Group Sex Mmf

Group Sex Mmf

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These dating-app red flags terrify women

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5/18/18

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The longer I am single, the stronger my promiscuous side gets.
With each bad date I have, I feel like my desire for an emotional connection with a lover lowers and lowers.
Maybe I have just come to that age (or realization) that I just don’t care. Maybe I’m jaded.
Whatever the reason, I feel less inclined to invest in someone emotionally at the moment. My search for a life partner has been abandoned for the time being.
But I still have other desires that need attention – sexual ones.
Surprisingly, these needs are hard to fulfill on Tinder so I downloaded the ultimate hook up app, Feeld .
I was now only searching for that one thing that most guys pretend they’re not exclusively seeking but actually are – sex. And I didn’t want to go through another second of awkward chit-chat to get it.
Feeld makes finding players for bedtime play that much easier. It’s the next level of online hook-up apps for open-minded singles and couples ready to satisfy their sexual appetite with threesomes, kinks and new erotic adventures.
This is what I discovered from using the app on my first date.
Unlike other apps, Feeld lets you take on an alter ego so you don’t have to disclose your real name. I found people on the app to be much more discreet about being there. After all, this is a place where people are seeking to fulfill their most taboo sexual fantasies. Not something you want prospective employers to be able to Google.
I decided to upload just one picture of myself with my face not completely obscured.
This was also due to the awkwardness of potentially seeing someone I knew also snooping around for a good time between the sheets.
Despite most main pictures being mysterious enough, listing your sexual appetite is anything but discreet. The profile allows you to give a brief bio and encourages you to share interests just like Tinder and Bumble.
It makes the other apps look like child’s play as the answers that came under the sub-header “desires” were anything but innocent.
The amount of sexual lingo used is endless. While browsing other profiles I frequently asked “Is this actually a thing?” – most notably when I saw a “Fifty Shades of Grey”-esique fetish taken too far with a desire of “Daddy dom (dominant)” listed (I shudder at the thought).
BDSM, submissive, dominant, kink, switch, wrestling, pet-play, biting and sensory experiences were just some of the other desires listed among profiles of people identifying themselves as either queer, polysexual, pansexual, heteroflexible, bisexual or straight.
It seemed like many people shared the common urge to explore threesome or group-sex activity with MMF (male, male, female), FFM (female, female, male) and swingers making regular appearances as desires listed.
Conversations started similarly to other dating apps with a casual hello. But thankfully the whole “What do you do?” “What are your hobbies?” type of talk was quickly shut down with chat turning sexual relatively quickly. I wasn’t looking for a partner in crime, rather someone I could commit naughty acts with.
After a few rounds of conservation about what exactly my Feeld Romeo was after, I decided to meet up with my polysexual match in a public place.
Naturally, I wanted to meet my potential new lover in a public place rather than going directly to his bedroom (safety first) so we chose the normal date standard rendezvous at a bar.
I was thrilled to discover that all the normal “dating” things I hated weren’t here. We knew why we were there and there was no need to “sell myself” to convince him I was fabulous and awesome enough to date.
We bypassed the usual nitty-gritty date talk and went straight into an open and frank discussion about our sexual preferences. I felt that there were no prejudices and I felt as comfortable talking about my desires as I would be talking about my favorite movie.
I told him I wanted to dress up in a vinyl outfit and be dominant. He spoke about his desire to try group sex. He had just come out of a long-term relationship where his sexual desires (he felt) were repressed.
He had told me the app had given him the freedom to meet with like-minded people just wanting to have fun without getting into anything too serious.
He also mentioned his openness to exploring being with a man although he had not ever done so previously – he was just curious.
We didn’t go home together that night, but we’ve set the date for next week. This time, no chat – it will be straight sex, no strings attached and I cannot wait.
It will be my first Feeld sex, but I can already tell it won’t be my last.
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The past decade has seen a remarkable shift toward acceptance of sexual expressions typically considered taboo, from Fifty Shades of Grey making BDSM a household word to open relationships and sex parties getting unprecedented and mostly positive mainstream media attention.
Yet, despite all this talk of kink, group sex, and polyamory — with no shortage of personal stories — we have never had any reliable data about what percentage of Americans have done these things or how many would do them, given the chance. Past studies that had asked these questions did not have representative samples, and past studies with nationally representative samples of the U.S. population had never asked about these naughtier and less common sexual behaviors.
With a new study published by Debbie Herbenick and colleagues in the journal PLOS ONE that uses a nationally representative sample of over 2,000 U.S. adults aged 18+, we no longer have to live in the dark when it comes to the prevalence and the appeal of 30+ different sexual behaviors, everything from wearing sexy lingerie to sexting to spanking.
The study itself is an absolute treasure trove of information, and is freely available online, so you are welcome to dive deep. In this post, I’m going to focus on sexual experiences involving more than two people: threesomes and group sex.
How many people have had a group sexual experience?
As you can see from the graph below, about 10% of women and 18% of men reported having had a threesome. (If you’re thinking those numbers don’t add up, they don’t have to – it’s possible that more threesomes involved two men and a woman than the other way around, or three men only.) These numbers may not be as high as the recent media coverage would have you believe, but 1 in 10 to almost 1 in five is actually quite a substantial minority of people.
The lifetime numbers for group sex — which I assume respondents interpreted as four or more people — were slightly lower: 6% of women and 12% of men.
While a nontrivial number of Americans had had threesomes and group sex at least once in their lives, however, it’s worth noting that these are not exactly a frequent occurrence in people’s lives: Fewer than 3% of both sexes had done them in the past year, and fewer than 1% in the past month. For most people, it seems, multiple-partner sex is part of sexual exploration and experimentation with specific partners or during specific life stages rather than a go-to behavior.
That certain life stages may be especially "experimental" was clear when looking at the different age groups. Among women, one age group stood out among all others: the 25- to 29-year-olds. Their recent and lifetime engagement in multiple-partner sex was notably higher than both older and younger women, and their lifetime prevalence equaled that of men (18% for threesomes; 12% for group sex).
Interestingly, despite the image of college-age youth as the wild ones, the 18- to 24-year-old women were as unlikely to have had multi-partner sex as were women over 70.
Among men, the 25- to 29-year-olds were also one of the most active age groups, but so were the younger men, and even the older age groups continued to experience threesomes and group sex at 2-3% per year well into their 70s and beyond.
All this suggests women might have a later start to this sexual exploration than men, and a shorter window of time during which they are open to it. It’s also possible that current generations of young adult women will continue to explore at higher rates than older generations even as they get older themselves, but we’d need to follow the same group of women over time to answer that question.
How many people think threesomes are hot?
Engagement in partnered sexual activities is constrained by people's ability to find willing partners-in-crime, and therefore not a great indicator of their inner desires and interests. Luckily, this study also asked participants about how appealing they found these multiple-partner sexual experiences.
On average, men found threesomes and group sex more appealing than did women. The graph below provides the exact breakdown regarding threesomes. The numbers for group sex were remarkably similar among women, whereas men were somewhat more excited about threesomes than group sex.
But, contrary to popular stereotypes, it’s not like most men were crazy about multiple-partner sex and most women were not. In fact, between 65% and 74% of men found threesomes and group sex unappealing, as did about 90% of women.
Of course, group sex comes in many different gender combinations (don’t forget there are more than two genders) and a major limitation of this study is not asking about the type of threesome people had or found appealing. Another major limitation is the entirely binary approach to gender, with no information about the behaviors and desires of transgender or gender non-binary folks.
You can find Dr. Zhana Vrangalova on Twitter , Facebook , Instagram , and at her website, drzhana.com .

“Should I tell her the truth or just let her believe our MMF threesome would be my first time with a guy?” Plus, dream interpretation.

by
Dan Savage
June 18th, 2020 July 22nd, 2021
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I’m a 32-year-old straight guy. My wife and I have been married for four years and together for nine. We have a great marriage and all is well. We have been quarantining at home since March. During this time, we have been exploring things sexually, which has been really fun. We have also been talking more about our kinks and fantasies. One thing my wife really wants to try is an MMF threesome. I’ve agreed and she’s been talking about how hot it will be to make this happen once quarantine is over. She is particularly turned on by the fact that this would be my first sexual experience with another guy. The only issue is, in reality, it won’t be. The truth is that when I was in high school, a guy friend and I fooled around a few times. I have no regrets but those experiences only served to reaffirm that I preferred women. I never did anything with another guy and I never felt the need to mention these early experiences to my wife. She just assumed I had never had a same-sex encounter. Now I feel like I’ve misled her or lied to her somehow. Should I tell her the truth or just let her believe our MMF threesome would be my first time with a guy? —Nervously Omitted Homosexual Occurrences, Mostly Oral
If your wife reads my column, NOHOMO, then you’ve just told her the truth, and the advice that follows is moot. So here’s hoping she doesn’t read my column: You don’t have to tell your wife about the handful/mouthful of times you messed around with another guy in high school. If you’re like most straight guys with one or two cocks in your past, NOHOMO, I’m guessing you didn’t tell the wife because you didn’t want her to feel insecure or spend all her free time corresponding with advice columnists about whether her husband is secretly gay.
In fairness to the wife, NOHOMO, not every woman whose straight-identified male partner admits to a little same-sex messing around worries her boyfriend or husband is going to leave her for a dude or all the dudes. But this worry is common enough to be something of cliché. A straight guy doesn’t even have to admit to having sucked one dick one time for his wife or girlfriend to worry he’s secretly gay; I get at least one letter every day from a woman who’s worried her husband is gay because he likes to have his nipples played with or his butt touched or because he has feelings. So while it’s not ideal that straight or mostly straight guys don’t feel they can be honest with their wives about their long ago and far away same-sex experimentation, NOHOMO, it’s understandable that many straight guys err on the side of keeping that shit to themselves.
But your question isn’t, “Why didn’t I tell her then?” but rather, “Should I tell her now?” And I don’t think you have to. She wasn’t harmed by this omission—you didn’t deprive her of information she was entitled to—and disclosing now would only serve to deprive her of something, i.e., the excitement she feels about being there to witness what she thinks is your first same-sex encounter. —Dan Savage
My wife questions my use of the word gay as being potentially offensive and I’d like to get your take. I’m male and my male friends like to flirt and joke about performing sex acts on each other. We’ve never actually carried through with it but I consider myself on the “spectrum” and might be open to gay sex. My male friends and I say we’re being or acting gay (though we’re all practicing heterosexuals) and this is where my wife takes issue. For example, I might say, “We’re so gay!” in our conversations but the word is used in a positive way. My wife makes the point that the word has a history of being used negatively, so may be considered offensive, and should only be used casually by people who are more legit gay. Should I stop using the word gay this way? —Gay Poser
Jesus, just suck off one of your male friends already—just get it over with—and then you have my permission to keep using “gay” as a compliment, GP. —DS
I’m a 35-year-old seemingly straight man, but in the past year—roughly corresponding with the longest sex drought in the history of my adulthood—I have had recurring wet dreams where I suck myself off. Probably a dozen or so of these dreams, all up, and I very much enjoy both sides of the transaction. What do you think it means? Am I witnessing the stirrings of some latent bisexuality or am I just desperate? Should I heed the call? —Originally Unilateral Regarding Oral But Oneiromancy Reveals Opening Sexuality
I usually don’t allow elaborate signoffs, OUROBOROS, but I’m making an exception for yours because it’s brilliant. (To save my other readers the trouble of Googling: “oneiromancy” is the interpretation of dreams to predict the future and an “ouroboros” is an image of a snake swallowing its own tail, often used as an infinity symbol.) That said, I’m not sure there’s really any call to heed here—other than a call to start doing the kind of stretching that would allow you to suck your own cock if you were able to get limber enough and your cock were long enough. But a desire to suck one’s own cock—or even an attempt, successful or not—doesn’t mean a man is latently bisexual or gay. I assume you’ve been masturbating for more than two decades, OUROBOROS, and just as there’s nothing gay about all those handjobs you’ve given yourself, there’s nothing gay about the blowjobs you can only dream about giving yourself. —DS
I’m that rare gay man who doesn’t like sucking dick. It wasn’t hard for my VGL husband to find guys who wanted to blow him before quarantine and for years I didn’t ask about it because I didn’t want to know the details. But I knew he had videos on his phone of some guys blowing him that he sometimes watched and I recently asked to watch one and I was completely shocked. It wasn’t just a blowjob. He spat in the guy’s face, called him homophobic names, and was just generally brutal. The intensity and violence wasn’t something I’ve ever detected in my husband or been on the receiving end from my husband. When I pressed my husband he shrugged and said, “That’s how a lot of guys like it.” I’m not sure what to do. —Gay And Gloomy Guy Extremely Disturbed
I read your letter three times and I still can’t tell whether you’re appalled or jealous. Do you disapprove of your husband treating someone that way or are you disappointed that your husband has never treated you that way? If it’s the former, well, don’t watch any more videos of your husband throat fucking his subby cocksuckers. If it’s the latter (and I suspect it is), GAGGED, then you’re going to need to figure out how to articulate that clearly—something you failed to do in your letter—so you can tell your husband you’d like it like that, too. Not being used for oral like that, of course, since you don’t like performing oral sex. But maybe you’d like anal like that? —DS
Dear readers: This is gonna feel a little weird stuck on the end of this week’s column, I realize,
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