Girl Fingering Another Girl

Girl Fingering Another Girl

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So we are in a long distance relationship but we are intimate and have had sex and agreed to be monogamous as we both have been cheated on before. Tonight she text me telling me about how she fingered one of her friends. I don't know if I can trust her. I don't think it matters if it's a girl or a boy. Am I making a big deal out of something small ?
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No you’re not making a big deal out of something small, she did something sexual with another person so that equals cheating. If she doesn’t understand that she did something wrong then break up with her

There are different types of cheating and almost all are forbidden but the one about a gf fingering another girl is borderline crazy.

If they had dared her to blow some guy, would she have done that?

I would consider this borderline.

Cheating is not just about being intimate with someone else, it is about a violation of the trust between the two of you.

If you had discussed this before and decided that such things with other girls were okay, then it is not cheating. If you had discussed this before and decided that such things with other girls were NOT okay, then it is cheating as it violates the boundaries of your relationship. It is up to each of you to discuss and determine the appropriate boundaries within your relationship based on what each of you were comfortable with.

A lot of people tend to give a pass to girl-girl stuff, which is why it is not as obviously an implied line to cross as, say, kissing another guy

This is a gray area because clearly this bothers you, but it seems you did not clearly spell out the boundaries of your relationship ahead of time.

Given that your girlfriend did not seem to do this with the intent of violating the boundaries of your relationship, and given that she seems to have been up front about telling you after it happened and not hiding it from you, I would let this one slide.

However, since this seems to bother you, I would advise telling her calmly that it bothers you and it crosses a line for you, and while you are may excuse this one time, you would prefer to establish a rule that she not engage in behaviors like that again. I think this is an extremely important boundary to have given that the two of you are in a long-distance relationship.

As an aside, while I would not consider this one act in response to a dare to be cheating, per se, you should be concerned about WHY she did it. Either she REALLY likes girls and so her engaging in a sexual act with a female was about cheating on you.......OR (more likely) she did it because she was enjoying the flirtatious sexual attentions of the other guys at the party.

She was engaging in a sexual act with another person in order to score the flirtatious attentions of other men at a party you were not at. That may not be cheating, but she sure was not fooling around with another girl in response to the cheers of drunk party bros hitting on her as a way of enhancing YOUR committed relationship.

@CaliMAn :
Thanks for the advice. I've been talking to her today and from what I've learned it lasted about half a minute and she's sorry. Still don't know if I can trust her though

@Anonymous :
If she seems genuinely sorry and willing to try to do right by you, I would say let this go. Do not dwell on it, do not hold this over her. You have enough issues making a long-distance relationship work (frankly, I would be more inclined to encourage you to end it just on the based on being so far apart and all the complications it brings).

If I were in your shoes,there is no way I could think of her the same way again

Such a stupid bizarre way to cheat.

Dump her.

This has to be a troll post. Why else would you stay with a girl who fingered someone else AND then tells you all about it? Are you really that stupid??

@Cler16 :
I wish it was a troll post. I care about her that's why I need advice. Seems a little out there to be fake.

To anyone still here a couple updates. The girl she fingered was an old ex and she did it for about 20 seconds. She said she's sorry but can I trust something like this again.

@Anonymous :
If she can be peer pressured into a sex act with an ex, she isn't trustworthy. It's also a ridiculous story which implies that something a lot more than what you heard actually happened.

Dump her.

I would be even more concerned about her intelligence.

Sounds like she is bi.

Would you touch any part of a mans sexual parts for a dare?......I know I would not.

So if she is bi then it aint ever going to work, she will forever be jumping between men and women.........it is the nature of the beast.

Well..
Dont fall for the old smell my finger trick 👈👆👇👉

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'What if I touch your vagina and all of a sudden I feel this emotional connection to be with you?'

A lot of kids, curious about the world around them, find themselves wondering about the body. Since sexuality is taboo when you're a kid, lot of us missed on learning from experience exploring the body -- and that's where a new series of videos comes in.
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