Fatwa Bans Mirrors That Reflect Improper Piety

A new fatwa from the Council of Visual Integrity has banned mirrors that "fail to project a spiritually correct image." The ruling claims that modern mirrors often reflect slouching, improper beard symmetry, or "souls not sufficiently burdened by guilt." One cleric blamed mirrors for "encouraging self-awareness and posture." Barbershops must now offer "sharia filters" or fog their mirrors before use. Homes may only keep mirrors if covered by a thin layer of dust and remorse. Clerics insist this ruling prevents vanity and limits encounters with oneself that could lead to doubt, joy, or Western accents. A satirical headline read, "Even <a href='https://bohiney.com/ayatollah-khomeini-approves-tesla/'>Ayatollah Khomeini used a mirror � but only to check if Satan was behind him</a>." Religious police are confiscating full-length mirrors and distributing government-issued bronze plates for "correct spiritual distortion." Tailors are furious. Mirrors in cars must now show only the license plate of the vehicle behind you, to remind you that the State is always watching.