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From UPTOWN –Let me be frank. There are women who count oral sex as one of their favorite pastimes. Call it an oral fixation or voracious appetite but these ladies relish in the idea of pleasuring their man until he breaks down under the heat of their sexual prowess.
But for many black women, their relationship to oral sex isn’t nearly as pleasureful and free. Growing up in a culture that degrades the act with names like “chickenhead” and the like, some women find it hard to shake the stigma that comes with what should be a routine part of sex.
As a teenager, I learned that a woman that performed oral sex was a whore who “got her knees dirty” and had no respect for herself. I heard this from men and women.
Sure there are exceptions, I assume, for women who are in a relationship and not pleasuring every man they see. But as is the case with most stereotypes demeaning women, people only focus on the most negative scenarios (girls who give head to every man walking) while not even mentioning the cases (like in a relationship) where it is acceptable and even ideal to please your man.
Therefore, my seventeen year-old brain completely shut off the idea of EVER performing oral sex on a boyfriend to my current man’s chagrin.
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Actor Michael Douglas has received praise in recent weeks for his portrayal of Liberace in the HBO biopic Behind the Candelabra , in part due to his somewhat graphic performances of gay sex with co-star Matt Damon. But an extremely candid interview with the Guardian over the weekend is drawing attention to Douglas’ real, heterosexual bedroom practices. Candelabra is the first film the actor has completed since receiving treatment for throat cancer two years ago, and though many assumed the disease was caused by Douglas’s well-known penchant for tobacco and alcohol, he told the Guardian it was the result of giving oral sex to female partners. Can you get cancer from cunnilingus?
Yes. You can get it from any kind of oral sex, for that matter. As Douglas suggests in the interview, a direct link has been shown between the human papillomavirus, which can be transmitted through oral sex, and oropharyngeal cancers. HPV comes in more than 100 different strains, but only a few, such as HPV-16, are among the high-risk set responsible for causing cancer. Most strains cause no symptoms, and most sexually active adults have been exposed to one or more of them. According to the Centers for Disease C ontrol and Prevention, each year in the United States HPV causes an estimated 6,700 cases of oropharyngeal cancers in men and 1,700 in women.
So how does HPV infection, which is often symptomless, cause cancer? As the virus infects the layers of epithelial cells that coat the throat and surrounding areas, it can interrupt the cells’ normal function and cause genetic mutations. If the body’s immune system fails to identify and destroy these abnormal cells, they may continue to grow and ultimately form a cancerous tumor. The CDC notes that factors such as alcohol and tobacco use may aggravate this transformation. According the National Cancer Institute, the development from viral infection to cancer could take “ between 10 and 20 years ,” but “even high-grade lesions [a pre-tumor state] do not always lead to cancer.”
Since 1945, EBONY magazine has shined a spotlight on the worlds of Black people in America and worldwide. Our commitment to showcasing the best and brightest as well as highlighting disparities in Black life has been, and will always be, cornerstone to EBONY.
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This show features a black woman having oral sex with her Muslim girlfriend, because 2018 rocks
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A TV programme has shown a black queer woman giving oral sex for the first time to her lesbian Muslim girlfriend – because it’s 20gayteen , of course.
Last season, The Bold Type , a US drama about women who work at a feminist magazine in New York City, showed Kat Edison – one of the main characters – slowly realising she’s not straight.
The woman who helped her to realise that she was queer was Adena El-Amin, a proud Muslim lesbian artist who wears a hijab and eventually became Kat’s girlfriend.
Refreshingly, complications between the two came from Kat discovering more about her sexual identity and the fact that Adena had a girlfriend, rather than from any attempts to sensationalise lesbians or Islam.
After the gut-wrenching disappointment of the Supergirl cast making fun of fans who ship two of the main characters on that show, LGBT viewers were delighted with Kat and Adena.
And The Bold Type is not holding back in its second season, once again addressing race and sexist double standards, as well as sexual harassment in the workplace and – of course – issues which face same-sex couples.
The Freeform programme dove straight into this latter topic, with Kat and Adena – or “Kadena” to fans of the pair – experiencing some strain in their relationship until Adena finally raised the topic that had been bothering her.
“You are ready to to show me off and introduce me to the world as your girlfriend and and put photos of us all over social media, but then – never mind,” she said.
After some prompting from Kat, she tells her girlfriend: “You’re not ready to go down on me.”
Once Kat’s two best friends, Jane and Sutton, have given her a much-needed pep talk, she has an awkward and lovely conversation with Adena at their place, telling her: “I was a little worried and scared.”
Adena tells her: “I didn’t want to push you to do something that you weren’t ready to do or didn’t want to,” before explaining that “it’s not even the act that matters – it’s you and me being able to have these conversations.
“Talking about it is the most intimate thing.”
Once they’ve communicated properly, the two kiss before taking it to the bedroom – where Kat goes down on her first girlfriend for the first time.
And in the season’s second episode, she tells her best friends what it was like, saying: “It was awesome.
2×02 | “What it was like to go down on Adena?” #Kadena #TheBoldType pic.twitter.com/x30k21LRzP
— Georgia Soares (@GeorgiaSoares) June 13, 2018
“I mean, I was completely freaked out at first,” she explained. “Then I realised I have one of these, and I know what I like. So, I did it.
“And things with Adena are awesome,” she adds, grinning from ear to ear.
There’s even more lesbian representation to look forward to in your 2018 TV shows, in the shape of A Discovery of Witches , coming to Sky 1 later this year.
Celebs you didn’t know have an LGBT sibling
The show will feature Sarah Bishop, a powerful lesbian witch played by Doctor Who and Arrow star Alex Kingston.
Together with her partner, a witch called Emily Mather, Sarah raises her niece Diana, teaching her how to use her powers to fight in a centuries-old struggle between supernatural beings.
Watch Kat and Adena’s fantastic scene here:
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