Guys Fingering Their Ass

Guys Fingering Their Ass
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It's time to take your pleasure up a notch.
In 2020, anal play is on the menu. By now, we know that liking butt stuff has nothing to do with gender or sexual orientation, and everything to do with achieving earth-shattering pleasure. This is thanks in large part to the prostate , a walnut-sized gland located two to three inches inside the anus that is jam-packed with nerve endings, making internal stimulation feel heavenly. When you ejaculate with something in your rear end, you typically end up having a much stronger, full-body orgasm that puts regular penile orgasms to shame.
Even though they don't have a prostate, women can also immensely enjoy anal stimulation because the rectum and anus are chock-full of nerve endings. Additionally, it’s possible to stimulate the internal clitoris through the back door. The so-called G-spot (located on the front wall of the vagina) and the A-spot (also on the front wall, but closer to the cervix) are both reachable through anal penetration .
One of the best ways to get the booty involved during sex is to engage in anal fingering, which is exactly what it sounds like: inserting one or multiple fingers inside the anus to enhance sexual pleasure. While sex toys such as prostate massagers , butt plugs , and dildos can all stimulate the inside of one's behind, anal fingering can more directly hit the prostate or the internal clitoris through the rectum. (Think about it: You can wiggle your fingers, but you can’t wiggle a butt plug.)
But there's an art to anal fingering. You can’t just go ahead and ram your digits inside your or your partner's behind. Do that, and you're going to cause—or experience—a world of pain. To learn how to anal finger correctly so that it’s both safe and pleasurable, we reached out to sex and pleasure educator Luna Matatas and Dr. Evan Golstein , founder and CEO of Bespoke Surgical and The Future Method . Here are their expert tips on positions and techniques that will help you finger like a pro.
If you’re the top (i.e., the person doing the fingering), you need to cut your nails hella short and file them. If your nails are long or jagged, you can accidentally scratch or tear the inner walls of the rectum. “This will not only be painful, but it can also lead to issues like hemorrhoids or infections,” Goldstein says.
If you’re the bottom (i.e., the person getting fingered), you want to make sure your anus is clean. How thoroughly you clean will depend on how much you plan to take. If you’re new to anal play, and your partner is just going to put in a pinky, you don’t need to wash your insides for 50 minutes. Just make sure you haven’t had a bowel movement in the past hour, and then go ahead and shower to wash your external anus with antibacterial soap.
If you plan on taking multiple fingers, or are using anal fingering as foreplay for anal sex involving a dildo or penis, then you should consider cleaning your rectum with an enema, douche, or shower hose . Remember that feces isn’t stored in the rectum. It’s stored in the intestines and then is pushed through the rectum when you defecate. So it’s not as “messy” as you likely think it is.
There are two traditional positions ideal for anal fingering. The first is when you’re on our stomach in a starfish or doggie-like position. The second is when you’re on your back with your legs up in the air.
“I recommend positions [like these] that give you or your partner a clear view of the hole,” Goldstein says. “If you can see it—and I mean all of it—then you have a better chance of understanding the angles and anatomy to make the experience most pleasurable.” It’s also easier for the top to finger from these positions without uncomfortably bending their wrist.
Lube is not optional when it comes to anal fingering. It’s mandatory, and no, spit does not cut it. You specifically want “long-lasting lubes like silicone-based or oil-based lubes,” Matatas says. Water-based lubes tend to dry out too quickly with anal play because the anus is not self-lubricating like the vagina is. You want to put lube both on your finger(s) and directly on and around the anus, Goldstein adds. Reapply lube generously and frequently as needed.
“The most common issue that can happen with anal fingering is tearing, otherwise known as anal fissures,” Goldstein says. This can happen when you thrust or insert too much too quickly. That’s why, before even starting with a finger, you should massage the external anus “as if you’re petting the butthole,” Matatas says. This helps the anal muscles relax.
After you’ve teased their hole with external play, you can insert a finger before eventually working your way up to two or more (if you ever reach that point). “Always be aware of your limitations,” Goldstein says. “No one is counting how many fingers you can take up your bum.”
Whatever you do, don’t start by quickly thrusting in and out. Instead, begin by inserting a third of your finger, then half, and then all of it. Once your finger is fully inside, let it rest there for a little without any movement. Let the anus get used to the sensation of having something inside of it.
“The anus doesn't only get pleasure from depth, so try moving your finger so you're massaging the sides of the anus in a horizontal motion,” Matatas says. And remember, the prostate is two to three inches inside your anus. That’s the money maker and what feels really good when stimulated. So you want to focus on that part of the region when fingering or getting fingered.
“Fingerplay should be more about gentle massaging, which will create better nerve stimulation in that region,” Goldstein adds. “The skin in this region is quite thin, so any jerky or sudden moves can cause significant tearing and trauma.” So really, you want massage as oppose to thrust .
Both Goldstein and Matatas make clear that there should be an open line of communication for the entire experience. If you’re the top, ask your partner if what you’re doing feels good. If you’re the bottom, don’t be afraid to tell your partner to reapply more lube or go slower. With anal fingering, as with any new sexual experience, communication is crucial.
You want to wash your hands when you’re done with anal fingering. You can wait until you’re done with your sexual session except if you want to transition from anal fingering to vaginal fingering. You don’t want to transfer bacteria from the anus to the vagina, Matatas says. So in that situation, you want to wash your hands before touching your partner’s vagina.
It's an intense experience to have something inside of you, especially if you never have before. If you were the top, check-in with your partner after the sexual experience to see how they’re feeling and if there’s anything you can do to support them.

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MetroUK
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Hattie Gladwell Wednesday 19 Apr 2017 4:21 pm
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Everyone has their own sexual desires – but not everyone likes to talk about them, feeling ashamed or embarrassed, worried that they may be judged.
But in reality, loads of us share the same sexual desires. We don’t realise this because we’re not openly talking about them.
One sexual desire, for many men, is for a finger to be inserted into the anus. It makes perfect sense, as the ‘male G spot’ is located in a male’s prostate, which is behind the anal wall. When the prostate is stimulated, it can give a man incredible amounts of pleasure.
But still, putting a finger into a man’s bum can seem taboo because people still believe that any form of anal play says something about your sexuality – despite it just being another way to explore your body and all of its pleasurable areas
Whether you’re experimenting on your own or with a partner, it’s always great to find out what you enjoy or don’t enjoy to heighten your own sexual experiences – but how can we do this when we’re scared of liking something that we feel ashamed of?
To open the conversation around anal play, we spoke to six different men to see what they thought of their own bum-fingering experiences, whether they think it’s something everyone should give a try or if it’s something they believe to be a ‘taboo’.
See below for their incredibly honest (and incredibly NSFW) answers.
Tom: ‘I personally want mine left alone but I understand it can be a really sexual area for some guys.’
Mark: ‘It depends on the situation you’re in. I’m very open (so to speak) regarding sex, and I wouldn’t dismiss my arsehole being used in a sexual way at all…’
Henry: ‘Kind of sexual, I think men’s anuses are usually pretty grimmer than women’s though!’
Rheese: ‘I’m intrigued by the idea, never done anything about it though. Would like to see what the fuss is about, maybe when I’m intoxicated with my girlfriend sometime.’
Josh: ‘I was completely against anything going up my bum until not long after I got together with my current girlfriend. Long story short, we tried it but I get nothing from it.’
James: ‘Done right it can be very enjoyable. It can add pleasure and increase stimulation.’
Mark: ‘Not really… I’ve seen it in porn and carried on masturbating.. does that count?’
Tom: ‘I have definitely fantasised about it, everyone’s a little bit curious!’
James: ‘I wouldn’t say it’s a fantasy as it’s something I have already experienced. Would I do it again? Yes. Is it something I crave? No.’
Henry: ‘Yes, definitely! Experimented a bit but not too much.’
James: ‘Knowing what your partner wants is very important… I would not say it’s a first time kind of thing to ask someone either unless you chatted about it beforehand.
‘I think most women would run a mile if you turned round early on and said “jam a thumb up my ass will you love?”. I think communication is key on this matter.’
Henry: ‘My sexual partners are really open people like myself so things have always gotten a little weirder than just “butt stuff”. I’d feel completely comfortable suggesting when I felt like it.’
Rheese: ‘Talked about it with my girlfriend, I think I would be more comfortable having it done after a few drinks.’
Tom: ‘I don’t think my partner would ever suggest it so it would only happen if I asked.’
Mark: ‘I feel it’s something that i would be more inclined to do if suggested. Maybe if myself and a partner needed to spice up our sex lives.’
Josh: ‘The first time me and my partner did it was when she was giving me head and she gave the old rusty trombone. I let her do it all the way through to see if it was any different but I can’t say it did much for me.’
Henry: ‘The person I see was already performing oral sex (possibly the best head I’ve ever had) and just naturally worked from my shaft and balls further and further down until she had her tongue in my ass. Then she came up a little and continued with her finger.’
Tom: ‘I have had someone put a finger up there but it was a bit of a shock as it wasn’t planned/discussed.’
Mark: ‘I have. Pretty certain they put their tongue there first and then it went to fingering with NO discussion at all.. I didn’t decline of course.’
James: ‘It’s happened a few times. None of it was planned. The first time was while a lady was preforming oral sex while I was sat on a couch.
‘She moved her hand under the balls and started to just play around the anus with her finger. It was a small shock at the time but I kinda thought “Ok this is not so bad”. She then slowly worked it inside little by little.
‘It was very enjoyable and added to the pleasure of the moment. On the opposite side of the scale I have had a sexual partner just stick it up with no warning. Yeah that’s not as fun and hurt. It was soon removed.’
Mark: ‘Around 8… depends how much you’re “up for it”… it’s like rushing a poo I guess; it’s way more enjoyable if you take your time.’
Henry: ‘2/10. Others have tried since with you know, no moisture, and that was sore! Definitely recommend. Loved it.’
James: ‘I have enjoyed both sides of the scale. It’s been a good 1 and a bad 10. Just like a woman you don’t just jam it in.’
Tom: ‘I’d say about a 6 purely because I wasn’t ready at all!’
Josh: ‘At first it’s pretty uncomfortable but not really painful, I’d give it a 2/10. And yeah [I enjoyed it] but probably only because I was getting head at the same time.’
Tom: ‘I’d say a one-off, but if it was really enjoyable then why not regular!’
Mark: ‘It’s not something i think about. But i’d probably allow it again.’
Josh: ‘Probably not going to do it much more but she’s gone and bought a dildo just for it. She’s really into pegging.’
James: ‘If you do it all the time it will lose its taboo and sometimes it’s nice to have one or two special treats now and then. Again I think it all comes down to your partner.
‘If you jump from sexual partner to sexual partner then it’s hard to build up a sexual relationship with that person and knowing what they really want and enjoy.’
Henry: ‘Like every now and then yeah go for it. Couldn’t see it becoming an every time thing for sure. Change it up, have fun.’
Rheese: ‘Something I can imagine becoming a not so regular occurrence but happening once in a blue moon.’
Josh: ‘Yeah I don’t see why not. I mean, if I DID like it then I wouldn’t be ashamed to say it (given I wasn’t telling my parents or something).’
James: ‘Tough question… I think it all depends on who. A close friend who listens and is not judgmental, yeah, no issues… the lads down the pub, not so much.’
Henry: ‘I think a lot of people turn a little prude when it comes to talking about sex but I’m very honest – if someone asked I’d tell them! I’m just not particularly ashamed and my friends know I’ve done some disgusting things so a finger up my arse seems pretty weak in comparison.’
Rheese: ‘I talk about it openly with my ‘lad’ mates, we’ve got a G spot there for a reason so I may utilise it at some point is my reasoning.’
Tom: ‘I would admit to liking it, I couldn’t care less what people thought.’
Mark: ‘As I said, I’m very open. So I can’t say I don’t like it. Can be quite uncomfortable however.’
Henry: ‘God knows, some people don’t even like foreplay, they can do one!
‘I think it’s just the whole thing about it being an arsehole. Sh*t is grim and I guess some people can’t even bear the possibility of maybe getting a little on them.
‘Not that I’m into poo, I’m definitely not, but obviously if you’re jamming things up there you’ve gotta be comfortable with a possible consequence.’
Tom: ‘I think there’s just a huge stigma of it being “gay” to have a finger up the bum. I’ve never really understood this, if it feels good it feels good. I definitely think more people should give it a go, myself included!’
Josh: ‘Maybe men think it’s because only gay guys like sticking stuff up their arse or maybe because it wasn’t exactly covered in sex ed so anyone who does it is abnormal or weird… Everyone should try it at least once for sure!’
James: ‘I think men see anything up the bum as “gay”.. we are willing to stick it up a woman’s butt but if they do it to us it’s a “gay” thing to enjoy.
‘It’s bravado and cutting off your nose to spite your face. I always say if it feels good do it! Worst case it’s not for you and you know for the future.’
Mark: ‘Because they’re insecure and not comfortable with themselves or they just like to keep their personal quirks to themselves. If you spoke about all of your fantasies and quirky secrets, then it would kind of contradict having them in the first place right?’
Rheese: ‘Lads are intrigued by the idea of anal stimulation but I think it’s circumstantial. I can tell most my friends that I want my girlfriend to do it to me at some point but my slightly more conservative friends? No chance!
‘They would frown on it and make it out to be “gay”, when in reality that isn’t the case.’
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Mark: ‘Like pooing Twiglets backwards… yup.’
Henry: ‘A little foreign to be honest, kinda good, kinda awkward, not really comparable to any other sexual feeling on your body! But it really makes you blow!’
Josh:
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