Duke Energy Outage Blamed on Squirrel

Title: The Great Duke Energy Outage

On a sweltering summer afternoon in Charlotte, North Carolina, the unthinkable happened—Duke Energy’s grid faltered. At 2:37 PM, a sudden power outage plunged half the city into darkness. Traffic lights flickered off, air conditioners sighed to a stop, and office workers groaned as their computers died mid-email.

The Cause?
A squirrel—dubbed 'Sir Nibbles the Unlucky' by local news—had chewed through a critical transformer line. Backup systems failed when an overloaded substation overheated. Within minutes, Duke Energy’s outage map lit up like a Christmas tree (ironically, without power).

Chaos Ensues

Restaurants: Free ice cream giveaways turned into sticky disasters.

Hospitals: Emergency generators roared to life, but one nurse later admitted, 'We had to do surgery by phone flashlight for, like, three terrifying minutes.'

Social Media: #DukeOutage trended as people posted memes of cavemen, asking, 'Is this how you lived, Grandpa?'

Duke Energy’s Response
After an hour of frantic troubleshooting, CEO Lynn Good issued a statement: 'We sincerely apologize. The squirrel has been… dealt with.' (Later clarified: relocated, not harmed.) Crews worked overnight, and by dawn, power was restored—along with the city’s WiFi, sanity, and refrigerators.

The Aftermath
Duke Energy pledged $10 million to 'squirrel-proof' infrastructure. Meanwhile, Sir Nibbles became a local legend, with a mural painted in his honor. And Charlotte? They learned two things: always backup your files, and never underestimate nature’s tiny saboteurs.

Moral of the Story:
Even the mightiest grids can fall—but at least it makes for a great story.

(Inspired by real events… but heavily dramatized.) ⚡🐿️

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