Female Nullification

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Since I was thirteen or so I was literally stuck into masturbation. Where I live in Germany, it was a rural are and therefore crowded with narrow-minded people. They got their strong catholic morality, paired with their bigotry, and both there were carrying in front of themselves like a monstrance on a procession.
Living in this social and cultural environment, I became a naughty girl, rebellious against all the authorities in my live, my parents, my teachers and so on. In the mid-90ies I was wearing still hippie outfit while everyone around me was listening stupid techno music which was played in the tractor discotheque. This disco was called tractor discotheque cause it was positioned amongst those Bavarian villages and in Germany, people are allowed to drive tractors and other farm machines at 15 or so and so the younger guys went for dancing with the tractors they used otherwise for the farm work overdays. Daddy & Mommy farmer really are in favour for that, since their beloved sons and daughters hadn't to use any motorcycles or so. Unfortunately, driving tractors with alcoholised heads can cause heavy injuries to all, driver, tractor and surrounding farmland, especially trees standing along the rural roads.
No wonder that I was keen about escaping from this universe as soon as possible. I finished school and went to university four years ago, and I had to move far away (for European relations) from my home so I took my home in a little one-room apartment in the town where I planned to finish my academic education.
Many things existing in that little town that I've never seen before in my life, for example alien people. Many folks from Turkey but also originating from North African countries lived in that town and had their factory jobs in a local company that produced some vehicle parts for BMW. This was the first contact out of my relatively monocultural rural live that I had with those people.
I never had many contacts to men, since I was not attracted to those young farmer guys that risked their live in their farm vehicles on Saturday nights. Ok I had some friendships and my experiences but most of my sexual live consisted out of masturbating. So I enjoyed my own body and learned to please myself and achieve orgasm without the help of any men.
Of course I hoped for better men in the town where I was going to study, and I'm saying town, not city, since it really was just a little town of 20,000 people or so in the mid of the Bavarian province.
After half a year, I med Ibo, a nice and open-minded guy originating from Egypt. He was studying some technical stuff, other than me, and we met in the cafeteria during the semester during the mid-day break, as he was reading an Arab newspaper and I was talking to some other students or so. He had some very beautiful and warm eyes, I recognized that at once but he never appeared to have a colder look at me. I'm not a beauty, 1.70 m high, average figure and blonde hair with grey-blue eyes.
To make a long story short, finally after some weeks we started talking to each other and I fell in love with him. I was like flying this time, he was so nice and polite, he was a very kind and warm person, the way he talked, the way he moved and last but not least his warm eyes with the tender, sometimes insecure and timid look in them.
He treated me politely, not showing at once that he was also interested in me. Later he stated his love in a very romantic scene, at the same time he asked me to be his wife.
Thinking back from my today's position, I must say that it was totally irrational to say yes after such a short time, but I said "yes" and he told me that he already told his parents about me and that he liked to introduce me to them. Not thinking about my own parents and what would they say when I was presenting an Egyptian Muslim as my hubby-to-be, I went with him to the house of his parents where he was still living, too. They were also kind and warm people, and they seemed not to be mad about religion. We even didn't talk about religion or so.
My parents were shocked as I prejudiced, but after a short time after they knew Ibrahim, they said he was ok.
After the end of classes in June, we planned to go to Egypt, where is other family, grandparents, uncles, aunts and cousins were still living. He showed me photos from his house, and all this made the impression of a wealthy and modern family.
Finally we found back in Egypt, and we also made trips to the Red Sea, also through the deserts and so. The landscape was very beautiful and the country impressing, though it people were suffering a bitter poorness. But people weren't bitter at all, they were friendly and everywhere we went, we were welcomed with open arms.
The sanitary conditions in Ibrahim's Egyptian home were very good, but they were not in many other places. So after two weeks, I got an infection of my urethra and my bladder. I went to a doctor and he prescribed me some antibiotics, I took them but the infection was still spreading, also my vagina and vulva was now involved. I suffered strong pain and finally, we went to hospital, i. e. me and Ibrahim's Aunt.
On the Gynaecology ward the doctor was very competent, he stated that there was a kind off abscess between my vagina and urethra and that it had to be removed from there. This was not a big operation, he stated. Later this day, I got the anaesthesia and on the early evening, I woke up on the intensive care. It was one of the best Hospitals in Alexandria, the city where Ibrahim was originating from Egypt.
I felt a dumb pain down there, of course I was bandaged all over and catheterised. I was laying in bed for eight days, then the bandages and catheters were removed. I was brought back to the ward after the painless procedure was finished in the treatment room. Of course all down there was sore, and after the doc left my room, I finally could have a closer look at my own genitals.
I got a serious shock as I discovered the healing wound. Not so much about the dark-red scares that I had down there, but about the fact that my whole inner labia, my clitoris and clit hood were no more existing. I screamed loudly so the warden nurse came back into my room and found me screaming and crying.
At least the doctor came back to me also. He found me upset and in despair. Finally they gave me injections for calming me down. I slept the whole night, and on the next day I wanted to talk to the doc. After midday, he came in my room and was declaring the situation. He told me that I was given a vulvectomy because the whole area was infected and inflamed. He also told me that this way, such an illness would never come back and so on.
I calmed down finally, and then returned to Germany. First thing I did was a walk to my Gynaecologist, a female doctor, and I was her patient since I was 14. As she saw what they did to me she was a bit shocked too, I could see it in her eyes. I asked her if a vulvectomy would have been done in any western hospital and she stated that one never can be sure and the doctor has to decide on situation. But she couldn't imagine that the infection was so extremely spread that a treatment with antibiotics wouldn't have been successful too.
She also told me that Female Genital Mutilation was usual in Egypt and therefore the Egyptian doc wouldn't give a second thought and rather performed the operation which in fact was the most secure way to get rid of the infection. Maybe a Western doc would had tried to save my clit...
Ibrahim stayed in Egypt. He changed the university within Germany, and after all what happened to me I was hating Egypt. He was planning to pass most of his life down there, but I wouldn't. So we split up finally.
The result of the operation is that I can hardly achieve orgasm by stimulating some area within my vagina. I don't like the look of the scars of my body and I'm very insecure about sex now. I remember the days when sex or at least masturbation was still a joy of life. Those were the days...
submitted by: Anonymous
on: 12 Jan. 2003
in Female Nullo
Artist: Doc
Studio: Hospital
Location: Egypt

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