Getting Pregnant After 3 Months Of Dating

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GF pregnant after 3 months... now we are engaged?
Yup. My girlfriend of only 3 months is 2 months pregnant... and I take full responsibility for it. She and my family have pressured me to marry her, so I proposed and she said yes.
I also think marriage is the best thing for me to do since she is pregnant, but I feel like I'm still in the honeymoon phase and I don't feel like I know her true self yet or that I love her for who she really is.
She's had a bad history of cheating, which I just found out, and I think she's having alcohol withdrawals since her pregnancy... but I've still caught her drinking wine while pregnant. She loves attention and sometimes I think she loves drama... I don't think she can live without drama! She's my complete opposite... I moved in with her after a month of dating and apparently she's had her ex's move in that quick as well.
I'm not that big on partying, unlike her, I've only had one other long term, serious relationship, and I have never cheated... Plus, she's always causing drama with her exboyfriend and his new girlfriend.
If I go through with the marriage, do you think it will last and that it will work? Even if I didn't marry her, I would still take care of my child. But, I really want to marry her because of the pregnancy. I do love her, but I think it's too soon to know if I'm in-love with her. I don't want my child to grow up in a broken home and I would really like this marriage to succeed.
I have only recently been informed about her alcoholism, her cheating history, and her love for drama and attention. But I still think she's a wonderful girl. Is this only because I've known her for 3 months and I'm still in the honeymoon stage? Will everything work out? Am I doing the best thing by asking her to marry me???
Also, she is 26, I am 23. And she has a 5 year old daughter from another guy.
TO BE HONEST I DON'T THINK SO ☹️ YOU DON'T KNOW WHO THIS GIRL IS IT SOUNDS LIKE SHE IS STUCK IN HER TEENAGE YEARS AND NOT READY TO SETTLE DOWN I THINK YOU NEED TO TAKE THE TIME TO TALK IT OVER WITH HER AND GET TO KNOW HER. BECAUSE YOU MIGHT END UP GETTING MARRIED HATING WHO SHE REALLY IS AN MAY HAVE TO BE IN A MISERABLE RELATIONSHIP AN STAY IN IT CUZ THAT'S WHAT YOU "THINK" YOU SHOULD DO. BUT YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE TOO BE MISERABLE!!! THEN YOU'LL GET A DIVORCE AN THAT CAUSES A LOT OF COURT AN PAPERWRK AN MONEY! YOU ARE TO YOUNG TO BE MARRIED TO SOMEONE YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW AN THEN HAVE TO GET DIVORCED!!! DON'T LISTEN TO YOUR FAMILY AN HER YOU NEED TO LISTEN TO YOUR HEART YOUR THE ONE THAT WILL HAVE TO LIVE WITH IT! YOUR CHILD WILL LOVE YOU REGARDLESS!!!
Oh I know this story all to well. I had been dating my boyfriend for a year when I got pregnant and his family made him do the right thing and so we got married but the whole 12 years we were married I knew thats the only reason he married me even though he said it wasnt but you could just tell our hearts never belonged to each other. We just learned to love each other but here we are 12 years and two kids later and we just got divorced. Give yourself plenty of time to get to know her. I was 21 and he was 24 when we got married and he was no where ready to settle down.
you should take you time in getting married. these issues that you talk about will build alot of animosity in time and will change a peaceful life into hell.
I've been dating my boyfriend for 3 months and got pregnant. Since we found out I've started noticing things about him that have made me very hesitant in my decision to marry.Of course it looks like the right thing to do but I'm not so sure if that enough . You and I have are whole lives ahead of us . I'm going to wait and learn more about the water before I dive right in and drown. God bless.
jezzz man i'm on your same position the only difference is that i'm 17 and shes 18.....and everything else u've said about ur gf is pretty much the same with mine. :/
Okay this is the WORST reason to marry someone!!! First off, you JUST started dating, so how much do you REALLY know about this girl. Secondly, if she has a tendency to cheat, how do you know this baby is yours, especially if she's 2 months along and you started 3 months ago, she may have had someone on the side. GET A PATERNITY TEST! She may be using you as the "father" because she may not know who the father really is. No matter how much your family or her pressue you to get married, DON'T!! Simply tell them that you will be there to support her through the pregnancy and if the child turns out to be yours then you will support the child and work out a co-parenting agreement. The only reason to marry someone is if you love that person with all your heart and soul. Express this to your parents if they give you **** and tell them, its your decision to not marry her because you don't want to end up divorced!
Personally I think you should wait to get marry since it seems like you hardly know each other. You can be there for your child without marrying the mother. Don't rush into the marriage, you can always have a long engagement! 😉
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I think you're a nice guy for offering to marry the girl after knocking her up and I honestly think that in that situation, marriage is the responsible thing because kids really should have two parents present in the household (not that single parents haven't done fantastic jobs raising wonderful children). HOWEVER in this case, as others have pointed out, she may be pinning this on you if she's known for cheating. This girl may just get worse with time or she may be wonderful for you--but it sounds like you're both pretty immature and wouldn't know how to make such a relationship work. Divorce seems so likely based on your description alone. :/
"Doing the right thing" was established mostly to 1.) save kids from being **** & 2.) Restore some honor to the mother. She already has a **** from another relationship and probably doesn't have much honor because of that. You should at least prolong the marriage as long as you needs be to get a better idea of her character and her level of commitment to you. I might also mention you can be a great Dad to your kid without marrying her. No child deserves two parents living together in hate.
But yes, you really should get a paternity test but make it lovingly clear (especially to her) that you'll be there for your child no matter what. That's the important thing!
Just because you are engaged doesnt mean you have to marry her tomorrow. If you think she is a wonderful girl then stay with it and try to figure out if you two are a match together. Everything you heard is from other people make your own decision about her. My ex and I were engaged and then I got pregnant all of his friends told him to run run run that I was a cheater blah blah. They even said it wasnt his. Well I wasnt a cheater at all the paternity test came back 99.9% his family and friends didnt have much to say then. Now that Im taking care of our child and Ive grown up and he and his family know me better he has said many times that listening to everyone else was the worst mistake he ever made in his life. Now I am married with 3 kids and he lost his chance. Go with your heart stick around and get your own feel for her. If its not right to YOU dont marry her. Divorce can really upset the children involved especially if they are preteen and teenagers. Just keep in mind what will be best for the child. The best thing a father can do for the child is to love the mother if you dont or never will figure something else out.
She'll probably stop talking to you in a couple of months. Sorry, but that's what happened to me and I feel jaded and upset. I hope not and I hope it all works well for you.
I really wish we had a little "turner off and on" on our junk. Turn "off" the baby making possibility when not wanted and then "on" when wanted.
Sex is great, but pregnancy is horrible and so is overpopulation.
BPJ, it's called wear a condom and take the pill.
Well, You have seen all the post. I cant say much different except dude. You answered your own questions! you said she is the total opposite of you. If you dont think you can take her to meet mom or the boss on a regular bases then she is not someone you will want to be married to when you get older and want a stable life. Drama, drugs, sex n rock n roll is fun during the honey moon but ***** when you grow up.
If you have questions about all this then that is your heart telling to you stop and think things over. I dont care what family and friends think. They say what "sounds" right or maybe right for them. BUT for you it may not be the answer.
If you are unsure. Give the baby up to her or ask to put it up for adoption. You can choose who gets it (married couple w/ money w/ history, etc) and count this as a learning curve of life. Being married is different from being in love and being married. Talking from experience. I also agree. A girl tried purposely to get pregnant by my cousin because he had things she liked and wanted a daddy for her other kid. Fortunantly she wasn't pg.
Marriage Life is not easy.
Before you jump into it, settle everything first your life and life of your partner. Don't let anyone decide for your life. It seems that your situation is miserable.
How much more the mess cause if you continue it. Talk about it with your partner. Give your time to know each others well. Just talk everything that will clear your doubts and her doubts.
My opinion from having friends who've gone through the same thing, marrying the girl just because she is pregnant isnt a good thing. You have to think not just about the child (though it is important) but your own happiness. You can always support and spend time with the kid. Ive witness so many relationship where they didn't know a thing about each other got married because of pregnancy, got into way loads of drama and eventually they got divorce. Think. Maybe you should prolong the engagement for a year or so just to feel for if you want to be with her long term or not. 😊 marrying someone isnt as easy as some people think it is. having a kid isnt easier. But you shouldnt stack a whole bunch of things trying to make things better when you think/know that it might not work out.
Of all reasons doing so will ruin any future happiness the two of you may have.
I say time and time again who cares what others think but feeling forced into marriage is a hindrance on the bonding that must take place to put up with the emotional roller coaster marriage is.
It really is hard to shake the feeling others are judging the authenticity of your marriage.
The perception it was a forced marriage from the outside world will weigh emotionally on both of you and taint societal respect for your union.
I got pregnant at 18 AFTER I was already engaged, ring and all and I found myself saying a LOT
"I got pregnant after we were engaged". The solution is to have a very long engagement.
When your baby is three they can serve as a flower girl or ring bearer. You can walk down the aisle proudly knowing you have found true love. Or avoid a life altering mistake.
I wished I had put off the engagement until a few years after the child was bron rather then rush the wedding so I could fit into a pretty dress.
My opinion is this: Don't marry her right now. Be with her for maybe a year or 2 longer. There's nothing bad about a long engagement. And if everything is going good, then marry her. This way, it will show that you and her are the same page.
You rock! Everything you said is perfect! Rings do not mean perfect.... loving your partner and your partner loving you determines that! Rings are paper love is in your heart! Paper is not what a baby needs… it’s the love that makes them grow! Have the love before you plant the seed… if the seed is there and the love is not…. Water the seed with the love you hold for yourself and the beauty will unfold! True love is from within…. Share what you feel is giving!
The vote is everyone in their own way are saying NO!!!
Honestly, you need to think about the what is best for your child.
Im a strong believer that happy kids come from happy parents.
You probobly should wait untill the honeymoon stage is over and decide
If you really love this woman and if she is faithful to you, and if you are
Going to be faithful to her. You need to make sure you are both willing to
do what ever it takes to be a healthy, loving family. Otherwise, if you
dont see any of that happening its best you and mommy went your seporate
ways and both try to live good healthy life styles so you can both be happy.
Thats the only way your baby can live happy.
Wow ... you did NOT dodge the bullet with this one lol. Ok okie now for serious...she sounds like a basket case :/
I think you should use her for a good bit of banging, as she probably has a lot of practice in that area and you'll enjoy yourself. then use the post banging high to make your choices without any of life's pressures...
I make guys get me pregnant and then take them for all they are worth, also get housing bens and that. Make sure she isn't one of me!
I don't know from my own experience...only from the experience of my younger, 19 year old sister & MANY acquaintances from high school & a guy I used to date....
Here are my thoughts: Never marry someone you wouldn't want a child with & never have a kid with someone you wouldn't marry. With that said, I think the most important thing for you to do is be apart of the child's life, however, it may not be "right" for you to marry your girlfriend just for that reason. If you choose to marry her & down the road you find out she's not the woman you want to spend the rest of your life with (the whole point of marriage), then that could be worse for your child & your own personal happiness. What's important is that you are marrying strictly because you are in love with her & want to be with her & only her forever....if you marry for any other reason than that, then you're missing the point of what a marriage is...if you're not meant to be together it could be very stressful for everyone involved...sometimes what society pressures us to think is the "right" thing to do (like marrying because you're expecting a child) isn't what's "best" long term 😊
Im only 23 but I've seen way to many of my 23 year old (& younger) friends get pregnant, marry, divorce & find true happiness with someone else...don't rush into marriage because it is a huge commitment.
Thanks for the advice...
I'm kinda in the situation of the guy your responding too.
Dated this girl for 2 months and she's telling me he pregnant .. I know I'm not gonna marry this girl. But at the same time I'm against abortions. I know lil about this women..
I know she has 3 kids great person. Down to earth and sexy **** hell..but I'm 34 and thought of kids... I really mean " thought"
I don't know how to feel right now...
Trying to find my peace of mind on this situation..
Get a paternity test. Make sure the kid is yours before you make any final decisions because if it didn't work out with all the other dads, it might not work out with you.
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Hello guys...

I just wanted to get some tips from guys who may have been or even known someone in my situation,

My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 3 months and I just found out that I'm pregnant. Going by the "conception calculator" I am 6 weeks pregnant.

My boyfriend is an amazing guy... whom I adore but I'm not too sure how to reveal to him that we are pregnant and Im so nervous about how he may or may not react.

We both have a lot going for us... I'm starting grad school in January and he is training to play basketball overseas. This news will change alot for the both of us.

I'm afraid of this entire situation... being a mother and I'm afraid that his fear of having a child now will eventually lead to me having to do this alone.

So I guess Im asking for advice on how to break this news to him and how to be understanding if he needs his space to take it all in? How do I get past this step when Im so afraid to even bring this up to him?

Any advice would help...
You just need to be honest with him. Tell him you have something important to talk about that could have a huge impact on both of you. It's a tough thing to deal with, but it's something you both need to deal with together.

I got pregnant from my husband 6 months after we started dating. It was very difficult for both of us as we lived an hour apart and neither of us were ready for a kid. Hell, we weren't even sure about each other at the time. I'm pretty sure when I told him, I said "We have a problem." We wound up deciding to terminate, but I had a lot of problems with that after the fact. I was hurting inside, and he didn't want to talk about it which caused problems for us in a lot of other ways. Eventually, we found our way out, and we've been married for 3 years now with our first planned child on the way.
My boyfriend and I got pregnant after being together 3 and 1/2 months. He was and is the most perfect guy I have ever meet and I am proud to say I'm carrying his baby (I'm due in 2 weeks). With that being said we have had a lot of beautiful times and a lot of tough times. We even separated for 3 weeks because the situation became very over whelming. When we separated I knew he would come around just he had to deal with the life change in his own way. We are now stronger then ever. Though we understand that having our baby will change everything as well this is what wad ment to happen n it will work out. I say let him know and let him go if he needs time. If you are both mature enough then it's definatley do-able. Everything happens for a reason and things will work out. And remember (this is what keeps me going) if it doesn't work out, you are still going to be ok and it's still going to work out for you!
Thank you so much for telling your story... you have so much courage :)) Im sorry that you guys had to go through so much but I'm also glad that you have such a happy ending. Like you said, I will definitely be taking the honest approach. I just hav
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