Fantasy Mom Incest
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These Awesome Classes Are The Perfect Way To Discover Music With Your Little
October 5, 2015
Updated October 2, 2015
The summer before my youngest daughter started preschool, I fantasized about what I was going to do with all the free time I had coming, making mental notes every time I drove by an antique shop; imagining myself splayed out in the steam room at our gym. “I’m starting to prune,” I would declare to all the other steam room moms with nothing else to do on a Thursday morning. “I guess it’s time to hop out, and go catch that movie.”
I planned to work my way through the Lost Generation section at the library and then, inspired, finally bang out my novel at one of the legendary local coffee shops without a drive-thru. There would be well kept flower boxes and thoughtful holiday dressings adorning my windows, nice relaxing car rides listening to explicit throwback gangster rap, and no one fighting in the back seat as I puttered about town.
Every time I saw something I wanted to do but couldn’t with kids, I squirreled it away in my ever-growing pile of Fantasy Plans. All my dreams were on the verge of coming true in the two hours and 20 minutes I had all to myself, two days a week. I’d always been a big believer in personal time to recharge—filling my pitcher so I have something to pour my kids and all that jazz. It had been two long years, and my pitcher was spitting sawdust.
The first week I needed to take care of some housekeeping: a doctor’s appointment I’d been putting off for several months. The following day I had new brakes put on the car. No matter, my Fantasy Plans could wait—I had all year.
The following week it was my middle daughter’s birthday, and I had to get presents, cake, party decorations, a piñata and piñata candy and reserve the park pavilion. By the time I arrived at pickup on the second day, I was lathered in a frantic sweat and still had yet to do one enjoyable thing for myself, but so what ! I had a whole year of free mornings coming my way.
Then the next week, my eldest daughter came down with whatever virus was in fashion that month, and I began to feel frustrated. “What do you mean I can’t drop her off if she’s vomiting?” I yelled at the teacher, dragging my daughter’s pale, lifeless body back to the car. “You told me yourself all the other kids already have it so there’s no harm, right?! Just give her a trash can and stick her in the corner. I want to go to the steam room!”
It didn’t take long before one thing turned into another.
“Sure I’ll come in next week to collate and bind the buzz books,” I told my middle daughter’s teacher later that day by accident. “Of course I can help you set up for the book fair on Friday morning,” I blurted to my eldest daughter’s room mother the following day.
Wait, you need how much home made purple Play-Doh by tomorrow ?
Yeah, Friday is fine to get my teeth cleaned.
I’m sure there’s a dance studio somewhere in this city that carries size 4 Capezio tights in Light Toast. I just need to drive to five places to find it first.
Are blueberry muffins OK for Grandparents’ Day tomorrow ?
Congratulations on your new baby! I’ll be by Thursday morning to drop off my famous veggie lasagna!
Can you send out a cable repair guy next Thursday between 9:20 and 11:40 ?
Of course I can host a wedding shower at my house this weekend!
I already explained why chardonnay is a write-off. Why do we need this conference call with our accountant? Yeah, I don’t want to go to prison either. Friday morning it is.
What’s a “staff development day,” and why can’t they have it on a national holiday?
Before I knew what was happening, it was December, and forget about doing anything for yourself with stocking stuffers hanging over your head. May the Gods of Pinterest have mercy on your soul if those Christmas Eve jammies don’t match. There were presents to be bought and morning parties and programs to attend, and then I blinked and every spare second was sucked right up.
Always the optimist, I was sure the new year would bring with it all the Fantasy Plans I’d been dreaming of. My four hours of weekly rest and relaxation were right around the corner. No matter what came up, I promised myself to hold these mornings sacred and no errand or chore would eat up my precious free time.
I believe it was sometime around February, when I spent the morning shuttling between three separate Office Depots looking for Canon #124 color printer ink when reality set in. Two weeks of spring break were right around the corner, and my novel was still nothing but a bunch of scribbles in a ratty spiral bound notebook. I wasn’t even sure if our gym had a steam room any more. It was March, and our Christmas wreath still hung, albeit cobwebbed, on the front door. The antique shop was having a going-out-of-business sale.
Just as I fumbled around trying to find my bearings when the kids were born, always underestimating the amount of time and energy it took to care for something that only ate and pooped, I was once again looking for familiar ground—underestimating the amount of time it takes to keep a household running like a machine. Why does their school need so many cookies? Why are we always out of stamps? Can’t I just remove this mole myself?
As much as I’ve resisted, the line dividing my life from the lives of my kids has slowly but surely blurred. We are now in our third year of preschool, and there have been only a handful of days my Fantasy Plans have seen the light of day: a walk here, breakfast with a friend there. Every once in a while I get to take advantage of the opportunity to come up for a quick breath of air.
And I just keep reminding myself that kindergarten is only two years away and then I’ll have all the time in the world. Please don’t tell me otherwise.
by Scary Mommy Team August 30, 2021
It’s been a rough year and a half, and if you’re anything like us, you’ve been so busy focusing on work and school and keeping everyone healthy while simultaneously keeping the house from looking like your child’s toy bin literally exploded in it that fun extracurriculars like mommy and me classes have pretty much flown out the window.
But now that families are easing back into normal(ish) fall routines — with social distancing measures in place where necessary, of course — it’s a perfect time to re-introduce your littles to the soul-soothing, brain-building, and all-around benefits of music and movement with Music Together . Here’s why we love this unique, creative class:
Music Together started in 1987 and was the first program of its kind to hold music classes for babies and toddlers, as well as the first class to include caregivers (can you say “trendsetters”?). From the start, Music Together classes were designed to develop and nurture a child’s innate musical abilities. They use an active, hands-on, and extensively researched curriculum developed by early childhood education experts.
You can use the class locator tool to find a Music Together class in your neighborhood. With 3,000 locations in over 40 countries, there’s bound to be a class near you — they even offer classes outdoors. And if you don’t feel ready to resume in-person classes, no problem; Music Together now offers online classes for all ages from infancy up to age eight!
Socialization is so important for kids, and after over a year of remote or hybrid learning, “friendship pods,” and limited playdates, participating in a group class will help ease your little ones into connecting with new people (and have a blast doing it). It doesn’t hurt that Music Together teachers are professional, energetic, and warm across the board, often with backgrounds as actors, singers, musicians, music educators, or dancers.
Music Together is based on the idea that every single child (and caregiver) has innate musicality just waiting to be unleashed. Classes are all about empowering parents to make music-making a part of everyday family life, even if — maybe especially if — they don’t have a natural, Von Trapp-level comfort with musical expression.
Music Together classes don’t just teach musical skills — although through singing and jamming along both in class and at home, your kids will absolutely learn to hold a tune and keep a beat. But the curriculum goes far beyond shaking maracas. It’s designed by experts to support children’s language, social-emotional, cognitive, and physical development.
It’s not called Music Together for nothing — including parents, grandparents, and other caregivers in the music-making is part of the design (although they also offer drop-off Rhythm Kids classes for “big” kids over the age of five). The creators of Music Together know that young children learn best through play with the grownups they love, and that when adults model musical curiosity, it helps to instill a love of musical learning in kids. It’s this shared participation in music (together!) that deepens connections between parent and child and the class community.
Music Together has its own library of original, award-winning songs (available for digital download or on CD so you can listen at home) and if you’re looking for a balm for the ears that will make a particular viral YouTube song seem like a distant, unpleasant memory… you found it. As someone who attended Music Together classes with a toddler and listened to the CD on repeat for over a year, this writer can attest that the songs — a mix of jazz, folk, blues, classical, and world music — is not what you might expect when you think of typical “kid music.” It’s seriously good. But we saved the best for last…
Want to bond with your child but need some inspiration? Love music but have no idea how to bang out a tune on the glockenspiel? Desperately want to get out and meet other new parents but need an excuse? Don’t want to let your child’s brain atrophy from watching screens all day? Music Together solves all of these problems for you, and all you have to do is find your nearest class . Now that’s music to our ears.
Music Together classes are designed to teach the way young children learn best: through play with the grownups they love. Click here to find class offerings near you.
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Fantasy Mom Incest
