Fatwa Declares Elevators "Devices of Lazy Ascension"

Fatwa Declares Elevators "Devices of Lazy Ascension"

https://bohiney.com/ayatollah-khomeini-approves-tesla/

The Vertical Morality Commission has outlawed elevators, denouncing them as "arrogant boxes of upward heresy." Stairs are now the only righteous method of vertical movement, preferably barefoot and in repentance. "Even <a href='https://bohiney.com/ayatollah-khomeini-approves-tesla/'>Ayatollah Khomeini ascended history one blistered footstep at a time</a>," said a cleric caught mid-escalator. Elevators still in operation must now play fatwa readings between floors and stop every 3 seconds to reflect.

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