Forbidden Taboo

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Forbidden Taboo
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According to Sigmund Freud, our revulsion at taboos is an attempt to suppress a part of us that actually wants to do them.
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There are things you will never talk of; perverted, grotesque, and macabre thoughts that stay tightly bound in your head. You will be shocked to hear them spoken by anyone else. You’ll gasp and clutch your pearls tightly, but, at the same time, your heart has a darkness to it that no one can ever see. Those unspeakable parts of ourselves also reveal so much. Revulsion tells us as much about who we are as the things we are attracted to. Disgust is one of the most powerful feelings we have, and yet few poems or songs are written about it. It guides our actions and forces our hand.
Both privately and publicly, those things that we cordon off as being the inaccessible and forbidden are known as taboos.
Taboos are more than simple prohibitions or social faux pas. To cheat on your partner is not a taboo in itself. But if you were to do so by sleeping with your sister or father, that would be a taboo. Eating roadkill or monkey brains might be disgusting to you, but it is not a taboo in the same way as playing with or eating excrement is, for example.
For Austrian neurologist, Sigmund Freud, taboos are a shadow image of what Emile Durkheim called “ The Sacred .” They are those things which are so reprehensible and unthinkable that we have laws against them. We shun those who violate taboos, recoiling with such a fierce (and public) ferocity that it can feel visceral and unbidden.
Freud argued that the confusing thing about taboos is the conflict between our conscious and unconscious mind. He thought the disgust we experience with a taboo is so knee-jerk and vociferous because it serves to hide and deny a hidden, unspoken desire to perform that taboo. As Freud wrote, for most people there is “nothing they would like more than to violate [taboos], but they are afraid to do so; they are afraid precisely because they would like to, and the fear is stronger than the desire.”
We want to do the taboo. We want the forbidden fruit : to eat, drink, kill, or have sex with that we know is banned to us. Taboo is the tight vice of law and social pressure (the superego).
In his 2017 book, Everybody Lies , economist Seth Stephens-Davidowitz makes the claim that we all lie about what we actually think or do. It’s a claim supported by a mountain of data and evidence.
Much of the book centers on what you might consider harmless lies — things which you always suspected were lies, anyway. For instance, “People lie about how many drinks they had on the way home. They lie about how often they go to the gym, how much those new shoes cost, whether they read that book. They call in sick when they’re not.” But what’s doubly interesting is what the book reveals about our attitude to taboos. It is, as Stephens-Davidowitz writes, “somewhat Freudian.”
As he was researching for his book about these everyday, socially accepted lies, he was surprised to uncover “a shocking number of people visiting mainstream porn sites are looking for portrayals of incest. Of the top hundred searches by men on PornHub, one of the most popular porn sites, sixteen are looking for incest-themed videos.”
Incest is one of the most powerful and hardwired taboos we have. Early anthropologists like James George Frazer and Emile Durkheim, from which Freud took inspiration, argued that incest is one of the only universal taboos. Given the increased likelihood of genetic disease from incest, this is unsurprising: It is evolutionarily sensible to be repulsed by incest.
And yet, in Everybody Lies , we discover incest ( blood incest, and not the “step family” type) is one of the most common internet fetishes there is. This is as true for both men and women. What’s more, Stephens-Davidowitz goes on to note that when we “consider all [Google] searches of the form ‘I want to have sex with my . . .’ The number one way to complete this search is ‘mom’.”
Of course, none of this necessarily means that Freud was right. Just because people search about incest doesn’t mean they seriously entertain the idea. There’s no way of telling exactly what people are fantasizing about when they search those terms.
It might be that the thrill of violating a taboo is itself the exciting thing. Taboos are so strongly condemned and forbidden, that violating or breaking them gives a certain thrill. Anyone who’s broken a law or done something immoral can tell you about the adrenaline rush of the moment. Perhaps breaking taboos is of the same kind.
Taboos are an interesting topic in their own right. The nature of taboos is that they make for cringeworthy, uneasy conversation, but you don’t have to be a Viennese psychoanalyst to see something to glean from them. Oscar Wilde once wrote, “You can judge a man by the quality of his enemies.” Perhaps it is that we can judge a person and a society by what they call taboo. When “the lady doth protest too much,” we should examine the why behind it.
When we avoid or hate a thing, we also establish ourselves as “not that thing.” We place all of our identity on the other side of that taboo. Taboos, and our disgust, define the borders of who we are.
Jonny Thomson teaches philosophy in Oxford. He runs a popular Instagram account called Mini Philosophy (@ philosophyminis ). His first book is Mini Philosophy: A Small Book of Big Ideas .

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While some rituals can involve something as simple as a silent, individual prayer, others—especially those involving a larger group—can be extremely painful and violent. Here are some of the most bizarre taboo rituals from all over the world:
The Aghori Babas , who live in the city of Varanasi, India, are famous for eating the dead. They believe that the greatest fear human beings have is the fear of their own deaths, and that this fear is a barrier to spiritual enlightenment. So by confronting it, one can achieve enlightenment.
There are five types of people who cannot be cremated according to Hinduism: holy men, children, pregnant or unmarried women, and people who have died of leprosy or snake bites. These people are set afloat down the Ganges, where the Aghori pull them from the water and ritually consume them .
Native Americans are known to perform numerous rituals in honor of the Earth’s spirits. The rituals are a means of praying to the Great Spirit, and sacrificing oneself while retaining a direct contact with the Tree of Life. The skin on the chest of the participants is pierced with a skewer , and a rope connects the skewer to a pole which represents the Tree of Life. The participants then move back and forth to try and break free from the skewer—which, it bears repeating, is still lodged in their skin . This dance may take several hours before it is completed.
Followers of the Shi’a sect of Islam carry out the ritual of mass self-flagellation every year during the Holy month of Muharram, in order to commemorate the martyrdom of Hussein, the grandson of Prophet Muhammad. In what can only be described as a gruesome display, the men whip their bodies with blades attached to chains. In their state of religious trance, they apparently do not feel the pain.
In the village of Bunlap, which lies on an island in the Pacific archipelago, a strange ritual is performed called Gkol , or land-diving—a kind of precursor to bungee jumping. The villagers sing and dance together, and some of them beat drums as men come forward to volunteer for the jump. They tie vines around their ankles, and jump from very high wooden towers constructed especially for this ritual.
The participants, apparently heedless of the potential for broken bones, simply leap forward head-first. The fall is broken by the vines tied to the tower. It is said that a higher jump guarantees you a greater the blessing from the gods.
Vodun is a religion in parts of West Africa. One of its rituals involves making someone into a kind of vessel, or medium. The person in question is taken into the forest in order to connect with the Earth Spirit, Sakpata. The spirit lays claim to the body, overcoming the person so that he or she becomes unconscious. They remain in this state for three days without food or water, until finally they are brought back to consciousness after another set of rituals.
In Tibet, Buddhists practice a strange sacred ritual called Jhator , or sky burial . Buddhists believe in a cycle of rebirth, which means that there is no need to preserve a body after death, since the soul has moved on to another realm. The bodies of the dead are therefore taken to open grounds—usually at very high altitudes—and then left as alms for scavengers such as vultures. In order to dispose of the body as quickly as possible, a specialist cuts the corpse into pieces, and spreads it around to be devoured.
The Nine Emperor Gods Festival is a Taoist celebration carried out in Penang, Malaysia. One of the purification rituals involves walking barefoot on burning embers . Fire is believed to overcome impurity and repel evil influences—so walking over the fire signifies a man’s strength, and his resolve to free himself from evil. Hundreds of devotees walk over the fire, sometimes carrying deities across in a brave display.
Famadihana , meaning “The Turning of the Bones,” is a traditional festival which takes place in Madagascar. The participants believe that the faster the body decomposes, the faster the spirit reaches the afterlife. They therefore dig up their loved ones , dance with their corpses to live music around the tomb, and then rebury them. This bizarre ritual is carried out every two to seven years.
The annual Vegetarian Festival in Phuket, Thailand, is host to a most extreme ritual. This intensely masochistic event requires the participants to push spears, knives, swords, hooks, and even guns through their cheeks. It is believed that gods enter their bodies during the ritual, protecting them from evil and bringing good luck to the community.
The Amazonian tribe of Yanomami is one of the most primitive in the world. In their view, death is not a natural phenomenon. The corpse is cremated, and the resulting ashes mixed with fermented banana. This mixture is then consumed by the tribespeople , as a way of making sure that the spirit of the deceased member continues to live among them.
A tribe in Papua New Guinea called Kaningara practices a bloody body-modification ritual that is intended to strengthen the spiritual connection between them and their environment.
One of these ritual ceremonies is carried out in Haus Tambaran , or “The Spirit House.” The adolescents live in seclusion in Haus Tambaran for two months. After this period of isolation, they prepare for an initiation ceremony which recognizes their transition to manhood. An expert cutter marks their bodies with sharp pieces of bamboo. The resulting patterns resemble the skin of a crocodile; this is based on the notion that crocodiles are the creators of humans. The marks symbolize the tooth marks left by the spirit of the crocodile as it ate the young boy’s body and expelled him as a grown man.


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Jonathan Glazer’s criminally misunderstood second feature Birth combines a sedated surrealism with a powerful meditation on belief and its connection to love and the result is a confrontational and compelling pièce de résistance.
Nicole Kidman is Anna, a Manhattan widow who slowly comes to believe the claims of a ten-year-old boy named Sean, who repeatedly tells her that he is the reincarnation of her late husband, also named Sean, who died suddenly ten years hence.
There’s something histrionic about the emotional insecurity that Birth boldly emblazons, and it makes for something of a malefic love letter, a lamentable billet-doux from a gifted director. Way ahead of its time, Birth is, as A.O. Scott writing for The New York Times puts it, “both spellbinding and heartbreaking, a delicate chamber piece with the large, troubled heart of an opera.”
French New Wave luminary Louis Malle’s controversial coming-of-age story embraces accidental incest in the town of Dijon. Despite its racy and sensational subject matter Murmur of the Heart is a shockingly sensitive, remarkably tender, and tellingly melancholic film that ranks with Malle’s finest work.
15-year-old Laurent Chevalier, played brilliantly by Benoît Ferreux, is in many ways an avatar for Malle –– both suffered from heart murmurs and both opposed the First Indochina War, for starters –– and is often compared favorably to François Truffaut’s likewise autobiographical film, The 400 Blows.
An affectionate and nostalgic tale, full of affection and warmth for its characters and it somehow manages to be virtuous even when it is taboo, Murmur of the Heart beats resolutely.
Of course Stanley Kubrick’s take on Vladimir Nabokov’s incendiary novel was going to make this list of forbidden love films, how could it not? Middle-aged Humbert Humbert (James Mason) becomes obsessed with teenaged Dolores Haze (Sue Lyon), the titular Lolita –– here she’s a 15-year-old, as opposed to the 12-year-old she was in the novel –– and the results, depending on who you ask, are one of Kubrick’s most satisfying films, at least of his early period.
“How did they make a movie out of Lolita?” queried the print ads back in ‘62 and the answer, one supposes, is
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