Drawn the short stick, young internal medicine nurse to station isolation wards: won’t run away, as this is our duty

(25 Jan)In 2003, the mainland-originated SARS killed 299 Hong Kongers, including 6 public medical heroes.  17 years later, today, the new Wuhan Coronavirus has spread across China with 1,300 confirmed cases and 41 dead.  Hong Kong records 5 confirmed cases.  Public hospitals are hurrying for the upcoming epidemic outbreak by preparing isolation wards.

Ah Fai (pseudonym), a public hospital internal medicine nurse with 2 years of experience, was picked in the lots drawing to join the first batch of medical personnels to work in the isolation wards, the frontline to fight against the new Wuhan Coronavirus.

Facing the prospect of death, Ah Fai, a twenty-odd youngster, was interviewed by The Stand News to talk about his family, girlfriend, and job with tears dimming his eyes.  Though worrying much, he keeps having unbounded imagination and expectation towards the future.

“I am not throwing my life away-- I am going to help people, but I have to be prepared for the worst.”

When told he was picked, he shed tears in face of life’s burden

The Hospital Authority doesn’t have any standard lots drawing mechanism.  Each hospital has its own way to decide the work shifts in isolation wards.  But they are all about the same.  Ah Fai, who is working in a top-tiered hospital in the Kowloon Central Cluster, said that hospitals would usually make the drawing by paper lots according to tenure or odd/even numbers, etc.  Some hospitals will arrange the youngest nurses first to work in the isolation wards.  “The good way to put it is vanguard; the bad way to put it is sacrifice,” said Ah Fai.

Ah Fai was off duty on the day when the lots were drawn.  He was suddenly told, via Whatsapp, he was picked to be part of the first batch personnel to work in isolation wards, to cure the patients who get infected with the new Wuhan Coronavirus.  Although the drawing was video-recorded, Ah Fai was upset he was just informed (without his presence) that he was so picked when he was not mentally ready to go.

“Will I still have a chance to leave the isolation wards?  What will happen inside?  What will my future become?” Ah Fai had these 3 questions in his mind at that moment.

Ah Fai said that he would take the job definitely if he had no family and girlfriend, as being a nurse to cure patients is his dream.  However, Ah Fai also has his emotion in reality with everything cannot bear to lose.  Whenever he imagines that he gets infected, or even dies and has no more chance to take care of his family and leaving his girlfriend, Ah Fai would have countless, unchecked emotional feelings.  On the day having dinner with his girlfriend, Ah Fai’s tears were shed when he heard from his girlfriend: “I will support you forever, though I worry.”

Instead of Lunar New Year blessing, talked about life insurance with colleagues

Apart from himself, some of Ah Fai’s young colleagues were also picked to be part of the first batch isolation wards medical personnel.  They commented that, before the drawing, everything seemed far away from them, who were just discussing news with colleagues, criticizing the government’s medical policies.

After the drawing, only silence, sorrow and sighing were left in their conversations.  They discussed more about personal affairs that needed to be arranged after getting infected, and looked for life insurance products.

All the typical Lunar New Year blessings disappeared from Ah Fai and his colleagues.  Whenever the anxiety of “dying in the isolation wards” is triggered, Ah Fai and his colleagues only had few “encouraging” words – “don’t worry much, we will win and get out of there”.  Nevertheless, everyone knows there is no guarantee.

Over the nights, Ah Fai thought repeatedly whether he should resign from the job, and this reminded him why he chose to be a nurse.  “Curing and rescuing patients” has all along been Ah Fai’s belief as well as the first responsibility of a nurse.

Professional nurses will not escape from the field, “if necessary, we will go, I will go, just to go despite not willing to,” said Ah Fai.  Ah Fai accepted the consequence of working in isolation wards, and joked that this might be his destiny.

Treasure every moment with family.  Ah Fai: “There may not be a next Lunar New Year gathering.”

SARS that happened 17 years ago is very remote from Ah Fai.  However, he remembered that his mother needed to soak all clothing in disinfectant and apply alcohol sanitizer to her body, before entering the home from hospital where she was working at.  After confirming to be working in isolation wards, Ah Fai told his parents, who just asked him to be careful, without any overreaction as, at that time, the epidemic was not very serious.  However, following the increasing number of suspected and even confirmed cases, Ah Fai’s parents become more worried about him.  At the same time, Fai’s parents showed their support over Ah Fai’s job, and even are proud of it.

Ah Fai also gets mentally well-prepared that, once he starts working in isolation wards, he will not be able to go home at night and see his girlfriend.  He will treat himself as an isolated patient and stays in the residence arranged by the Hospital Authority, till the epidemic is over or his job is taken over by other colleagues.  Ah Fai added that some hospitals would relieve the isolation wards personnel every half year.  Although he cannot go home, he could entertain himself by counting down the days to see his loved ones again.

On Lunar New Year’s Day, Ah Fai and his girlfriend paid an annual visit to his parents, Ah Fai took more photos with everyone and treasured every moment of chatting.  In the interview, Ah Fai couldn’t hold back his tears, and paused for a moment before resuming, “it was because I didn’t know if this Lunar New Year is the last one for me.”

“I try harder to treasure every moment with my family, and make an effort to memorise this moment as I never know if there will be another annual visit.”

Ah Fai cannot bear to lose the most is his mother.

Ah Fai always keeps in his mind to ask his mother to take medicines on time and abstain from the wrong foods.  He worries mostly he may not have another chance to look after his sick mother once he enters the isolation wards.

As the virus remains an unknown, mainlanders squeeze medical resources in Hong Kong

As a starting internal medicine nurse without any SARS epidemic experience, Ah Fai can only figure things out by trials and errors.  Even now many medical personnel have nearly zero knowledge about the new Wuhan Coronavirus.  Management of the Hospital Authority just keeps saying the obvious, such as washing hands (for patients and medical personnel), etc.  Ah Fai felt helpless, as nobody gave any further advice after the drawing.

It is not new to have the internal wards fully occupied.  Bed packing has become a permanent practice.  Ah Fai can’t imagine what will become of the isolation wards at the peak of the epidemic.  He worries that the situation at the hospital will turn into a catastrophe if internal wards are converted into isolation wards.

Pursuant to Section 1.1 of the Code of Ethics and Professional Conduct for Nurses in Hong Kong, “Nurses serve all individuals irrespective of their age, gender, race, nationality, colour, political background, ethnicity, religion, health status, sexual orientation, lifestyle, socio-economic status or any other attributes.”

Ah Fai indicated that, many mainlanders came over to Hong Kong Accident & Emergency Department (A & E) for treatment in recent years, overloading the public hospitals.  In the morning following the lockdown of Wuhan, various medical groups observed that a large number of mainlanders went to the A & E for treatment.  This is extremely selfish, “if you are sick, why didn’t you stay behind and get treatment from your local hospitals, but instead travelled around and got to Hong Kong to see a doctor?”

Facing the hardship of tight manpower, shortage of resources, and fully occupied beds, Ah Fai questioned, “why do I need to sacrifice my life to serve such people?”

Future plan – proposing marriage to girlfriend after the epidemic and joining the Doctors Without Borders (MSF)

When talking about future, the twenty-odd youngster showed his unbounded imaginations over many things, including the epidemic and self-expectation, and he has so many life goals to be achieved.

Ah Fai’s girlfriend accompanied him for the interview, and got heartfelt-touching and tears down after listening to Ah Fai’s words.  

Ah Fai said, he had already had the plan of marriage.  After confirming he would need to work in isolation wards, he pushed himself to give this up, as he didn’t want to drag his girlfriend down, wishing she would have a better future.  However, Ah Fai promised he will propose to his girlfriend once he overcomes the epidemic.

Dreams can only be achieved with courage.  The epidemic gave Ah Fai a chance to look deeply into the value of life, inspired him to live bravely, and coloured a brilliant life. Ah Fai will join the MSF as a nurse after winning this battle, and this is his dream job.  “If everyone can overcome the epidemic, this will enhance my courage to try making my dream come true,” said Ah Fai.

Before entering the isolation wards, Ah Fai wishes to meet more friends and have chats with them.  He will spend all the time with his family and girlfriend in the last night prior to his new duty, with a simple dinner and photo with them.  “It is most important to me to have my cared and loved ones with me.”

Reporter: CHOI Chun Kit, TANG Ho Ying

Photographer: Peter WONG

Filming: Fred CHEUNG

Source: Stand News

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