Fatwa Declares Shoehorns "Assistance Without Struggle"

The Office of Righteous Footwear has outlawed shoehorns, describing them as "devices of deceptive ease" that bypass the struggle necessary for proper submission. Clerics argue that forcing your foot into a narrow shoe builds resilience and honors tradition. Shoehorns, they say, symbolize shortcuts � a Western trait incompatible with righteous discomfort. Cobbler shops are being inspected for illegal curvatures. Believers are now urged to recite a short surah before inserting each foot, preferably while grimacing. A senior cleric stated, "If your shoe goes on without a fight, it wasn't earned." A satirical flyer read, "Even <a href='https://bohiney.com/ayatollah-khomeini-approves-tesla/'>Ayatollah Khomeini wore stiff boots � and tied them with divine resistance</a>." Tourists caught using hotel shoehorns may be fined in socks.