, gays, lesbians, bisexuals, fetishists and the like will certainly be here soon. Until then, we’ve got Utoopi, SugarSugar, The Gentlemen’s Navigator and a few others. (Don’t blame me for the bad branding. I didn’t name them, I just found them.) So below, I’m sorry to say, are a few of the latest prostitute-finder apps.
I don’t know for sure, but I’m guessing these apps skim a percentage of any payments received by the sex worker (a la Uber and Lyft, where the app automatically deducts a percentage of the ride-share driver’s fee). So voila, we now have digital pimping! And it’s hardly a leap to envision a rating system similar to those used on restaurant apps, ride-share apps and all sorts of other apps.
Honestly, I don’t know why I’m troubled by the advent of prostitution apps. After all, prostitution has been around since man first discovered the joys of sexual activity. It was only a matter of time before app developers decided to fuse modern technology with the world’s oldest profession. Perhaps I’m just old-fashioned. Or maybe I’m worried that my sexually compulsive clients will now go even further off the rails with their behavior – even though I know they’re no more or less likely to be hiring prostitutes now than they were a few years ago.
So how are we really affected by the fact that that prostitutes now hang out on smartphone apps instead of street corners? For one thing, there is much less hue and cry about the world’s oldest profession. Out of sight, out of mind, it seems. As such, both prostitutes and those who hire them are much less likely to be arrested. Certainly police can still run stings by posing online as either prostitutes or johns, but for the most part, it seems as if law enforcement has realized this task is a losing battle that’s not worth fighting. So I suppose all this really means, in the big scheme of things, is that prostitution has, like pretty much everything else, gone digital, resulting in a new and somewhat safer venue.
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It can be really daunting to seek out a sex worker if you’ve never done it before.
How do you know who’s going to be right for you? How do you negotiate payment? And is it even legal?
It can be really tricky knowing where to start, so to break it all down for you, sex worker Lucie Bee and Scarlett Alliance CEO Jules Kim join Nat in the studio.
There are so many reasons why someone might want to hire a sex worker.
Obviously, for the most part, the reason is: S-E-X. But clearly there’s a lot more to it than just that.
To chat through this topic, The Hook Up enlisted sex worker, activist and noted geek, Lucie Bee, and Jules Kim, CEO at Scarlet Alliance, Australia’s peak sex work organisation.
It can all be quite overwhelming, says Lucie. Before getting into the industry she had experience on the other end, when she was booking a sex worker for herself. She finds that one of the issues can be that there’s “so much variety”. It can be hard to know what to look for and how exactly to choose.
But she does recommend starting off with a search to find the best provider for you: “Google where you are and who you want to meet. If you’re after a specific service — kink, for example — then maybe more of a refined keyword search is the way to go.”
Then you’ve got to go deep. “Obviously photos are the first thing that are going to give you an indicator, or might be the first reason you click on a profile, but beyond that it’s just really important to just have a read through because we are literally giving you a guide about how to get the best out of your booking.”
There are so many rules around advertising when it comes to sex work that it can be quite hard to decifer. “Unfortunately a lot of the rules and laws are quite ridiculous and are fairly arbitrary and vary state-by-state,” says Jules. “That is where a lot of that online advertising has provided a certain degree of freedom.” But there are still certain words that can’t be used and descriptions will need to be “a bit veiled.”
“For me, a lot of [research] would be going on social media,” says Lucie. “I think you can get a really good vibe and see people and the way they interact with other workers. And see if other workers are promoting them as well.”
Ideally you want everyone to feel good about the experience. While you're booking, think of it like any other appointment you’d be making and consider how you would talk to any other human. And then, when it comes to the booking itself, pay attention to what the worker is saying and asking of you.
Most importantly, both you and the workers need to feel safe and usually they will have been clear about their expectations and boundaries. “We’re not trying to be the fun police,” says Lucie. “We are definitely here for the fun and we want to make sure that we get to the fun as quickly as we can but there’s a few things that we have to consider as providers and that you should also consider going into it. And if everyone’s treating each other with respect — the same way you would a service provider in any other industry — then you’re gonna have a good time.”
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According to Lucie a lot of workers will tour rurally. “I know a lot of this stuff is done online but you can check the classifieds,” recommends Lucie. “A lot of workers who are travelling rurally will advertise in the classifieds and a lot of different advertising sites are broadening and making it so we can list our tours when we’re going to places that are a little bit off the beaten track.”
“There’s also nothing wrong with having a look around and seeing if there’s a worker who goes to places in and around your area and just saying, Hey, I’d love to see you around here sometime. Or asking if they know anyone who does go there. Sometimes they’ll answer your question, sometimes they might ask you to do your own research. But if you’re very polite and nice with your request, people will do what they can to help you. And it’s nice to know where people want to see us.”
A question came through from the textline, about whether you can see a sex worker without sex being the end goal. “I do a lot of that,” says Lucie. “A lot of workers will list that they’ve got companionship rates and stuff like that.”
“I’ve been fortunate enough to travel and go on some really cool adventures with some of my clients. I’ve also been fortunate to just hang out and do really atrociously nerdy shit with some of my clients and it’s great. So, if you have an interest and you have a worker who shares that interest, then by all means get in contact and ask. Or have a look and see if they’ve got those rates because that’s totally a thing.”
It’s usually a bit of both, says Jules. “There is no set price across the industry. It depends on the individual sex worker and what services they provide. Usually it will go on both the time of the booking and the services provided.” Also, travel costs can come into play.
Lucie agrees: “Usually people will book me for a certain amount of time and my rate will be based on that but there’s a few extra things that I have on my list. Most of my services are all inclusive but I do a lot of fun, quirky costume kind of stuff — that requires a bit more preparation on my part, so that might be an extra and there might be a little bit of an added rate for that.”
“We’re not a hive mind. Each of us has our own set way that we price and go from there.”
So how do you actually exchange the money? According to Jules, “Again, it varies between the service providers. Some might have facilities to take those payments in advance of the booking but usually that’s all negotiated up front.” For the most part, everything relevant should be spoken about in advance - the boundaries for both the worker and the client, what services are happening and how much it will all cost. The only exceptions would be for appointment extensions, if possible, and then tips would come after the booking, if they’re going to come at all.
When it comes to sex work in Australia, laws are set by State and Territory Governments. Meaning, something may or may not be illegal depending where you are.
As it stands, NSW is the only state to have decriminalised sex work. ACT and the Northern Territory have adopted partial decriminalisation and there are pushes across all states towards complete decrimalisation. In recent years there have been changes to advertising regulations in both Queensland and Victoria. And in June, a sex work decriminalisation bill passed Upper House of the South Australian Parliament .
Then, of course, there are different laws depending on whether it's brothel, private, escort or street-based sex work, and when it comes to things like condom use.
Decriminalistation across the board would make a massive difference to sex workers, says Jules. “It means that sex workers have rights, are able to demand certain working conditions and seek retribution if those are not met. So, there’d be an expectatio
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