Grandma Pregnant

Grandma Pregnant
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A selfless gran-to-be aged 51 is pregnant with her infertile daughter’s baby after offering to be her surrogate.
Cally Brooks / Health & Wellbeing / Updated 15.06.2020
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From IVF to egg freezing, sperm donations, and surrogacy, we meet the Beverly Hills doctor on the front line of fertility.
From IVF to egg freezing, sperm donations, and surrogacy, we meet the Beverly Hills doctor on the front line of fertility.
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A selfless gran-to-be aged 51 is pregnant with her infertile daughter’s baby after offering to be her surrogate.
Breanna Lockwood, 29, was thrilled when she found out mother, Julie Loving, 51, was pregnant with her child after four heart-wrenching years of trying for a baby with her husband, Aaron, 28.
The couple, from Chicago, Illinois, began trying for a baby after their wedding in July 2016 but were referred to a fertility clinic a year later after being unsuccessful in their attempts.
For more Health & Wellbeing related news and videos check out Health & Wellbeing >>
In the video below: What you need to know before undergoing IVF
After spending $73,000 on IVF, Breanna successfully fell pregnant twice but sadly lost both, including a set of twins.
This led to her developing Asherman syndrome - a rare condition causing scar tissue to develop inside her uterus meaning she was unable to carry another child.
“We were heartbroken, we had been trying for a child for two years and we thought we had finally got past the hardship and were on our way to having our miracle baby and then we found out we lost the twins,” Breanna said.
“We were told that we needed to pursue surrogacy as my uterus was unfit for pregnancy; I struggled mentally finding that out as I felt very unlucky.”
Julie, who works at a local supermarket, offered to carry her daughters baby - using Breanna and Aaron’s embryo - despite the chances being extremely low due to her age.
Julie had led a fit and healthy lifestyle -regularly competed in marathons and triathlons - and knew she’d be the best candidate for her daughter.
Breanna added: “She came to me when we were first trying for a baby using IVF and I didn’t take her seriously until 2019.
“My husband was on board, he was nervous because everyone wants to make sure it’s a healthy pregnancy but he trusts our fertility doctor so he was excited and amazed and thankful that she would do this for us.”
The age limit for some gestational carriers in the US is 35-years-old but despite Julie being 51-years-old, she passed all of her medical tests with flying colours.
In March 2020, Breanna, who works as a dental hygienist, and Aaron, a computer specialist, were delighted to find out Julie was successfully pregnant with her own grandchild after beginning the treatment in August 2019.
Dr Brian Kaplan, Breanna’s fertility doctor, said: ““This is obviously a very unique scenario and was done after very careful personalised medical, psychological and ethical considerations.
“Breanna and Aaron had undergone years of exhaustive treatment without success and there was clearly an underlying uterine etiology.
“Julie had an extensive work up and was considered uniquely healthy, which included completing marathons in her 40’s.
“We are all thrilled. The family dynamic, unconditional support and sacrifice and the resilience of the human spirit was humbling for me as a physician.”
Now, Breanna and Aaron are looking forward to welcoming their child in November and will find out the gender in the next few weeks.
She added: “The pregnancy is going extremely well, she has had very mild symptoms and she’s feeling great.
“She lives near us; we’re able to fully help her and go to all her appointments and help her with whatever she needs.
“Typically, I’m very private about my fertility struggles so I was nervous to announce it because it’s such a sensitive topic so it can be difficult. I was excited and nervous.
“I was going to be a mother no matter what happened; whether I got pregnant on my own, with IVF, through a gestational carrier or even adoption. I would remind myself that I was going to be a parent whichever path it took me”.
In the video below: Moment parents finally meet surrogate baby in Ukraine
By Courtney Roulston / What's For Dinner
By Courtney Roulston / What's For Dinner
By Courtney Roulston / What's For Dinner
By Courtney Roulston / What's For Dinner

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I met my pediatrician husband on an Internet dating site. He liked my profile, but he said that he was really hoping to have more children. He was 50 and I was a 49-year-old mother of three grown children—not to mention that I'd already become a grandmother! I thought a new baby wasn't likely to happen, so, longing to be just a few years younger, I wished him luck. Months later, though, he e-mailed again, imploring me to give him another chance. The issue of children, he said, we would leave to God.

We dated long-distance for six months, before we married in 2010 and I moved from New York to Michigan to be with him. Three years later, God gave us an answer: I became a 53-year-old who was pregnant with twins.

A year into our marriage, I consulted with a doctor who told me it could happen, because I was "young for my age." For my husband and me—both divorced, and with six children between us, ranging in age from 16 to 27—the option to reinvent was intriguing. And with our collective physical, emotional and intellectual resources, we felt more competent than ever to be parents. For us, hindsight has yielded a better handle on how early childhood experiences and consistent parenting might influence development later in life. Plus, this time we'd have each other.

It didn't take very long for us to learn a new acronym: BFP (Big Fat Positive) on our pregnancy test. Soon after, I had an ultrasound. "There's the heartbeat!" the tech pointed out, corroborating what I already knew. "And there's the other one."

"You didn't know you were having twins?" she asked me.

"No." My son, daughter-in-law, and grandson were visiting and I knew if I went home, I wouldn't be able to contain the news. I wanted my husband to be the first to know, so I ran to his office, darting between patients. Closing the door to his office, I showed him the ultrasound pictures marked TWIN A and TWIN B. His jaw dropped. "Are you sure?" I nodded. He was scared, but delighted.

Having twins propelled me from what had been a moderately high-risk pregnancy, because of my age, into a definitely high-risk pregnancy, because carrying twins can be difficult. The doctor visits were more frequent and the tests more thorough. The good news is that I have enough ultrasound images of these children to fill an album!

As it became obvious that my "middle-age spread" was turning into a bump, we began to leak the news. Reactions were mixed, especially among our children. One child laughed until she cried, then laughed again and cried some more. Another felt angry and rejected. One child seemed eager to teach our babies ice hockey and lacrosse. My oldest son, a lawyer, was concerned about how we would provide for the babies in case something happened to us. I assured him that we had plans in place—and even asked him to be part of those plans. My 3-year-old grandson just wanted to know when his uncles or aunts would be ready for a playdate.

Eventually, we began to tell our friends. Most friends our age were marrying off their children, enjoying their grandchildren, and talking about retiring to warmer places. As they downsized, we were upsizing, buying cribs and changing tables, setting up a nursery, car seats, and bouncy chairs—all in duplicate. Even though it was odd for some of the grandmothers—as well as some of the girls my daughter-in-law's age—to get used to treating us as new parents, their excitement matched ours.

The home I so carefully decorated with doodads, knick-knacks and glass tables radically changed to accommodate babies, then toddlers and (yikes) teenagers. We began thinking about schools and I begged advice from women barely older than my own children about breast pumps and local resources. And as I ran back and forth to New York to check on my frail and aging parents, I prayed that I will be able to effectively care for them as I jumped back on the mommy track. Life has become a weave of interesting challenges.

When the doctor first told me I'm younger than my age, I thought he was being funny. I had all the aches and pains of a middle-aged woman trying to keep up with life as it flew by. But, weirdly, the transition to carrying a baby again made me feel younger and stronger—even as I entered the late stage of pregnancy. It could have been the rush of hormones surging through my system, or the eagerness to once again nurse and nurture newborn babies. Perhaps it was the excitement of having twins. Or maybe it's just the novel anticipation of starting over with someone that I'm committed to and love so much, and the wonder of learning that reinvention is possible at every stage of life.

Update: On February 15, 2013, Judith gave birth to twin boys!

Judith S. Lederman is the author of The Ups & Downs of Raising a Bipolar Child and Joining the Thin Club .

Copyright © 2013 Meredith Corporation.

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