During Massage

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During Massage
Massage , Self Care / By Alex Grand
/ June 9, 2022 June 9, 2022
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Unintentional erection is a common occurrence many men experience during massage therapy.
As massage therapists work their way from one body part to another. And, they are likely to touch erogenous zones that may cause an erection.
But it’s obviously pretty embarrassing! What do you do if you have an erection during a massage?
Erection is a physiological response to touch and is common with many men at spas. So if you were to develop a boner during a massage, it is nothing to be ashamed of! It happens all the time.
All you need to do is relax during the body massage, and the erection will subside. And you may want to apologize to your massage therapist.
Experts claim that touching a body part during a therapeutic massage can activate the Parasympathetic Nervous System . This can cause the man to experience a full or partial erection. It can even lead to unintentional ejaculation !
While this may be an uncomfortable experience, more experienced therapists know how to handle themselves when it happens. This is because they understand that an erection doesn’t always translate to sexual desire. Nor is intentional on the part of the client while on the massage table.
While this may be an uncomfortable experience, more experienced therapists know how to handle themselves when it happens.
Also, note that arousal can occur in women just like men. The only difference is in female arousal is not visible since women do not have erections as men do.
Despite this biological fact, many men shy from having a therapeutic massage for fear of embarrassment. They will feel embarrassed should they become erect, and this is understandable.
This is where comfort-based therapies and the maturity and confidence of the massage therapist comes in. Addressing the client’s discomfort is something the massage therapist has to handle immediately.
Before we proceed, we must draw a clear distinction between an erotic massage or (erotic-ish massage like Nuru Massage ) that can cause sexual arousal, and a standard massage.
An erotic massage is meant to arouse the patient, create tension, and then release. This is far different from what most spas offer.
Most professional massage therapists don’t offer erotic massage therapy, and they will be offended by the idea if a client makes such a request.
So how do professional massage therapists handle a situation where the client has an erection due to the massage? This is crucial if this is the first time the client is coming for a massage without prior experience.
Before we review the steps to be taken, we need to address why an erection is not ideal for the progress of the session.
If the client becomes uncomfortable due to having an erection, the session will not flow as it should. The massage therapist will not be able to access the pressure point to flex the muscles.
With that being said, if the client shows no embarrassment due to the erection, the massage therapist May not want to mention it. Just continue with the massage as if it is not happening, and it may well go away.
If the client begins to exhibit facial expressions and tension, the massage therapist has to stop the session. At that point, it may be wise to take a break from the massage for a few minutes and let everything calm down.
When a client has a boner, it is normal for massage therapists to feel uncomfortable. Many of may conclude that the man must be thinking about having intercourse with the therapist, but this is not always the case.
Some clients will simply be aroused by the massage and the intense stimulation. For others, it is just a natural reaction to the direct touch on their skin. Particular areas like their inner thighs, armpits, feet, and buttocks.
But what should you do about it if the erection becomes more pronounced?
The first thing you should do is stop the session immediately. Experienced massage professionals know what to do. But the inexperienced ones may be in a state of confusion. If you are not so experienced, stop the session and let the client relax before you continue.
The decision to stop will give the client enough time to relax, and your action will send the right signal. It’s like saying to him in unspoken words, “GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF.”
The decision to stop will give the client enough time to relax, and your action will send the right signal. It’s like saying to him in unspoken words, “GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF.”
If stopping temporarily does not address the situation, stop once again and back off. Speak to the client by making eye contact and maintain an assertive posture. Don’t raise your voice or touch them, as this will be interpreted as aggression.
But, don’t speak with a low voice as they may interpret this as passivity.
In the worst-case scenarios, if the client is beginning to show signs of aggression, end the session. Then make for the exit door immediately.
Assuming the client doesn’t act aggressively. But is as embarrassed as you. Describe the behavior but don’t make a judgment but seek to decide whether he has a sexual intent. Asking questions like
It will send the wrong message and sour his mood. Rather than be accusatory, let the client know that you have noticed. Let him know that he is tensed anytime you touch a certain area.
Then ask him what he feels, even though you already have an idea. This question is important. As it will force the client to clarify his intention without making any judgment call on his own.
The client will then state what they are experiencing. From their answer, you can tell what is running through their mind. Attempting to answer the question for the client is a wrong move.
Rather wait if you have to and let them say what’s on their mind. This is so you can gauge their mental state and decide their true intention. Their reply will give you an accurate assessment of the situation.
Perhaps, their parasympathetic nervous system or sympathetic nervous system caused the reaction.
Unintentional erection during massage is normal and is not necessarily sexual in nature.
That is why massage therapists educate first-time clients before they step into the massage room.
They should also understand that the parasympathetic and sympathetic nervous system is hard to control. Healthy communication is key. And handling the situation with tact and maturity is vital for a successful session.

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Questions Erection during massage — What to do?
The answer you entered for the CAPTCHA was not correct.
I'm a thirty-something man who has a happy but often stressful life. I'd like to get a massage every now and then, but I'm worried about what might happen when I'm virtually naked and being rubbed all over by another person. In other words, I'm worried about getting an erection during a massage. It seems like there would be no way to hide it.
How do I deal with this? How do masseuses deal with this when it happens? Do they expect their male clients to get aroused? Would they think I'm perverted when I'm lying on the table and standing at attention?
It’s understandable that you’re worried about a potential erection during a massage. Erections, no matter how common, can be unpredictable, and hence, a cause of worry. But rest assured, this topic is discussed by massage therapists in training — not because clients who get erections are viewed as perverted, but because it is a normal aspect of anatomy and physiology.
During a massage, as the body relaxes, some people may fall asleep, drool, or pass gas — all of which are completely normal physical responses to tension relief. But, like erections, these normal occurrences are stigmatized socially as embarrassing. The irony is somewhat amusing when you think about it — the goal of massage is to relax, but as your body shows signs of relaxation, you become preoccupied with how those responses may be perceived. Many massage therapists and health care professionals try to normalize these bodily functions and responses to decrease clients’ feelings of anxiety or insecurity.
Many people have learned to associate erections with purely sexual arousal — but, in fact, erections occur for a variety of reasons. They can occur during sleep, when someone is angry or scared, or when someone is deeply relaxed, like during a massage. Reflexive erections, a normal physiological response to touch, relaxation, etc., can go away within minutes. Massage therapist know this and will often simply ignore an erection during a session, as long as the client is behaving appropriately. Some masseuses and/or clients may choose to address the potential issue in advance. As the client, you can discuss the topic with the massage therapist before a session, if it helps soothe your concerns. Some online discussion boards also suggest wearing bikini fit underwear as a preventative and concealing option. One user posted that he will think of an anti-erection inducing topic, like retirement planning, if he feels one coming on.
The bottom line, Stressed — try not to stress about it. You are certainly not alone in your worry. Erections are a normal part of your body’s response to relaxation — and a professional massage therapist will likely be understanding. Therapeutic massage is a great option for stress relief. As such, you may want to check out the Seeking massage therapist for resources on finding a certified massage therapist.
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I have looked extensively across the internet and can't find an answer to my bizarre situation. Almost every time I have a massage I orgasm. It seems to happen the most when they work on the lower part of my back. It is often unpredictable, occurring when I least expect it and am not even aroused. It doesn't matter when my masseusse is male or female either, it just happens.

They aren't necessarily intense orgasms, rather mini ones, but I've sometimes had up to 4 or 5 during a massage.
It has never happened with a friend or partner massaging me either, nothing even close. What is so peculiar about it is that I do not achieve orgasm easily when it comes to oral sex or masturbation. It is achievable, but I have never in my life orgasmed during intercourse and have often had even the most dedicated partners wanna give up trying. I myself put this down to medications, anatomical design and most likely having a few sex issues so am mentally unable to let go.
Can you tell me if i am alone in this? It bothers me in that I almost feel guilty getting a massage as if I was paying for sex, but I really enjoy my massages, orgasm excluded. Thanks for any advice you may be able to offer.
originally written 12.06.2007  •  updated 12.21.2021  •  
You're not alone in this, and it's okay.
Remember that orgasm is primarily an event that occurs in, and is about, the nervous system . Yes, most people have most of their orgasms due to stimulation that is about or includes genital stimulus. But not all people, and again, for most, it's not JUST about that stimulation, but about whole body and whole mind stuff.
Reaching orgasm due to massage really isn't bizarre. Think about it: all the right factors are in place. You're relaxed, you feel safe, you're being attended to, and with what you're experiencing, you're having orgasms when parts of your spine and lower back muscles are getting stimulus, parts of your body which are massively tied to your nervous system. Too, you're not in a situation where you'll be feeling any performance pressure. Some of what I'm hearing when you talk about sexual partners is you feeling partners become very frustrated with you when you don't reach orgasm, and that scenario is bound to make you feel pressured. Orgasm and sexual response doesn't tend to respond well to performance concerns and pressures.
When it comes to when you are NOT reaching orgasm, a majority of women do not reach orgasm from vaginal intercourse . That's not abnormal: it's more common than not, and isn't surprising since vaginal intercourse by itself doesn't often stimulate our most sensitive parts, and for those which it can stimulate, often doesn't stimulate them as well as other activities can. And if any kind of sex you're having isn't really taking your whole body into account -- not just your genitals -- that would also be something that is likely a barrier to orgasm for you, and which is a barrier for many women. In fact, bodywork and massage are often one suggestion commonly made for anorgasmic women.
We can't make a lot of generalized, unilateral statements about human sexuality, but one of the few we can make is that human sexuality is incredibly individual and incredibly diverse.
I don't see a reason for you to feel guilty for your response to massage. Most bodyworkers fully recognize that sexuality and relaxation are very linked, and also don't expect clients to try and control their own physical responses to bodywork. They're also very comfortable with what happens spontaneously with people's bodies: they have to be. You're not manipulating them into doing sexwork when that isn't what they want to do: your body is responding as it is, beyond your control, to normal, nonsexual massages.
I should probably also mention that it's possible what you're experiencing isn't even orgasm at all, but instead, uterine contractions. Those are also normal with lower back bodywork.
Too? It sounds to me like if you KNOW massage is something that works for you, why not bring that to the table with partners and make massage part of the sex you're having, rather than viewing things as sex OR massage? For all you know, this might be one of the better discoveries you'll make in your sexual life: see it as a positive!
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A massage therapist should help you to relax and ease your physical pain, not cross boundaries. If you feel you were violated during a massage, here’s how experts say you can start to heal, and call for accountability.
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A couple of years ago, some friends and I discussed bad massages. “The massage therapist kept checking her phone,” one huffed, while another spoke about how a therapist’s bad breath had made her nauseous. I shared a story about a massage therapist that skated her fingertips across my shoulders for 30 minutes while she hummed to herself. We laughed at the ridiculousness of these events as we tossed back white wine. Back then, It seemed like a bad massage was, at worst, a waste of time and money.
Then, last spring, I woke up with a kink in my neck. Linking it to the long run I did the previous day, I decided that I needed a massage , and I needed it now. After browsing online for availability, I opened the Groupon app to find a screaming deal on massages at a local business. The place had positive reviews in the app and on Yelp. After purchasing the special, I called up the business and the receptionist raved about a massage therapist who had an opening that afternoon. I booked the appointment with him.
After entering the little massage room, the massage therapist asked me if I wanted to target any area in particular. I told him I was sore in my neck, hips, and back. He left the room and I got undressed down to my bikini brief cut underwear. I lay down on the heated massage table face down, my body covered with a white sheet, and tried to relax. After he knocked, he entered the room. We made small talk for a bit, and when he made a joke and I didn’t laugh, he put extreme pressure in the center of my back. He then spat out, “That was supposed to be funny.”
The massage continued, and anger seeped out of him with every touch. At first, I was in shock, but it felt like every manipulation was about aggression , rather than relaxation and release of tension. It was overwhelming. I told him the pressure was too much, but he continued to dig his fingers and knuckles into my body with vehemence. At one point he positioned my hipster cut underwear into a thong and massaged my buttocks for what felt like 15 minutes. He then proceeded to rub my chest hard, in close proximity to my nipples.
I lay there with tears in my eyes, unable to find my voice. It was like there was a clamp on my voice box. I wanted to kick him in the groin and scream, but it felt like there was an invisible force pinning me to the table. I couldn’t move. As the massage continued, I dissociated from my body. Short films of my past experiences with sexual assault flooded my mind and I watched each one, petrified and in disbelief.
After the massage, I felt defeated and ashamed. My brain kicked into overdrive with questions that I couldn’t answer. Did I experience sexual assault? Should I report him to the manager? I had always considered myself a feminist, but does a feminist allow themselves to be violated in the #MeToo era?
Clinical psychologist and author of The Complex PTSD Workbook Arielle Schwartz tells Allure via email, “Too often, victims get blamed in our culture. That translates into unrealistic expectations toward ourselves. Self-compassion is so very, very important.”
The same evening of my appointment, I called the massage business and spoke to the receptionist. I explained what happened during my appointment, how it made me
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