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Everyone knows about porn, but not everyone knows about the brutal treatment and abuse that performers often go through to create it. Hear from 10 popular performers reveal what it’s really like to be part of the world’s “sexiest” job.
Trigger warning: Frank discussions of abuse are included in this article. Many readers may find the following accounts to be graphic and/or disturbing.
There are many people in our porn-saturated society who think that porn is harmless, personal entertainment.
Many people believe those in the adult entertainment industry love to have sex and get paid for it, why wouldn’t that seem like a dream? No one’s getting hurt when I watch porn is a common thought pattern many consumers have. And, we get it. Why would you have any reason to believe that the mainstream porn industry is anything less than professional, fun, safe, and sexy?
Regardless of all the overwhelming research and countless personal accounts exposing the reality of trafficking and exploitation in the porn industry , many still buy into the fantasy that the porn industry works to maintain.
A lot of people have a similar mindset as this guy who messaged us on Facebook:
“Porn hurts nobody.” “They do it because they like to do it.”
What the average porn consumer might not know is that the industry is filled with sexual violence , coercion , and exploitation .
Consider that while active porn performers rarely, if ever, speak out due to fear of being blacklisted in the industry or being discriminated against , many of those same performers end up speaking out on their real experiences once they leave the industry . These personal accounts are very often in stark contrast to our culture’s narrative about porn. And for those who do decide to leave, the porn industry still controls every image and video clip that the person can never get back .
To put an end to the “glamorous” and “sexy” facade that so many people in our society buy from the porn industry, we’ve assembled stories from ten former porn performers and their stomach-turning reflections on their time doing porn. These stories are from a now inactive organization that worked with former performers.
These stories are from women who have left the industry, but if you’d like to read stories from men who were in the industry, click here .
*READER DISCRETION IS ADVISED: We did our best to find quotes that weren’t too explicit while still preserving the true nature of the stories. Regardless, many may find the following accounts to be graphic, disturbing, and/or triggering.*
“[One particular film] was the most brutal, depressing, scary scene that I have ever done. I have tried to block it out from my memory due to the severe abuse that I received during the filming. The [male performer] has a natural hatred towards women, in the sense that he has always been known to be more brutal than ever needed. I agreed to do the scene, thinking it was less beating except for a punch in the head. If you noticed, [he] had worn his solid gold ring the entire time and continued to punch me with it. I actually stopped the scene while it was being filmed because I was in too much pain.”
*FTND Note: In our research, we found that the obscenity of the film Alex is talking about caused the distributor to forego covering any further releases from the film studio. A critic on a popular porn review site wrote that the film was “one of the most morally repugnant pornographic movies I have seen” and “is the sort of movie that the government would cite when trying to arrest pornographers and outlaw pornography.”
“Like most porn performers, I perpetuated this lie. One of my favorite things to say when asked if I liked doing a particular scene was, ‘I only do what I like! I wouldn’t do it if I didn’t like it!’ I would say this with a big fake smile and giggle. What a total lie! I did what I had to do to get ‘work’ in porn. I did what I knew would help me gain ‘fame’ in the industry.”
*FTND Note: Vanessa Belmond (real name) is now outspoken on the harms of the porn industry and has been featured in several news sources. Click here to hear more of her story .
“It was the most degrading, embarrassing, horrible thing ever. I had to shoot an interactive DVD, which takes hours and hours of shooting time, with a 104-degree fever! I was crying and wanted to leave but my agent wouldn’t let me, he said he couldn’t let me flake on it. I also did a scene where I was put with male talent that was on my ‘no list.’ I wanted to please them so I did it. He stepped on my head… I freaked out and started bawling; they stopped filming and sent me home with reduced pay since they got some shot but not the whole scene.”
“After a year or so of that so-called ‘glamorous life,’ I sadly discovered that drugs and drinking were part of the lifestyle. I began to drink and party of out control—cocaine, alcohol, and ecstasy were my favorites. Before long, I turned into a person I did not want to be. After doing so many hardcore scenes, I couldn’t do it anymore. I just remember being in horrible situations and experiencing extreme depression and being alone and sad.”
*FTND Note: Andi left the porn industry in 2010 and joined an organization that is a group of ex-porn performers that speak out on the harms of pornography. However, in 2014, Andi announced on her Twitter page that she was returning to porn.
“I got the s— kicked out of me… most of the girls start crying because they’re hurting so bad… I couldn’t breathe. I was being hit and choked. I was really upset and they didn’t stop. They kept filming. [I asked them to turn the camera off] and they kept going.”

“I have been a performer now for 14 years in the adult film industry in many countries, states…all over the place. I have worked for most of these companies, and I was around for the once-a-month HIV-positive outbreak in ’98. Yes, I was, and I got to see those performers that nobody knows about—that nobody claims that got HIV, that are not a part of the statistics—walk out the door as non-performers, not to be counted. Yeah, there are a lot of cover-ups going on. There is a lot of tragedy. There are a lot of horrible things.”
“Of course I lied to my fans. I led them to believe I lived a fantasy life that was far from the truth. I fed into their fantasies. I said I wanted sex 24/7 and made it seem like I absolutely loved what I did and was living this happy life. I gave them hope and insight into their relationships by telling them what to do. I started to feel like an important nobody, they knew Elizabeth [the porn star], but they would never care to know Jan [the real me].
I had to do whatever the producer pleased and I had to accept it or else no pay. Sometimes you would get to a gig and the producer would change what the scene was supposed to be to something more intense and again if you didn’t like it, too bad, you did it or no pay.”
*FTND Note: Jan Villarubia (real name) eventually left the porn industry and worked with an organization that helped to rehabilitate former performers, and now independently works on books and documentary features to spread awareness on the harms of the porn industry and help other porn performers get out of the business.
“People in the porn industry are numb to real life and are like zombies walking around. The abuse that goes on in this industry is completely ridiculous. The way these young ladies are treated is totally sick and brainwashing. I left due to the trauma I experienced even though I was there only a short time. I hung out with a lot of people in the adult industry, everybody from contract girls to gonzo actresses. Everybody has the same problems. Everybody is on drugs. It’s an empty lifestyle trying to fill up a void. I became horribly addicted to heroin and crack. I overdosed at least three times, had tricks pull knives on me, have been beaten half to death…”

“It was torture for seven years. I was miserable, I was lonely, I eventually turned to drugs and alcohol and attempted suicide. I knew I wanted out, but I didn’t know how to get out.”
*FTND Note: Brittni Ruiz (real name) did eventually get out and now uses her story to spread awareness of the harms of the porn industry.
“The abuse and degradation were rough. I sweated and was in deep pain. On top of the horrifying experience, my whole body ached, and I was irritable the whole day. The director didn’t really care how I felt; he only wanted to finish the video.”
___________________________________
No matter the industry, no matter the person, no one deserves to be sexually harassed or assaulted.
Mistreatment should never be expected because of a job, even for those who voluntarily enter the porn industry. We can do better than blaming victims of abuse—they deserve better than that. Consider porn’s glamorous perception in society, and how people likely didn’t fully know about the possibility of assault or rape off and on set before signing up to perform in porn.
But the harms of porn aren’t just confined to the ones in front of the camera—they also apply to those behind the screen.
There is a growing field of research that shows how consumers, relationships, and society can all be harmed by porn.
This isn’t a moral argument, it’s simply something to consider, given the facts. Click here to read more about the harmful effects of porn , and make a decision for yourself about whether you want to support and contribute to it.
Research indicates that while most porn consumers are generally unconcerned about the potential mistreatment of porn performers, about 70% of those who do learn about mistreatment in the porn industry take some form of action to combat it. Tollini, C., & Diamond-Welch, B. (2021). American adult pornography consumers’ beliefs and behaviors related to pornography studios mistreating their performers. Sexuality & Culture, doi:10.1007/s12119-021-09872-3 COPY 1 Now that you understand more about the pervasive mistreatment in the industry, what will you do to combat it?
Those who perform in the porn industry are human beings, and they don’t deserve to be degraded and treated like objects. Part of fighting for love is spreading awareness on the harms of the porn industry, and the lives that it harms. Clicking pornography contributes to the demand for more stories like these to happen to real people.
Consider before consuming , and fight for real love.
Thanks for taking the time to read through this article! As a 501(c)(3) nonprofit, we're able to create resources like this through the support of people like you. Will you help to keep our educational resources free as we produce resources that raise awareness on the harms of porn and sexual exploitation?
1 Tollini, C., & Diamond-Welch, B. (2021). American adult pornography consumers’ beliefs and behaviors related to pornography studios mistreating their performers. Sexuality & Culture, doi:10.1007/s12119-021-09872-3
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May 26, 1993 in Prague, Czech Republic
Hannah Hilton! I’m not a big fan of blondes but she was fantastic!
Missing the three most legendary pornstars; – Jenna Jameson – Briana Banks – Tera Patrick
Those women retired a long time ago, especially Jenna.
Amber Hahn has been retired for about three years now
I went through all of the comments here and none said Lacey Duvalle. She should be in there too
Where is lovely retired star Georgie Nylons?
What happened with Valerie Kay? Does anyone know?
Dee Baker, Kitten, Solveig, Skin Diamond
You are absolutely correct about Dee Baker and Skin Diamond. Two stunners that put out top shelf material.
Where is the most beautiful Kortney kane
Do you update this list if any of them return to porn?
Absolutely yes, also thanks to your reports
What happen to lia leah aka Ashley Ryan
Hillary Scott, Kelly Wells, Bridgette Kerkove, Ava Devine, Sandra Romain, Naomi…just saying
Calli Cox, Mason Storm, Olivia O’Lovely (best ass in the biz at one time), Jenna Haze, Jill Kelly. Jill is 48 now…I think she would make a great comeback if she returned to perform in the MILF genre.
Anyone heard from Danielle Delaunay?
I’m missing Ash Hollywood, Charlie Laine, Carli Banks, Andie Valentino, Kylee Reese, Kasey Chase, Rebecca Blue, Daisy Marie, Brooke Hunter, Madison Scott, Alektra Blue, Courtney Cummz and Tori Black
Malena Morgan, Shae Snow, Cassie James???
One of the hottest redheads to ever appear on camera, Bree Morgan AKA Bree Roxx. She just disappeared. Glad all of these beauties got out alive.
Brooke Wild, Quinn Wilde, & Ashlyn Rae
Austin Kincaid why nobody remembers her, she was one of the best faces
Thank you, was looking for that name and face.
Francesca Le,Holly Halston,Carmella Bing,Sienna West,are they still active??
August Ames – Deceased but in effect retired
peta jensen…..anna bell peaks…..ohhh fuck Lord LANA RHOADES???
Lana Rhoades is retired now? The world is coming to an end.
Phoenix marie,keisha grey,sasha grey,summer brielle
Jayden jaymes, Stella Cox, Eva lovia,
How about Alyssa Cole Is she still active?
Lana rhoades should also be retired
Some of these retired pornstars still so things like Onlyfans. I haven’t checked most of these but I know Allie Rae is on Onlyfans.
Any one know if Jayden Lee is still active?
According to her Fame Registry Amber Ivy has retired.
Where is Dani Daniels, did she quit. How about Jelena Jenson what happened to her
You mean Jelena Jensen? She has been retired since January 2018.
Dani Daniels? She’s still going as far I know.
Missing Teagan Presley and Lexi Bloom
Kaitlyn Ashley Juli Ashton Chasey Lain Celeste Holly Sampson Harlow Harrison Cameryn Coxxx Mandy Haze Rachel Roxxx Stormy Daniels Peta Jensen Nikki Sinn Jenna Presley Austin Kincaid Kate Frost Axis Evol Jayden Jaymes Kortney Kane Brandi Edwards Crystal Wilder Sana Fey Jeanna Fine Sara Stone Raylene Tabitha Stevens Sydnee Steele Sindee Coxx Juelz Ventura Kayla Paige
Adriana Sage Bree Olson Daisy Marie Julie Meadows Sky Lopez Cytheria
Sarah Vandella Dolly Leigh two of the best
Dakota Skye should retire. She has talked about bringing her younger sister into the business.
Dakota Skye died on the 9th of June 2021.
Mercedes Carrera isn’t retired. She is in prison since 2019.
What ever happened to Jamie Jackson, did she retire?
Skin Diamond Layla Rose Catie Parker Lola Foxx
Is Jelena Jensen retired from Porn?
Jelena Jensen has been retired since 2018.
EUFRAT MAI …SHE’S RETIRED ZUZANA ZELEZNOVOVA…RETIRED GINA DEVINE…RETIRED TRACY LINDSAY..RETIRED
Where is samantha rone she is retired
Tory Lane Chelsea Zinn Sheena Shaw Lezley Zen Cherokee Tianna Lynn (Squirter) Laura Angel Jenny Hendrix Mila Donna Marie Gauge Taylor Rain Militia Leah Luv Rita Faltoyano
Angel del rey Amy shores Raven bay Trinity st clair
Tori black Ivy rose Gabriella Paltrova Michele James Serena avary Avary adair Natasha malkova Mia malkova Chase Ryder Jennifer Jewels Penelope white Dani Daniels Giselle Mari London love Zoey Kush Tiffany Thompson Pepper Xo Ella Knox Nina north Reena sky Kristen Scott Stoney Lynn Britt James Marry Lynn Addie juniper Michele Taylor Kasey Warner Leah jaye Lexi love Bliss dulce Naomi woods Mischa brooks Jezebeth Audrey bitoni
There’s one porn star who’s hasn’t been mentioned….. what about my favorite porn star , Kendra Sunderland ?
Can anybody tell me if Gia Paige has retired or not?
My 2 favorites. Kennedy Leigh and Tiffani Rox (went by many names)
What about Paisley porter, didn’t she retire this year
Taylor Vixen Penny Flame Molly Cavalli Lisa Ann Capri Cavanni Brett Rossi Jelena Jensen Sunny Leone Karlie Montana Barbie Cummings Bree Olson Chanel Preston Layla London Keisha Grey
More retired Pornstars not mentioned
Presley Hart Jayden Jaymes Lizz Tayler Leili Koshi Kinzie Kenner Alexis Ford Jaye Rose Sasha Grey Karlee Grey Piper Perri Gina Lynn Sammie Rhodes Missy Martinez Nicole Aniston Charlotte Stokely Mercedes Lynn Sophia Knight
Her Fame Registry says Charlotte Stokely is retired.
HOW CAN WE FORGET CODY LANE?!?! Maan ohh man, she was somethin special! My favorite growing up. Then Lana Rhoades came out & needless to say, I was addicted.
Cody Lane died on the 9th of January in 2021.
What happened to Gianna Dior/ Emily katherine Correro?
Gianna Dior is still active & not retired as far as I know.
Alexa Grace and Nicole Ray, There is way to may porn stars on here to know if it was mentioned. I don’t blame the retirees. Porn has gotten violent, makes me wonder what they agree to when they signed up to film.
What has happened to Monica Sweet/Jo and Angie George? Thanks mate
Jasmine Summers (getting a degree in physics according to her IG) Nautica Binx Skin Diamond Kacey Kox
What about Savanna Samson, She was the greatest!
How could you forget Silvia Saint and Aria Giovanni??
Silvia Saint is still the most gorgeous woman I’ve ever laid eyes on.
Can’t believe Jenna Jameson was considered to be hotter than SS.
Eva Notty has been retired for a while now.
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