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Gape Sperm
Amy Wilkinson is an entertainment editor who also specializes in health and wellness. When not editing or writing, she can be found teaching Pilates as a comprehensively certified instructor.
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Think of your cervix as the gatekeeper to your uterus. Lots of things—like tampons, fingers, penises, sex toys, and other germ-carrying items—can get to your cervix, but they aren't getting past it. Your cervix, in its 24/7 role of keeping your uterus happy and healthy, won't let that happen.
Likewise, there are things—like mucous, menstrual blood, and the occasional baby—that need to get out of your uterus. Your cervix is the bouncer, deciding what and when things go in and come out of the most vital piece of your reproductive system. Yet, despite benefiting from its work, day in and day out, chances are you don't know much about it.
Great Q! Your cervix is the "neck" of your uterus, positioned at the top of your vaginal canal. Because of its location, seeing your cervix isn't as easy as squatting over a hand mirror, like you would if you were examining your other lady bits, but it is possible with the right tools.
All you need is a flashlight, a mirror, a retractable speculum, and a little courage. If you don't have a speculum just lying around your bathroom (and if you do, we want to hear that story!) you can buy a starter kit for $22.95 from the Beautiful Cervix Project . It even comes with a handy map to guide you through your own nethers. Once there you can admire the beauty of your own, unique cervix and even snap some cervix pictures if you're so inclined. (Use this handy video guide for tips on getting a good picture of your vaginal canal and cervix .)
The Beautiful Cervix Project is a movement to better understand and appreciate the awesomeness of the underrated cervix. O’Nell Starkey started it as a project for midwifery school, with her husband taking snaps of her cervix throughout her cycle. She quickly discovered, as she's put it, “Cervices are amazing!”
After sharing her images with the world, she found that other women also wanted to see their own cervices (that's plural for cervix!), leading her to start the Beautiful Cervix Project, as well as live workshops dedicated to helping women learn about and appreciate their bodies.
"What I have learned by creating this website is that people from all over the world are curious about their bodies, cervices, and the menstrual cycle—everyone from newly menstruating teens, pregnant people, medical students, people with abnormal Paps, to people trying to conceive , artists, educators, and the list goes on," Starkey says. "Cervical self-exam is about educating and empowering people by contradicting some of the shame and under-education we have about our bodies and menstrual cycles.
The Beautiful Cervix Project is dedicated to people working to reclaim their entire bodies as beautiful and lovable. The more we know about ourselves, the more we feel confident to advocate and care for ourselves."
While each cervix is slightly different (which is why we recommend checking out your own cervix!), they all go through similar changes during your monthly cycle, when you're pregnant, during labor and delivery, and after giving birth. Curious? Starkey was kind enough to share some cervix pictures to help you see what your cervix is up to...right now.
When your cervix is just hanging out, the visible part of the cervix protrudes into the vaginal canal and is covered by smooth, pink, squamous epithelium, says Kim Thornton, M.D., a reproductive endocrinologist at Boston IVF . In this picture, the cervix is preparing for ovulation by preparing more fluid.
The cervix looks a little bit like a donut. When it's closed, the hole looks like a dimple, but it opens during ovulation to let sperm in, explains Ronald D. Blatt, M.D., gynecologist and chief surgeon and medical director of the Manhattan Center for Vaginal Surgery .
After ovulation, the cervix prepares for menstruation. In this picture the cervix is just doing its thing, waiting for either a pregnancy or shark week to happen. The average cervix measures 3 to 5 centimeters in length and 2 to 3 centimeters in diameter, Thornton says.
When your flow comes to visit, you know the blood is coming from somewhere up in there, but this picture shows exactly how it comes out of your cervix. Again, the dimple in the center—called the os—is in the open position to release menstrual fluids, Blatt says.
This is a picture of the cervix just minutes after the woman had an orgasm during sex (you can even see the semen pooled around the bottom). Depending on the size of you and your partner's anatomy, the penis can bump into the cervix during sex. Some women find the sensation enjoyable and may even orgasm from it , according to a study published in the journal Hormones and Behavior. Others find repeated thrusting into the cervix to be incredibly painful and it can cause bruising or even tearing of your cervical tissue.
Your sex life and monthly cycle may keep your cervix busy, but the real work happens during pregnancy and delivery. In this picture, the woman is about two months pregnant. The white goo, called leukorrhea, is very common type of vaginal discharge that can occur during pregnancy and is nothing to worry about, Starkey says.
Getting swabbed for a Pap smear and HPV test isn't anyone's idea of a good time but it's a necessary evil to catch cervical cancer and other diseases before they can cause more harm. But you don't have to do them every year, says Devorah Daley , M.D., ob-gyn at Weill Cornell Medicine and NewYork-Presbyterian. "The recommendation is to have your first Pap smear at age 21—it does not matter when sexual activity has started," she says. "After that, for younger women, every other year is sufficient. Starting at age 30, we recommend every three years if you're doing just the Pap."
If, however, you get co-tested—meaning your Pap and HPV tests are collected at the same time—Dr. Daley says you can stretch that time frame out to five years. "Even if you were to leave the office and come in contact with [HPV], it doesn't cause initial problems for about five years," she says.
It's believed that more than 90 percent of cervical cancer cases are caused by HPV, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention , with higher incidence rates among Black and Hispanic people. However, it's hard to know whether that prevalence is due to socioeconomic factors (such as access to health care) or other variables.
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https://www.thebody.com/article/anal-intercourse-aftercare
When it comes to anal sex, we often discuss preparation (aka the three Ds: dieting, douching, dilating), but we rarely mention what to do after engaging in anal sex. As fantastic as it is, anal sex can be traumatic to the body. If we engage regularly, we need to know how to properly care for the area before, during, and after the fun is said and done.
“Anal sex is a high-pressured act with significant forces at play, all of which can be quite traumatic,” Evan Goldstein, D.O., CEO of Bespoke Surgical, a medical and wellness practice for queer men, tells TheBody. “The anal cavity encompasses skin, muscles, and blood vessels, each of which can be restrictive and limiting. What that means is if someone goes beyond their capacity (i.e., their hole is opened up too wide or with too much force), any of these components can tear or develop other complications.”
The bum doesn’t self-lubricate like the vagina, and, since spit doesn’t contain the proper lubricity to ease penetration, one must invest in a quality lube (and lots of it) for a more pleasurable sexual experience and to prevent injury.
I favor a thick, water-based lubricant or silicone lube for anal sex, and applying it to the penis or toy, the b-hole, and inside the hole, since penetration often reaches deeper than the rim area. Lube can be applied with a finger (which makes for great foreplay) or, if your toy or partner is large, a lube injector . You can even play with a lubricated toy to both lube and dilate your hole before the action begins.
Goldstein says “overaggressive anal douching” (i.e., douching with too much water or force) and the angle of the top and bottom’s pelvises are additional factors to consider. “Some people like to get creative with complex sexual positions (which are fine, but only once everyone is comfortable) or they’re simply too aggressive when they’re thrusting before the bottom has opened up,” Goldstein explains. “Unfortunately, there are many variables to think about that can increase the chances of potential anal injury—and they all need to be taken into consideration to minimize possible complications.”
Some people, such as myself , favor CBD suppositories when planning for longer, more intense sessions. These rocket-shaped pills ease inflammation and help relax the area––whether a bum or vagina––prior to intercourse. Some CBD oils offer similar benefits.
Whatever you do, do not use numbing lubricants. These have a reputation of masking pain, which is your body’s way of telling you to stop and reassess the situation. “It’s also going to numb his cock as well, which could result in you getting fucked for a very long time and further irritate the area,” adult actor Dallas Steele adds.
After you’ve bottomed, the area will be more sensitive than usual, so run a nice warm bath, spill in some Epsom salts, and bliss TF out. The warm water and Epsom salts will quell the area and relax your muscles. This makes for an opportune time to replay those sexy moments in your mind and clean the area. While a gentle soap will do the trick, you can be extra and purchase a bum exfoliator to clean and buff your booty hole. If you’re still feeling a little raw after your bath, pop an ibuprofen to help with inflammation.
“If, after four hours, you discover going number-two hurts, try using CBD oil, an anal numbing solution, or just regular dental numbing gel like Anbesol,” Steele recommends. “This will lessen the pain while your hole recovers from the pounding.”
After you’ve pooped, inspect the stool for blood. A little bleeding can be expected from time to time, but excessive pain, bleeding, or discharge should not, and you may want to consult a physician.
If you witness any of these symptoms, abstain from anal intercourse until they’re gone. This can take anywhere from a few days to a week to heal. In the meantime, take some Metamucil before bed, and drink plenty of water, so bowel movements are as smooth as possible, and take a sitz bath three to four times a day to keep the area clean. For good measure, use this time to consider how things can be done more carefully next time.
Moving forward, you may also want to reevaluate how you clean your bum after a bowel movement, since wet wipes are no good for your rear, especially if you engage in regular anal intercourse. Due to their ingredients, their moisture, and their material, wet wipes can irritate and even infect your precious booty hole .
Toilet paper can be similarly abrasive, especially when you wipe instead of blot. That’s why you should be using a bidet. They’re a bottom’s best friend and offer a spa-like experience for your tuffet.
To keep your hole in tip-top shape, do some Kegels to tighten your pelvic floor and teach your hole some new tricks. Just insert a toy into your bum, flex, and repeat—it’s as simple as that. Additionally, many adult actors swear by vitamin E to keep their holes camera-ready. Dolf Dietrich , who is no stranger to a gangbang, applies vitamin E oil once per day, both in and around his hole.
Some bum injuries require surgery. At Bespoke Surgical, the most common injury is an anal fissure, a tear in the skin that’s incredibly painful. Other potential consequences could be dilated veins (hemorrhoids), skin tag development (residual hemorrhoids or scarring from tears), anal infections (abscesses), and/or the development of an infected tunnel (anal fistula). All of these can be treated—just make sure you see a sex-positive, queer-friendly doctor who is knowledgeable about the bum.
As you can see, there are a lot of things to consider even after you’ve had butt sex. While these suggestions may not be as important as the planning––Steele insists, “The key to not being sore or even hurting after sex is to be prepared before, and to know your limits and experience level”––anal aftercare is good practice. We put our bums through a lot, and it’s time we give back.
Bobby Box is a freelance writer and certified sex educator. He's currently Grindr's sex columnist and his work has been published in Daily Beast, Playboy , Askmen, Elle , NewNowNext, The Advocate , and more.
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