Girls Asshole Fingering

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Girls Asshole Fingering
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Nearly half of you told us you LOVE a finger in the bum during sex! 
So we’re going to find everything you need to know about how to do it properly - and why for guys or people with prostates, it might be the best orgasm you ever have.
For questions or topic suggestions email thehookup@abc.net.au or dm us @triplejthehookup
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A finger in the bum can make you cum, a finger in the bum is so much fun.
If you've clicked on this article you're either curious about anal fingering, a fan of butt play or a huge Dr. Seuss fan, and in that case I'm sorry.
Let's be real, over the past few years, ass play has become a pretty popular item on the menu. But if you're not keen on doing anal, or eating someone out - using a finger can be a great way to ease into it.
Also for guys or people with prostates it can apparently be one of the best orgasms of your life, all thanks to a lil' nugget of gold called the prostate aka p-spot.
Who knew digging for treasure could open a world of pleasure?
You know we love an investigation here at The Hook Up so, we asked you on our Instagram if you liked a finger in the bum during sex, and 46% of you said you loved it. We also asked cis straight men specifically if they were into it and over half of you said yes. BUT nearly 60% of you said you were too embarrassed to ask for it.
Here's what some of you dm'd us saying:
Whether someone asked you to do it, or you're keen to have someone do it to you, here's everything you need to know about anal fingering.
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Most people who dm'd us saying they used their fingers to dabble in a bit of ass play, gave glowing reviews. Some even went as far to say "best orgasm of my life." So why does it feel so good? According to Men's Sex Coach Cam Fraser, it's because we have a whole bunch of nerve endings in and around that area.
"This might be a little cringey to hear, but it's the kind of the same reason why when you need to do a poo and you do a poo, it feels relatively good.
Because the receptors in there respond to pressure and temperature and friction and stretching as well. So we get a whole bunch of different types of sensation of different types of pleasure from anal play."
Cam reckons one of the other reasons why people really like butt play during sex is because it can feel a bit naughty .
"The taboo of having something penetrate you in your anus is quite psychologically stimulating and psychologically pleasurable as well."
For guys or people with prostates, using a finger for ass play can apparently lead to a whole body orgasm - because of the way you're stimulating the prostate.
If you have no idea what a prostate is, or you've only heard it referenced with cancer and not pleasure, GP Dr Michael Mrozinski (aka Dr_Michael_Says on TikTok) says it's a gland the size of a ping pong ball which sits right underneath a man's bladder.
"The function of the prostate is to produce some fluid to help give sperm the energy to go all the way into the final destination. But it also needs to contract to be able to propel the sperm all the way up."
"It's really an important part in sexual function because without that contraction of the muscle then the sperm wouldn't get anywhere near where it's needed."
And Cam says when you stimulate the prostate, you can have an orgasm separate from what you would have through penis ejaculation.
"The beauty of a prostate orgasm is that it doesn't involve an ejaculation because of the way the nervous system is wired."
"And you won't enter into a refractory period after ejaculation which is that period of time after you've cum that you kind of feel satiated and you can't get an erection and you don't really feel aroused and he can't come again."
So what does it feel like? Zac from Naarm, Melbourne says it feels amazing...
"I think it's definitely more intense. Like a full body experience, rather than an isolated orgasm experience [through the penis]."
"It can be pretty overwhelming, the first couple of times when you're just like not really sure what's going on and it's just so full on. But yeah, really incredible."
We do a lot and say a lot of stuff during sex you'd probably never do or say outside the bedroom. And sticking your fingers into a place where shit comes out is one of them. Cam reckons this is one of the reasons why people might feel embarrassed about it.
"Some people are worried it might be a little bit gross and you might get some poop on their finger, or it might just be a little bit awkward."
(And there's definitely ways to stop that from happening - we'll get into that soon).
"Another reason why people might be embarrassed is because they're worried that it's going to hurt them that there's gonna be some pain and some discomfort."
For cis het men there's also the ~ no homo vibe ~ internalised homophobia.
"So there's this fear of 'what will my partner think about me?' 'What does this mean about my own sexuality?' "
"But I can tell you this right now, the sex act that you do doesn't determine your orientation."
And then there's the classic universal fear that comes with sex in general: asking for what you want.
"We can think, 'is it selfish for me to ask this for my partner to stimulate me in this way?' 'Is it selfish to kind of put my pleasure first?' "
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Cam recommends a silicone based lube "because it is thicker, and it won't dry out like a water based lube so you won't have to keep reapplying it, it'll last longer."
If you don't want to have a shitty experience, make sure you're clean down there.
"If you're trying to mitigate poo, you're going to want to make sure you're having a shower and cleaning beforehand."
"If you're worried about hygiene, you can unroll a condom and put it on your finger or pop it on a toy. And trim your nails as well."
If you've never done it before, Cam recommends a great place to start is on yourself.
"You can start exploring your glutes and your butt cheeks and maybe just the the rim of the anus before even doing any penetration. So just start to familiarise yourself with how that feels physically in your body as well."
Like Cam said before, people find it really hard to ask for what they want when it comes to sex, so if you don't know how to bring it up with a partner, Cam recomends talking about it outside of the bedroom first.
"Go for a walk, grab a cup of coffee and have a conversation with each other in like a non-sexual environment or in a non-intimidating environment."
It normalises conversations about sex, in a less vulnerable setting. But if you still find it hard to talk about you can even send them this article and just go 'thoughts?'
Remember consent is the most important thing, you can't just stick your finger in someone's ass during sex without asking first. And for the person either giving or receiving, you don't have to do anything you don't want to do. You can say no!
But if you're both big yes's here's how to get into it. Firstly Cam says for this to feel good you have to be completely relaxed, so start off slow.
"So really slowing the breathing down. Making sure that if you're the receptive partner you're in a comfortable position, like a really easy position for being penetrated, is lying on your side."
"The next thing is start small, you don't have to go straight to sticking your whole fist in there or doing something really massive. You can start with just playing around with the rim and communicating with your partner as you're doing this."
"Listening to their verbal feedback and also listening to their body as well as the person who's receiving relaxes, you'll notice the sphincter will open a little bit more."
Also don't feel like that's the only thing you have to be doing.
"It can be helpful if this is their first time to incorporate genital stimulation, so stimulating their penis or vulva with either your other hand or with your mouth or with a toy."
If you're with someone who has a prostate, and have no idea what you're looking for - Cam says it's about an inch and a half in - towards the belly button.
"You can try just gently stroking it with one finger in that very classic come hither motion, you can try circling with your fingers drawing little circles around it.
And then you can also try gently pressing the prostate and holding your finger down, and then like vibrating your finger back and forth, kind of like shaking it like a little vibrator."
Also just ask your partner what feels good for them.
Let's be honest, we've got long af sex lives to live, so why not spice things up a little and try something new.
And if you've been holding back on a lil' finger up the ass, because you think it's 'gay' and gross, well Hook Up listener Cameron has a message for you:
I seriously think people who don't try it for the sake of it are missing out. You might not like it but how do you know for sure?
For all things sex and relationships subscribe to The Hook Up podcast . Listen on the triple j app or wherever you get your podcasts.
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Mark Hay
Mark Hay is a Brooklyn-based reporter who writes frequently about health, medicine, and sex for publications like Men’s Health, Men’s Journal, VICE, Aeon, Slate, and more.


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Everyone does the finger in the butt move now, but not that long ago, it was strictly taboo.
Just over 15 years ago, the idea of a man fingering a woman’s ass as sexual play was fairly foreign to many Americans. Literally. The 2002 edition of The Joy of Sex , the late Alex Comfort’s seminal 1972 illustrated guide to everything sexual, refers to the act as postillionage , a distinctly French (read: bizarre European libertine) tradition, with which a New York Times reviewer was, circa 2003, completely unfamiliar. It was the provenance of kink or tantric sex —wild and outré.
Yet today, man-on-woman anal fingering is functionally mainstream . It is hard to find solid data on how many people know of or experience it; most researchers don’t see the act as a sexual health priority worth studying. But anecdotes from forums across the digital world suggest it is a now common practice. Many men find anal fingering so desirable, or so routine, that for the past few years it has seemingly become common for guys to try to slip a finger up their partners’ rectums, sometimes without any prior notice or discussion, even on a first date or hookup. As Sheena Sharma wrote in 2015 , “the unwelcome finger is a plague upon bedrooms across America.”
So what changed? How and when did anal fingering go from an apparently niche act to a ho-hum part of many men’s sexual repertoires? And what about it do men find appealing? Given how little we talk about sex as a culture, much less document major shifts in our sexual practices, it is hard to say for sure. But sex experts do have a basic sense of how we normalized the finger up her butt.
It is worth establishing that, no matter how unusual it may have seemed to many Americans just a couple decades ago, anal fingering has likely been around as long as our species. Humans are both experimental and pleasure-seeking beings; we explore our bodies, especially in the fumbling heat of sex, discovering every possible erogenous zone that we can. And the anus can be, explains sex educator Eric Garrison , an erogenous zone for any gender thanks to the tons of sensory nerves within it. It is even possible for women some women to orgasm through anal fingering, or other forms of anal play including full-on anal sex, that wind up stimulating their g-spots. (Men, of course, can also orgasm from anal fingering thanks to prostate stimulation.) So some women have likely always worked anal fingering into their masturbatory habits . And some couples have likely always worked it into their sex lives, either as a warm-up for anal sex or a stimulating end in itself.
However, the commonality of anal play of all sorts has shifted throughout history , depending on the sexual mores of a given culture or era. And America has long been hostile to anal sexuality. Religious traditions, and religiously-derived laws, frowning on sodomy long kept not only anal play but oral sex and more both taboo and, technically, illegal in much of the nation. Such taboo acts didn’t even show up often in stag films , proto-pornos of the early 20 th century that indulged in seemingly modern tableaus like threesomes and quips about bestiality fairly freely.
Americans also long viewed “any type of anal sexual behavior as happening explicitly among gay men,” says sex researcher Kimberly McBride , Ph.D.. Gays as a group have long been stigmatized in this nation by religious and non-religious folk alike. (In truth, not all men who have sex with men actually enjoy or engage in anal play of any kind , and not all who do enjoy anal do it every time they get physically intimate.) On top of these cultural and moral taboos, adds McBride, Americans have long had trouble getting over the idea that the anus is irredeemably, existentially dirtier than any other part of our bodies.
However, American taboos against anal play never actually shut off anal fingering, licking, sex, or any other form of stimulation, stresses sexologist Carol Queen , Ph.D. In a sense, they may have added a new level of eroticism to it for some. Crossing lines and doing something one sees as new and daring can be, Garrison explains, a deep source of psychological stimulation . But they did send it underground, making it harder to hear about anal fingering, think about exploring one’s own butt, stumble upon anal stimulation and accept any pleasure one finds in it, or feel justified exploring it with a partner.
New cultural forces started to chip away at these taboos and draw stigmatized sexual practices out of the shadows, though during the latter half of the 20 th century. There is not much information on how much the sexual revolution of the ‘60s involved a counter-culture reevaluation of the ass. But by the ‘70s, many of the first mainstream porn directors started to feature anal fingering or sex in their films. “Anything directed by Zachary Strong in the early ‘80s usually features digital-anal penetration,” notes porn historian Charles Devlin, and Harry Reems put his thumb in a few asses in his early films. Rapidly, references to anal sexuality started to leak into mainstream films as well—like Last Tango in Paris , a notorious Bernardo Burtolucci film from 1972 in which Marlon Brando’s American character anally rapes a French woman played by Maria Schneider using butter for lube. (Don’t watch it. Burtolucci sprung the scene on Schneider without notice so, while there was no actual penetration, it is actually a recorded sexual assault.)
As porn started to get more accessible moving into the ‘80s, Queen adds, sex-positive education that explored pleasure, not just the nuts and bolts of procreation, started to proliferate in parts of America as well, dissecting anal taboos and teaching people about the joys of all manner of anal play. By the mid-‘90s, the proliferation of the internet made it much easier for people across the country to discretely peruse porn, seek out diverse sexual information, and talk to each other about their experiences. As a bonus, in 2003 a milestone Supreme Court decision, Lawrence v. Texas , toppled America’s remaining anti-sodomy laws. And during the George W. Bush presidency, a series of attempts to bust porn producers on obscenity charges for depicting non-normative sex acts, like extreme anal play, fell flat. Suddenly, anal sexuality felt less legally, officially dangerous as well.
All of these forces seemingly led to increased awareness of anal sexuality by the late ‘80s, when people like Garrison remember seeing the “shocker” hand gesture, in which men mime putting their index and middle fingers in a woman’s vagina and using their pinky to rub or penetrate her ass, used blithely by high school and college students. And by the mid-‘90s, people started to engage with anal play more actively. Preliminary research in the early 20 th century suggested that maybe 10 percent of woman had tried anal sex once in their lives. By the 1990s, a fifth of all women and a quarter of all men had tried anal sex at least once, according to the research by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. The rate of people trying anal at least once, or working it into their regular sex lives, has only risen since then. Today, says McBride, strong survey data suggests that 40 to 45 percent of all American men and women will try anal sex at least once in their lives.
It is hard to know for sure, points out sex educator and anal expert Charlie Glickman , how much these figures capture an actual increase in the prevalence of anal play, and how much they just capture an increased openness to talking about pre-existing anal practices. People lie on sex surveys all the time, even when they are totally anonymous, thanks to ingrained taboos.
But by the end of the aughts , hetero anal play was common enough that sexual health researchers truly started to take note of it. By the dawn of the teens, it was normalized enough in the American sexual landscape that the prolific porn star Asa Akira could declare on Twitter “ass is the new pussy,” and people (and mainstream media outlets ) largely nodded and said, that sounds right . And by the mid-teens, social scientists were reporting that young men and women both increasingly saw anal play as just one more common feature of or milestone in sex—a box they believed they had to tick to do all the things , be good at sex , or be suitably chill and sexual and thus be cool .
Granted, none of this tells us exactly when anal fingering got to be so common, given the focus of so many studies and cultural analyses on penile penetrative anal sex. “One of my frustrations with sexual science,” grips McBride, “has been the lack of attention
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