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Vanessa Chalmers, Digital Health Reporter
A MUM has shared a masturbation tip for her teenage son to help him learn the importance of safe sex.
Her “controversial” and honest advice went viral on TikTok, receiving the support of nearly half a million likes.
The Minnesota-based mum-of-three, who goes by “Shug”, started the video by telling people: “I'm going to say something a little controversial, but I promise it makes sense, so hear me out.”
She continues: “We all know that it's normal, natural, and healthy for kids to explore their bodies, right? But for people who have a penis or are penis-adjacent, that exploration changes when they hit puberty. 
“And that exploration can need a little bit of clean-up. 
“I know, I know there's all the tropes about lotion and Kleenex and crispy towels and gym socks and whatever. But hear me out.
"What if — because we are trying to encourage safe sex practices — we give people things that provide protection. Like CONDOMS! 
“Think of it. Easy clean-up, they learn how to put them on, and they get used to what they feel like. So there's never any discomfort when they do become ready to go with a partner. 
“What a magical world where a person with a penis, their first instinct when they become aroused is to grab protection."
Followers commented the method was “beautiful logic” and “genius” for helping youngsters get used to condoms - which are crucial for avoiding STIs.
But one raised concern over cost, saying “some (pre)teens would use several a day”.
Shug is mum to three kids who she nicknames Bugga (14), Turkey (seven) and Goo (four) on social media to protect their privacy.
Her adoring fans love her videos which cover how she approaches tricky conversations with her children, including about sex.
In her most popular - with 11 million views and three million likes - Shug records a conversation in which she explains to her seven-year-old why he is not yet old enough to listen in on conversations with her teenage son.
When asked about her video about masturbation using a condom, Shug told Buzzfeed about 80 per cent of people had a positive reaction.
She said: “The goal with providing condoms for use during their self-exploration is to help habituate the use of protection during pleasurable activities…
“When it comes to the idea of encouraging condom use for self-exploration, I cannot take all the credit for thinking of the idea. 
“My sister and I both have pubescent children and have spent time discussing the developmental and biological needs that they will face as they grow. 
“We have talked at length about how to protect them emotionally and physically.”
The straight-talking mum is keen to normalise “self-exploration and discussions about sex” in order to give them a healthy view of sex.
She also hopes it will veer them away from learning about sex from other sources. 
Although Shug's videos are aimed at parents, she has received “heartbreaking and inspiring messages” from kids around the world.
“They tell me about how they have been shamed for asking questions, or how they have been afraid to confirm the (often seriously erroneous) information they’ve gotten elsewhere for fear of judgment from their families”, Shug said.
With a huge backing, Shug announced yesterday she is on track to release a book.
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14 Times Your Favorite Female Celebrities Addressed Masturbation
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Preparing to take the stage, Queen of Pop Madonna was threatened with arrest by police enforcement if she chose to simulate masturbation during her performance at the SkyDome in Toronto. The year was 1990. She did it anyway. Flash-forward a quarter century, and the topic of female self-love is taking the limelight, with artists demanding respect for the way they choose to enjoy their bodies and express their sexuality.
In 2008, the hit CW television show Gossip Girl shocked fans by alluding to masturbation by a minor in a scene featuring character Blair Waldorf fantasizing about Chuck Bass. The same network pushed the envelope again in 2013, when Reign’s Kenna took to the stairwell to pleasure herself beneath her dress after becoming excited.
For the latest installment of Degrassi, executive producer Stephen Stohn revealed that the current season will have a storyline about self-love. “This year, we can tell stories about female masturbation,” he told Hollywood Reporter. “Our motto really is: 'If they’re talking about it in the hallways in the schools around the nation, we need to be talking about it on the air.'”
But your favorite characters on TV aren't the only ones exploring the topic — celebrities are finding all kinds of ways to celebrate female sexuality.
“A masturbate a day keeps the haters away,” Miley Cyrus, founder of the Happy Hippie Foundation, captioned an Instagram photo of a woman with her hands in her pants. The singer’s 2014 music video, “Adore You,” featured her touching herself in bed while dressed in lingerie.
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While the art of crotch grabbing on stage has been common practice among men, especially rappers, for decades, powerful female artists such as Beyoncé, Rihanna, Kesha, and Katy Perry are boldly claiming the move, making the silent statement that women are sexual creatures, too.
“Oh, what an ordinary day / take out the garbage, masturbate,” sings Annie Clark of St. Vincent in “Birth in Reverse.” The artist, who says the song is about squalor being mixed with beauty and the mundane, told Under the Radar magazine she played the song for her best friend and he laughed and joked that taking out the garbage was the only thing in the song she wouldn’t actually do.
“I think women should equally be allowed to pleasure themselves as much as men,” said Taylor Momsen of The Pretty Reckless in a 2012 interview. “I think that if that has any more controversy than a man talking about pleasuring himself, then there's something wrong with the world.”
The rock star, who was called a slew of vulgar names after she joked that her vibrator was her best friend at age 16, says, “I'm not a whore for masturbating.”
Rihanna was spotted rocking a Do It Yourself (DIY) masturbation-themed T-shirt from Another Enemy in May 2013. The previous year, the singer quote-retweeted, “May is National Masturbation Month,” adding, “more like 2012.”
Rihanna isn’t the only celebrity who has made masturbation jokes on social media. Also in 2013, Actress Anna Kendrick tweeted, “Ugh — NEVER going to a Ryan Gosling movie in a theater again. Apparently masturbating in the back row is still considered 'inappropriate.'"
While “Feeling Myself” by Nicki Minaj ft. Beyoncé is more focused on metaphorical self-love, it is full of double entendre — from the song title itself to lines such as “I'm feelin' myself, jack rabbit,” which can be interpreted as a reference to the widely popular vibrator featured on Sex and the City.
“Gonna love myself, no, I don't need anybody else,” sings Hailee Steinfeld in her “Love Myself” music video, rocking a onesie that reads “SELF SERVICE.”
YouTuber Hannah Witton, 24, of London, said she was thrilled when a season one episode of Girls depicted Marnie as being so turned on she ran to a public toilet to masturbate.
Hannah, who recently posted a video encouraging girls to get to know their vaginas, says even her mom’s encouragement to explore her own body through masturbation wasn’t enough to counteract the negative stigma placed on it by society.
“When I was in school people thought you were weird if you were a boy and didn't masturbate,” she says. “And they also thought you were weird if you were a girl and you did masturbate.”
More and more, we are seeing empowered women take back the narrative of female pleasure and sexuality, which is a win for women everywhere. The secret is officially out: everybody masturbates, and that's okay.
The young person’s guide to conquering (and saving) the world. Teen Vogue covers the latest in celebrity news, politics, fashion, beauty, wellness, lifestyle, and entertainment.
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