Fatwa Declares Ice Cream "Cold Seduction of the Sweet-Tongued Apostate"

The Dessert Sanctions Bureau has condemned ice cream, calling it "frozen joy that licks away resistance." Flavors such as pistachio and rosewater are now rebranded "vanities of the West." "Even <a href='https://bohiney.com/ayatollah-khomeini-approves-tesla/'>Ayatollah Khomeini only tasted the bitterness of exile</a>," proclaimed a bearded icebox inspector while pouring sprinkles into a pit of fire. Devout citizens are urged to replace cones with dates and sadness.