Hard Thrusting

Hard Thrusting

Copyright 2022 © Intimacy in Marriage
I’m often touting the deep need for healthy communication between a husband and wife about sex. (Well, about all things, but let’s stay on point here with sex).
Without good communication— solid listening and feedback and verbal expression of feelings and thoughts —a married couple is left to rely on assumption to navigate their sexual way.
Assumption does not lay down a solid track to phenomenal sex. It just doesn’t. It’s not hard to see why a married couple would be left sexually disappointed if the only tool with which they are working is assumption.
All penetration and thrusting are not created equal. You don’t have to have sex more than about once to know this, but it still is something a husband and wife may not intentionally talk about. Like ever .
They fall into patterns of “this is just how we do it,” and either it doesn’t occur to them to speak up about what may make the experience more enjoyable for each of them OR they are hesitant to speak up out of concern of implying that their spouse doesn’t know what they are doing.
But maybe they don’t know what they are doing. That’s not a bad thing. It just a revelatory thing. It’s a clue that some coaching may be in order.
Just like all aspects of sexual arousal and pleasure, a fair amount of communication can go a long way. Through giving and receiving feedback and through trial and error, you can better use penetration and thrusting.
Yes, as a husband, your penis is what is penetrating and thrusting in your wife’s vagina. But both of you are participants in those actions.
Well, by right , I don’t mean 90 degrees. I mean there is more than one angle when it comes to intercourse, and the most phenomenal lovemaking incorporates at least a few, that’s for sure!
The angle at which the penis is going in and out of the vagina matters. Some angles are more enjoyable and some can be painful. Key here is try different angles to see what brings about more pleasurable sensations for both of you.
As a woman, your husband’s penis will likely stimulate your clitoris more pleasurably if the shaft of his erect penis is in more direct contact with your clitoris (as opposed to his penis sliding back and forth under it but not on it).
Angle also can determine how well the head of the penis is stimulating the wife’s G-Spot. Various angles also intensify stimulation of the penis in different ways, making sex more pleasurable for a husband.
So how do you try out different angles? Varying positions is one of the best ways, as well as making slight adjustments within each position.
For example, the wife on top gives her a lot of control in determining the angle at which the penis is coming in and out of her vagina. A wife can be on top facing her husband (often referred to as cowgirl) or facing away from him (often referred to as reverse cowgirl). Both allow various penetration angles.
During missionary position, you can adjust angles with a pillow under the wife’s hips or by the husband moving forward so his chest may be more aligned with his wife’s face, as opposed to them being face-to-face.
The husband entering his wife’s vagina from behind also gives them angles that are quite stimulating. Some women particularly find this position stimulates their G-Spot.
There are so many sexual positions that afford you various angles for penetration and thrusting. You won’t know until you experiment a bit and see what you each enjoy.
As a husband, how deep are you penetrating your wife? Have the two of you talked about what you each enjoy? Incredibly deep penetration can be quite arousing for both a husband and a wife. Or it may be painful (particularly for the wife).
Key here is to find the threshold between what is optimal depth without something becoming painful.
And let’s not assume there is no value to shallow penetration being included as well.
In fact, varying the depth throughout a lovemaking session can be quite tantalizing. Arousal and pleasure can build as a husband varies how deep he is penetrating his wife; sometimes shallow, sometimes a little deeper and sometimes very deep.
As I have mentioned a bazillion times, communication is key. Tell each other what feels good. Show each other what feels good.
It’s not unusual as a husband’s arousal is increasing that he wants to go deeper. And it’s not unusual that as a wife feels her husband’s penis within her and her pleasure increasing, she may want him to go deeper, possibly even expressing this by pulling him deeper into her or demanding he go deeper.
Great sex happens in the shallow and in the deep. Learn from each other how to adjust and appreciate various depths to the fullest.
Rate matters. The rhythm and speed at which a husband moves his penis in and out of his wife’s vagina— or how she moves him in and out of her, if she is on top —has a dramatic effect on the sexual pleasure and climax they each experience.
As with everything we have talked about thus far, this really comes down to preference and communication. I will say, though, that I think varying the rate, especially early in a lovemaking session, can enhance arousal and pleasure. It’s kind of like teasing, but in a good way—how a husband can oscillate between speeding up and slowing down.
Yes, of course, there likely will reach a point where the desire to go faster is what you both need to climax hard. But getting to that point affords you room and opportunity to vary your rate. Think of a lovemaking session loosely as both a marathon and a sprint.
Copyright 2020, Julie Sibert. Intimacy in Marriage Blog. Links may be monetized.
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I want to keep championing you Julie to encourage us readers to keep those vital communication lines open. Sadly, for my wife and I, we waited far too long before we really started to talk honestly about our sex life, our likes and dislikes and to even talk about the matter of sexual penetration and thrusting. Now, we talk freely and openly and it really had made a great difference to our sex life – even though there hasn’t been a lot of change in our positions or sexual activity. We encourage each other during sex and after sex, we discuss what just happened, what was nice, what was different and what didn’t quite work out. We no longer take sex so “seriously” but are learning to laugh at those things that didn’t work.
We’ve learnt what works and mix things up slightly to add variation. Sadly, because of our age, taking up “challenging” positions really are not on the menu for us and we’re okay with that. Add in my wife’s battle with cancer and the resultant lymphedema and different positions become even more limiting and challenging. But, we are both very determined (and stubborn!) people and so we are still working out what works best and enjoying the process. It really is a learning journey. We still keep experimenting (as long as our bodies allow us too!), trying new things just to see if it adds more fun and more pleasure to our sexual journey and life together. Reading blogs (like yours) help us explore more. We often discuss what we’ve read and if we haven’t tried what was written then we get to work to try it out. It’s all part of the fun!!
Julie, thank you so much for addressing this topic! I prefer this type of topic over any other, as it really gets to the heart of the matter when it comes to sex.
First of all, I just love the word. It’s both a noun and a verb, and such a descriptive word, too. Beyond that, I think thrusting is the essence of great sex, and while a seemingly simple act, it has many variants as you wisely noted.
Second of all, I echo each of the points you said. Rate and pace does matter. Communication is key here, as you said, and the pace can differ depending on position, too, or even the mood of the moment. In my case, I prefer an aggressive pace, especially when getting pounded doggy style.
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2 Thrusting Techniques That Drive Her Wild in Bed

MLA Style Citation:

Grave, Jack "2 Thrusting Techniques That Drive Her Wild in Bed."
2 Thrusting Techniques That Drive Her Wild in Bed .
16 Jul. 2010 EzineArticles.com.
11 Jul. 2022 < http://ezinearticles.com/?2-Thrusting-Techniques-That-Drive-Her-Wild-in-Bed&id=4680070 >.

APA Style Citation:

Grave, J. (2010, July 16). 2 Thrusting Techniques That Drive Her Wild in Bed .
Retrieved July 11, 2022, from http://ezinearticles.com/?2-Thrusting-Techniques-That-Drive-Her-Wild-in-Bed&id=4680070

Chicago Style Citation:

Grave, Jack "2 Thrusting Techniques That Drive Her Wild in Bed." 2 Thrusting Techniques That Drive Her Wild in Bed
EzineArticles.com . http://ezinearticles.com/?2-Thrusting-Techniques-That-Drive-Her-Wild-in-Bed&id=4680070

By
Jack Grave |

Submitted On July 16, 2010

This probably won't come as a surprise to you, but almost no guys take the time to think about the thrusting techniques they use during sex.
I remember when I was having sex, before I learned all the "cool tricks" and ways to give women multiple orgasms, I never used to think about my thrusting techniques.
And if I did somehow think about how I was thrusting I just assumed "it probably doesn't matter how i'm thrusting anyway"...
One of the things I discovered on my "journey" to becoming a great lover is that the thrusting techniques you use during sex can make the difference between her orgasming 3+ times or her feeling nothing.
So if you take nothing away from reading this but one thing then let it be this.
Experiment with different thrusting techniques every time you have sex.
As soon as you start consistently experimenting, suddenly you'll be shocked when you come across a few different thrusting techniques that drive her wild.
And as you keep experimenting you'll discover more and more great thrusting techniques, and eventually you'll have a nice collection of thrusting techniques you can pick from every time you have sex that you know will get her to orgasm.
Now let me get a bit clearer about what exactly I mean by "thrusting techniques that drive her wild".
Thrusting techniques are how you thrust your penis in and out during sex.
Most men opt for the fast, all in and all out approach with no change of rhythm, speed, depth or timing.
Start mixing up the rhythm, speed, depth and timing of your thrusting.
Go fast for a bit, then go slow for a bit.
Go deep for a bit, then shallow for a bit.
But you can also get a bit more advanced than this...
So here are two examples of some slightly more advanced thrusting techniques you can try out or get ideas from...
1 - slowly increasing depth and speed
women love build-up, teasing and anticipation.
You sticking your "thing" in full depth as soon as you start sex is not any woman's idea of a good time (unless you've already got a history of raw physical attraction and exceptional pleasure giving, in which case you can break the rules now and again).
Like I said, women like to be teased.
So one great thrusting technique for this is to start off sex by entering your penis into her vagina at an absolute minimal depth and very slowly.
Then next time enter very slightly deeper and very slightly faster.
And repeat the process getting gradually deeper and faster.
Overall it's a fairly slow process and it should take several minutes until you're in full depth.
And because of all the teasing and anticipation you created, she'll appreciate your deep thrusting 10x more than if you started full depth straight away.
2 - slow and shallow with the occasional slow deep thrust
this is another great thrusting technique for getting her to appreciate your deep thrust.
If you do this right you can experience her gasp when you go in deep.
How this one works is pretty simple.
Most of the time you'll be thrusting very shallow, roughly an inch or two in depth.
Then every now and again, like once for every 10 shallow thrusts, perform a very slow thrust to full depth.
Because of the contrast to all the shallow thrusts she's just experienced she will love the feeling of you going in all the way.
And remember to just go in deep once and then return to doing 10 or so shallow thrusts before going deep again.
Two examples of different thrusting techniques.
There's an endless amount of ways you can vary your rhythm, speed, depth and timing while thrusting to create an incredible experience for her.
Watch the free video that reveals exactly how I went from lasting less than 10 seconds to over 35 minutes in bed, watch it at http://www.EjaculationGuru.com
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Don’t assume that all we want to do is “make love.” Women like hard and fast sex just as much as the slow and sensual kind. I think the stereotype stems from the fact that a majority of female orgasms come from clitoral stimulation, which, depending on your body, can be easier to do through a grinding motion. Truly it comes down to the foreplay and the context. Looking for a five-minute quickie standing up by the kitchen counter? Energizer bunnies welcome. Hoping to get it on at the end of a long workday? Ease your way in there with some oral sex and slower penetration to start. But generally, keep that jackhammering to shorter bursts. Varying the speed makes the whole—ahem—shebang more exciting, anyways.
I’ll admit, updating the feed can be addicting. If she enjoys showing off her passions, I can’t blame her. But the constant photo shoots and on-the-go editing? It can drive your partner away. An intervention might be overkill, but you need to have a conversation about how it makes you feel. You can ask her to limit her app use around you, but she doesn’t have to go cold turkey. If it’s that important to her, share the sharing experience. Ever heard of an Instagram boyfriend—where you act as her de facto photographer? If you want no part of that, maybe she’s not your match.
Yes! The sexiest shows on TV right now pepper in plenty of scenes that could be considered soft-core porn. And it’s definitely an easy way to dip a toe in voyeurism. Is she into period clothing and romance? Start with Outlander on Starz. Want more drama? Binge The Affair on Showtime. Simply want a lot of sex scenes? Go for She’s Gotta Have It on Netflix. There’s always Game of Thrones, if you like your sex scenes to include bloodshed and overtones of incest.
It’s not fair when one partner feels like they’re carrying the weight, especially with something like housework. Talking about how to split it up fairly shows some initiative, but you know, it’s not really about the dusting. It’s more about equal contribution and appreciation. She might resent feeling like she has to play the nagging wife (or you the nagging husband). Best strategy is to get ahead of it. Be aware of her mental to-do list. That may mean asking her what’s on it. Something as simple as “Hey, what can I do for the house today?” will take you a long way.
A text has no context. Without your tone of voice or body-language cues, your coy responses might not translate in a chat bubble. Not saying you shouldn’t be flirty and funny in your texts, but it’s easy for a less direct message to miss the mark. In the first few weeks, use texting to set up your IRL dates, offer some insights about your interests, and let her know you’re thinking about her. You don’t have to play games, but less is still more.
The scheduling isn’t just about regularly getting off (although hopefully it does that, too). It’s about creating the anticipation of sex, which can be a huge turn-on, or at least a good way to throw a little gas on long-burning embers. Don’t put too much pressure on the dates you decide on, because the last thing you want is her to be dreading it or annoyed by your persistence. Start small. Kiss her on your/her way out the door tomorrow and say, “Are you free tonight? Let’s plan on having some fun.”

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Gabrielle Kassel is a New York-based sex and wellness writer and CrossFit Level 1 Trainer.

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Sex toys can do all sorts of things: vibrate, buzz, suction, pump….and thrust. Really!
Often known as thrusting vibrators, “a thruster is a penetrative toy that uses a motor to move in and out,” says sex educator Marla Renee Stewart, sexpert for Lovers , an adult wellness brand and store. More specifically, thrusters are designed to penetrate the vagina or anus, similar to how a penis or strap-on dildo would during penetrative intercourse. The point of these pleasure products? Hands-free and/or partner-free penetration.
To use a thruster, simply turn the device on, position it in front of the desired entry point, and enjoy! “This frees up your hands for other things like stimulating your nipples, using a clitoral vibrator , or sexting a partner,” says
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