Erotica Massage
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Erotica Massage
Medically Reviewed by Dan Brennan, MD on June 29, 2021
In sexual massage, massage techniques are used in order to arouse or achieve orgasm. It can be part of sexual activity between partners, but it can also be part of sex work, both legal and illegal.
In some practices, sexual massage has a spiritual and even healing component. Both Tantra and ancient Taoism related sexual energy to life force and developed massage techniques meant to promote sexual and spiritual health. Psychotherapists occasionally recommend these practices, both for individuals and people in relationships, in the case of issues that may be psychosexual, such as erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation, and anorgasmia.
Sexual massage between partners can be an enjoyable way to be intimate together. If you’re seeking sexual massage from a professional, it’s important to understand what’s legal in the state or country you’re in before you request service.
Sexual massage may also be called erotic massage or sensual massage.
A “happy ending massage” is a slang phrase that refers to a traditional full body massage that ends with a sex act designed to cause the client to orgasm. In many places around the world, it’s illegal for massage parlors to offer this service.
In addition, there are several types of sexual massage that have their own names, including:
Tantric massage revolves around energy and breath. The goal is to remove blocks and tension within the body that interferes with spiritual and sexual health. Direct genital stimulation may or may not be part of the massage.
The word nuru is Japanese for slippery. During a nuru massage, a person covers themselves in massage oil and lies across the naked body of another person and rubs their bodies together, aiming for maximum contact. This type of service can be part of sex work, and may be illegal in many places.
Lingam (sometimes spelled lingham) and yoni massages are tantric massages that focus on male and female sacred spaces that involve the genitalia. Approaches may differ, but both usually begin with traditional tantric energy work.
A yoni massage then focuses on the female genitals, while the lingam focuses on the penis and prostate.
If you’re interested in exploring sexual massage at home, many retailers offer massage oils for purchase. There are also websites that offer advice for first-time masseurs.
Depending on the type of massage that interests you, you might be better served by a more formal class. Many massage therapists and sex therapists offer private or group classes. Some of these are couples-focused, but others are not.
If you are interested in a professional sexual massage, make sure that your country and/or state allows for the type of practice you’re looking for. Only attend licensed parlors in order to avoid both legal and health issues.
If you are trying sexual massage with a partner, you should follow the same rules you would when giving any other kind of massage. Don’t do anything that risks pain or injury to your partner. Honest, open communication will help you make sure you and your partner are comfortable with the activity and set any boundaries ahead of time.
Cosmopolitan : “How to give a lingam massage.”
The Cut : “A Tantric Masseuse on Sexual Healing.”
Dictionary: “Happy ending massage.”
Glamour : “What is a Yoni Massage?”
International Journal of Criminal Justice Sciences : “Thai Massage Parlors and Commercial Sex Work: A Phenomenological Study.”
Psychology Today : “Tantric and Taoist Practices to Improve Sex.”
Sexual and Relationship Therapy : “Tantric orgasm: beyond Masters and Johnson.”
Vice : “I Got Massaged by a Woman Rubbing Her Greased Up Naked Body All Over My Naked Body.”
© 2005 - 2022 WebMD LLC. All rights reserved.
WebMD does not provide medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.
https://www.thebody.com/article/risk-erotic-massage
You should know: The answer above provides general health information that is not intended to replace medical advice or treatment recommendations from a qualified health care professional.
Recently I have visited an erotic massage salon. Before beginning the massage we took a shower together. The masseuse was naked and washed me, because it was my first time I didn't wash her. She used a different towel for me and herself.
After the shower I laid down on the bed where she first start with a massage of my back with oil. She also touched my anus with oil.
Afterwards she gave me a massage of the front were she gave me a handjob until the end.
Because I didn't want to risk any contact between her vagina and myself, I have asked her to keep her slip on during the massage. At no time there was any sex (nor oral).
However, in her neck she had some red spots because she burned herself on christmas-evening where she has been taken the medication for. The wonde (spots) was dry, there was no blood and I didn't saw her touching her neck or rubbing her neck on my penis.
I must admit that I'm feeling guilty of having this done. I'm also afraid that I could have been at risk for HIV if she would have touched the wonde with her hand and afterwards touched my penis?
The fact that she touched my anus, is there any chance of transmitting HIV if the masseuse would have HIV?
Do I need to test myself after having this massage?
I'm sorry for these questions but you would help me a lot with that...it keeps on turning in my head.
PS: I have read that we can donate to your organisation. Can this also be done if you're living in Europe? I would love to donate.
Your fears are unwarranted. Your HIV-acquisition risk from your rub-and-tug happy-ending massage is nonexistent. HIV testing is not warranted.
Donation information for The Robert James Frascino AIDS Foundation can be found on the foundation's Web site at www.concertedeffort.org. From Europe you can use PayPal, credit cards, direct wire transfer, checks or cash for donations. Thanks for your interest in helping others in desperate need.
Be well. Stay well. Happy New Year.
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Clean and groom yourself. To make the experience as sensual as possible, both of you should feel comfortable, clean, and fresh. Bathe and groom yourself, paying particular attention to your hands and fingernails. Your fingers should be clean and clipped before you give a sensual massage.
If you're giving your partner a massage, consider bathing together to initiate the intimacy. Bathing or showering at the same time can be a great way to get the massage time started.
It can also be fun to start with a massage and then, after things get oily, to hop in the tub afterward and clean off some of that oil.
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Make the massage space comfortable and inviting. Whether you're massaging someone on a professional massage table or on a bed or other surface, it's important to make the person getting the massage as comfortable as possible. Make sure the room is warm enough to be undressed in, if clothes are coming off, and make sure the sheets are clean and fresh. Light some candles and incense to make the room feel special.
It's sometimes common to use hot stones, blindfolds, rolling pins, and a variety of other implements in the massage, but sometimes it's also best to keep it as simple as possible. You don't need to prepare an elaborate display of tools to make the massage sensual and enjoyable for your partner.
Some gentle music can be a welcome addition to a sensual massage, or a corny and uncomfortable mistake. Ask your partner what they would prefer, and avoid the Barry White cliches.
You could also set up a diffuser with a soothing essential oil, like lavender or bergamot. [1]
X
Expert Source
Justyna Kareta Certified Master Massage Therapist
Expert Interview. 10 December 2019.
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Use an appropriate variety of massage oil. While it's possible to give a halfway decent massage without any oil, your partner will be missing out big time. It's much more comfortable and sensual to use a natural massage oil to give a massage.
Commercial massage oils are often scented in a variety of fragrances, which can offer an intense sensual experience for a massage. Some people might prefer unscented oils, but try out a few to see what works best.
You don't have to buy oil specifically made for massage. While it may sound weird, cooking oils like olive, coconut, or cocoa butter can make excellent massage oils. [2]
X
Expert Source
Marty Morales Professional Massage Therapist
Expert Interview. 20 December 2019.
Many masseurs prefer using a basic cooking oil on the skin.
You can also make your own massage oil by submerging lavender, calendula, rosemary, or other fragrant herbs or essential oils in a natural oil yourself. You can save money by mixing up batches of your own and saving it in jars.
Since massage oils soak into the skin, always purchase high-quality oils. Jojoba and almond oil are some good options. [3]
X
Expert Source
Justyna Kareta Certified Master Massage Therapist
Expert Interview. 10 December 2019.
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Talk with your partner first. The most important part of a sensual massage has nothing to do with where to put your hands. A massage won't be sensual if it doesn't involve trust and emotional intimacy. Both before and during the massage, it's important to talk and listen. [4]
X
Expert Source
Marty Morales Professional Massage Therapist
Expert Interview. 20 December 2019.
When you're massaging, ask questions like, "Is that too firm?" or "Does that feel good?" when you move to a new area of the body. Listen and adjust your massage accordingly. [5]
X
Expert Source
Justyna Kareta Certified Master Massage Therapist
Expert Interview. 10 December 2019.
It's also good to avoid turning the massage into an interview. Use your judgment and listen to the sounds your partner makes. Moans of pleasure are good signs, so keep doing what you're doing.
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Warm the oil with your hands. Take a generous portion of oil into your hands and rub it in to warm it up, then gently spread the oil onto the part of your partner that you're massaging. It's generally typical to start with the back and shoulders. [6]
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Research source
Never pour oil directly onto the back of your partner if it's cold. This can be startling and uncomfortable, and it can make your partner feel tense. Warm the oil up yourself and periodically add more, if the skin starts to dry out, or the oil gets worked in.
If you want to heat massage oil, do so only very gently, and always test it on your own skin before applying it directly onto your partner.
Alternatively, you can put the oil bottle in a bowl of warm water to warm it up. [7]
X
Expert Source
Marty Morales Professional Massage Therapist
Expert Interview. 20 December 2019.
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Use firm and even pressure with the palms of your hands. Massage techniques can vary widely, but there's no big secret to making your partner feel good. Use and firm, but gentle touch, rubbing long strokes along your partners muscles. Use the base of your palm to do the bulk of the pushing, and use other parts of your hand to get at the sensitive spots.
Remember that it's important to massage along muscles, not pushing on bones. It doesn't really feel good to push hard onto the point of someone's elbow, but it does feel good to massage the inside of the forearm.
Try an experiment if you've never given a massage before, rubbing your own shoulders and seeing where it feels good. Find these same spots on your partner, and remember how firmly you touched your own shoulder. It should translate.
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Use your thumbs for areas of tension. In general, you want to start the massage by using long, even strokes, then go back to problematic or sore spots to work more with your thumbs. If you find a spot that feels very good to your partner, or that your partner wants you to work harder, switch to your thumbs for extra support and pressure.
Always be gentle, rubbing your thumbs in circular motions along the back of your partner's calves, just above the buttocks, and the lower back area.
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Focus on neglected areas of the body. Everyone knows that it feels good to touch genitals and other erogenous zones. But diving straight to these areas can make for a somewhat crude or hurried massage. [8]
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Research source
Take your time and, as long as your partner is comfortable (communicate!), explore the neglected areas of the body for the most sensual and careful massage you can give. Don't forget about:
The wrists
The arch of the foot
The fingers and palms
The back of the neck
The ears
The back of the knees
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