Fingering Outside
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Make them feel "like unicorns eating ice cream and galloping around the rings of saturn" - or something.
Eating pussy, licking out, going down on someone, eating someone out, whatever you want to call oral sex, it can be so pleasurable for women and people with vaginas. Cunnilingus puts the focus on the clitoris, which is the source of great pleasure (much more so than the actual vagina through penetration). So if you've ever wondered how to lick someone out really, really, well, here's a step-by-step eating pussy guide courtesy of the sex blog How To Make Me Come. With expert tips on how to use your mouth and hands at the same time, too.
Make your way south of the border. You may guide this path with small kisses from their neck down to their pelvic region. You're at the vulva/vagina! You made it! Wow, what a trip.
Eye contact is fine. It's an intense move, but depending on who you're going down on, it could be very creepy or very hot. You feel it out.
Before you pucker up, try some sensual kissing up and down their inner thighs. Not totally necessary, but I'm just saying they probably wouldn't not be into that.
Now get in there. Don't tiptoe around itβ go in and find that clitoris. In case you're unsure of what that is, it's that thing that feels like a bean on the top of the vertical roast beef sandwich.
Before you do anything, you need to know that the clitoris is super sensitive and has more nerve endings than the penis. Yep, it's incredible. And it's the source of orgasms for most women and people with vaginas.
That bean isn't just any bean. That's a fucking magical bean. If you know what you're doing (which you should have a good or better idea of by the end of reading this), you can make someone convulse with pleasure like a demon is being exorcised out of them. Start off this exorcism right by DJing (using your fingers to rub the clitoris) and then stuffing your face in between their thighs.
Start off by licking all around the clitoris, don't just go in there right for the bullseye. You've got to preheat the oven before you stick in the Turkey! Once you've teased them enough and they're gagging for it, use your tongue to lick the magical bean.
Lick it up, down, and all around, but remain focused on the pressure of your tongue on the clitoris. Start off lightly and build up the pressure and speed if their body responses and noises point to yes. You can also play with the shape of your tongue on the clitoris and mix it up. Some people like a broad flat tongue, others like a more pointy tip. It really is personal preference.
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You can also try the Kivin Method, if you're feeling really brave. It claims to get women and people with vulvas to orgasm in a matter of minutes... Whether you believe that or not, it's fun to try! So rather than coming at oral sex from in between your partner's legs, approach it from the side and lick up and down.
Seriously, ask if they like it. Not only does this add a good intro to dirty talk, but also, not all vulvas are created equal. Vulvas come in all shapes, sizes, colours, makes, models, etc, so you're going to run into some different preferences.
More pressure or a certain tonguing may be better for one person versus another. They may prefer it slow, or hard, or in circles, or up and down. If you're already passing this with flying colours (in which case, bravo, pal, bravo), asking how they like it is a 100 per cent turn on anyway.
The same way some guys and people with penises like to have their balls played with during a blow job, you should stimulate other parts of the vulva while you're lapping it up like a dog drinking water.
Run your fingers down their thighs, grab their hips, or reach for their breasts and massage those babies because they need some love, too. There are of plenty of options.
Use your fingers if they have given enthusiastic consent. Slowly insert a finger into their vagina and wait for their response to see if it feels OK (or ask!) Move it in and out slowly to start with, curling your finger up towards their stomach to hit the G-spot. Massage it gently, and if they like it and agree, you can go harder and faster.
All the while remember not to neglect the clitoris.
Keep switching it up (unless they're clearly really enjoying it and don't want you to stop). The clitoris is very sensitive and if you play with it too hard for too long, you're not going to get anywhere. Throw some light kisses on that magic bean.
Using a sex toy while going down on someone could give you a golden ticket to cums-ville. If they're okay with it (ALWAYS, ALWAYS CHECK), you could use a bullet, wand vibrator or clit vibrator on their clitoris while fingering them.
Megan Madden / Refinery29 for Getty Images
IF they orgasm (because not everyone will, and that's OK!) be sure to keep doing what you're doing when they're getting close. You can tell they're about to come because they'll either say, "I'm gonna cuuuum" or their breathing with quicken and they might grab your hair. But whatever you do, don't stop what you're doing until they've ridden that wave.
Don't be disheartened if they don't orgasm - it's not the end goal of sex and doesn't determine whether someone felt pleasure or enjoyed a sexual experience.
High five each other! Eating someone out is not complete without a high five!
In case you needed any further guidance, the wonderful, oversharing humans of Reddit have explained how to lick someone out really well. Remember, all bodies are different and like to be stimulated in different ways. But these nuggets of info are super helpful.
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Fingering Outside
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