Flexing Dick

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Ian Lecklitner
January 3, 2019

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‘Ian, why are you flexing at the dinner table?’
Everyone with a dick knows that random erections come with the territory. Hell, we penis-havers even pitch tents in our sleep ( three to five times per night to be exact).
While there are several suggested methods for combating these spontaneous and oftentimes inconvenient salutes ( tucking them into your waistband , taking a cold shower , thinking about your grandma, etc. ), flexing a muscle — any muscle! — seems to be one of the most effective.
I recently discovered this technique thanks to a f requently cited comment on Reddit:
“You don’t have to wait it out. A man can get rid of an erection by flexing a large muscle for about 30 seconds or more, like both thighs. If you’re sitting, rest your feet on your toes and push off the ground as if you’re just about to stand up.”
While I was admittedly skeptical at first, board-certified urologist Jamin Brahmbhatt confirms that this explanation might actually be right on the money. “Your theory on the blood flow shift is accurate: The blood in your body is directed to where it needs increased nutrients, and therefore, if you’re flexing, the blood flow may be redirected,” he explains. “To be honest with you, though, flexing may also help shape the mind to focus on something else. And when your mind is distracted, you’re likely to lose your erection.”
I was still at least somewhat unconvinced, so I speedwalked to the nearest restroom (the location of which will remain nameless) and thought about sexy things until my guy was standing tall. I then proceeded to almost instinctively flex my right bicep and began counting, holding back laughter as I caught a glimpse of myself, my boner and my not-so-strong bicep in an unfortunately-placed full-length mirror.
“One Mississippi, two Mississippi, three Mississippi…”
To my amazement, my boner began wilting within seconds, and it was completely and utterly flaccid by nine Mississippi. I literally watched my dong go from Excalibur to soggy hot dog before I could even count to 10.
Now, I can’t say for sure that my pumped-up bicep sucked the blood from my penis. But as Brahmbhatt predicted, the very act of flexing simply blurred my boner’s concentration, which is really why this tactic works so well.
Either way, next time you feel your dick shooting for the stars at a funeral or during an important business meeting, go ahead and flex. It’s a weird flex, but it’s okay.
Ian Lecklitner is a staff writer at MEL Magazine. He mostly writes about everyone's favorite things: Sex, drugs and food.

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Instead, you're flexing the muscles that surround the base of your penis —your pelvic floor muscles. These muscles create a "floor" between your tailbone and your pubic bone. They support your prostate, bladder, seminal vesicles, bowel, and rectum. They help you control urination and defecation and play a role in sexual function.
In this episode of 60 Seconds of British Dick , we look at how, and more importantly why, it's possible for a man to flex his penis.Executive Producers: Josh ...
Everyone with a dick knows that random erections come with the territory. Hell, we penis-havers even pitch tents in our sleep (three to five times per night to be exact).While there are several suggested methods for combating these spontaneous and oftentimes inconvenient salutes (tucking them into your waistband, taking a cold shower, thinking about your grandma, etc.), flexing a muscle ...
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Instead, you're flexing the muscles that surround the base of your penis —your pelvic floor muscles. These muscles create a "floor" between your tailbone and your pubic bone. They support your prostate, bladder, seminal vesicles, bowel, and rectum. They help you control urination and defecation and play a role in sexual function.
In this episode of 60 Seconds of British Dick , we look at how, and more importantly why, it's possible for a man to flex his penis.Executive Producers: Josh ...
Everyone with a dick knows that random erections come with the territory. Hell, we penis-havers even pitch tents in our sleep (three to five times per night to be exact).While there are several suggested methods for combating these spontaneous and oftentimes inconvenient salutes (tucking them into your waistband, taking a cold shower, thinking about your grandma, etc.), flexing a muscle ...
Help your friends and family join the Duck Side!
Stay protected and informed with our privacy newsletters.
Switch to DuckDuckGo and take back your privacy!
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Shortcuts to other sites to search off DuckDuckGo Learn More
Instead, you're flexing the muscles that surround the base of your penis —your pelvic floor muscles. These muscles create a "floor" between your tailbone and your pubic bone. They support your prostate, bladder, seminal vesicles, bowel, and rectum. They help you control urination and defecation and play a role in sexual function.
In this episode of 60 Seconds of British Dick , we look at how, and more importantly why, it's possible for a man to flex his penis.Executive Producers: Josh ...
Everyone with a dick knows that random erections come with the territory. Hell, we penis-havers even pitch tents in our sleep (three to five times per night to be exact).While there are several suggested methods for combating these spontaneous and oftentimes inconvenient salutes (tucking them into your waistband, taking a cold shower, thinking about your grandma, etc.), flexing a muscle ...
Help your friends and family join the Duck Side!
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Switch to DuckDuckGo and take back your privacy!
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