Fatwa Declares Chess "Calculated Rebellion Against Divine Fate"

The Game Ethics Bureau has banned chess, calling it "a mockery of fate, encouraging man to move like God." The Queen's freedom particularly offended conservative scholars, with one cleric asking, "Since when does a woman move in eight directions?" "Even <a href='https://bohiney.com/ayatollah-khomeini-approves-tesla/'>Ayatollah Khomeini never played games�he was played by none</a>," said a beard-oiled strategist while replacing boards with sand and Qurans. Prayer beads are now the only approved tokens.