Doctor Whore

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Doctor Whore
Sex. Celebrity. Politics. With Teeth
Sex. Celebrity. Politics. With Teeth
Coming Soon: A Doctor Who Porn Parody Called 'Doctor Whore'
It took fifty years, but the world is finally getting a Doctor Who porno parody. It's called... long, tired sigh ... "Doctor Whore — The XXX Parody." The teaser logo, as you can see, replaces the TARDIS with a shiny, jizzing dick.
It's the work of WoodRocket, the company that previously foisted a SpongeBob Squarepants porno upon the world. "We love Doctor Who and want to pay homage to this brilliant series. And add space vaginas," said director Lee Roy Myers in the company's announcement. Can't wait to see a sonic screwdriver caressing the nebula-like clitoris of a space vagina! (By which I mean I would happily go the rest of my life seeing no such thing.)
Casting begins this week; the final product will stream online for free.
The longer you consider this, the less surprising it is. We've got an off-kilter dude who spends long periods zipping through space and time with a succession of attractive young women. Sure, you get innocent pairings, but there's always been a lot of sexual tension on this show, considering its supposed family friendliness. No doubt fanfic has been exploring this for decades . Can you imagine the fever pitch it would've reached if they had actually gotten Benedict Cumberbatch ? It's not much of a leap to imagine the Doctor and his companions leapfrogging from decadent orgy to decadent orgy, boning merrily all the while.




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Doctor Who is one of the longest running shows in the history of television, and also one of the most sexless. While other science fiction franchises often tell stories in which a guy like Captain Kirk gets the girl, Doctor Who usually tells the story of a guy hanging out in a box with a series of beautiful women whom he has absolutely no interest in beyond basic friendship.
In other words, it’s a perfect target for porn parody, and it’s happening as a porn parody web series.
As you’d expect, they’re calling the parody Doctor Whore and it’s being produced by director Lee Roy Meyers. Meyers’ previous credits include a Game of Thrones parody called Game of Bones . I imagine the whole thing must have been very uncomfortable for Varys.
The surprising thing about Doctor Whore is what a great job they’ve done on casting. Some of the "actors" involved, whether through makeup or just plain bone structure (see what I did there), actually look a lot like the Doctor Who characters they’re parodying.
For example, they’ve gone with parodying the most recent, Matt Smith incarnation of the Doctor in particular. Here’s Brian Street Team in the part alongside the porn version of River Song as picked up by GFR …
And here’s the real Doctor as played by Matt Smith…
Watch a Safe For Work trailer for the series and check out the porn versions of Rose Tyler, Martha Jones, and Amy Pond on the next page... Here’s the porn Rose Tyler…
Keep going to watch a completely safe for work Doctor Whore trailer, which, unbelievably, actually exists. Click the image below to watch the safe for work trailer for Doctor Whore ...
Or if you're in a very NSFW mood, the first four episodes of Doctor Whore are already available online at WoodRocket.com for free. While this page is safe for work, their site definitely is NOT. Enter at your own risk.
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For all the successes that the Doctor has managed to pull off during his journeys through time and space, his greatest accomplishments have always been his choices in companions. Since Doctor Who firs
For all the successes that the Doctor has managed to pull off during his journeys through time and space, his greatest accomplishments have always been his choices in companions. Since Doctor Who first aired in 1963, the Doctor never ran short on having a solid choice of characters tagging along on his journeys in the TARDIS, but there's been a trend in his companions that can't be denied. It's always been the female characters who stole the show.
In fact, this extends beyond his companions, but to the whole of the female character pantheon, in general, who have shown up on the Doctor's timeline since the show's inception. Even though the Doctor himself is the focal point of the show, you can't deny the fact that he'd really never have gotten as far on his journeys without the various women he's met along the way. Well, you can deny it — you'd just be wrong.
So, yes, we love the Doctor, and we always will, but the Doctor's already had his time (literally, in Matt Smith's swan song, The Time of the Doctor ). Right now, the ladies of Who deserve some acknowledgement. So keep reading to discover the 15 reasons why the women of Doctor Who make the show.
Clara Oswald — the governess, the nanny, the teacher, the companion — is an eager adventurer with an appetite for anything that isn't the status quo. She started off on the show as a mystery that the Doctor was determined to solve, and as it turned out, the very core of her mystery was in saving the Doctor by sacrificing herself in one of the most self-destructive ways possible. Where others might have fled, Clara ignored her own well being in order to save her best friend, and ultimately saving the entire universe in the process.
Clara trudged through misery after misery throughout her life. She lost her parents, the love of her life, Danny Pink, even the Doctor (technically speaking). But she also persevered. Always. In fact, had it not been for her, the Doctor may very well have lost hope during his travels after losing the Ponds to the Weeping Angels.
Now, here's an interesting addition to the Doctor Who universe. Yes, she's a companion of the Doctor, but more significantly, Romana (short for Romanadvoratrelundar) is, like the Doctor, a Time Lord from Gallifrey. She traveled with Tom Baker's Fourth Doctor and proved to be quite the fascinating travel-pal. Whereas most companions would be blown away by the wonder that is traveling with the Doctor, Romana offered more of a "been there, done that" sort of vibe. Seeing as she's literally "been there" and "done that."
During her travels with the Doctor, we got the chance to see two very different versions of the character because, being a Time Lord, she has the power to regenerate — which she ends up doing. During this new incarnation of the character, Romana II is a bet less stubborn and ends up bonding a bit more with the Doctor. However, that's not to say she loses her way. Romana was an equal to the Doctor, and a desperately necessary one at that.
The world needs more Donna Nobles. Instead of being blindly impressed by the Doctor's fascinating gizmos and gadgets, Donna Noble is instead fascinated with how full of himself he is. A haplessly ambitious woman with dreams sometimes beyond her own comprehension, Donna was everything that the Doctor never realized he needed. During a phase in his journeys where he might have resorted to despair, Donna showed up to essentially snap him out of his woes — even though she hadn't done so intentionally. She and the Doctor ended up becoming two people who didn't realize they desperately needed each other and, as a result, essentially saved each other's lives.
Donna Noble embodies the side of people that they wish they were brave enough to let out. She's pleasantly brash, ridiculously hilarious, and she hardly embodies the damsel in distress stereotype so way too many TV shows and movies force female characters into. If nothing else, Donna is a breath of fresh air, and Doctor Who is lucky to have had her.
A story is nothing without a complicated character, and that's exactly what Harriet Jones is. Showing up in the revival season of Doctor Who back in 2005 with Christopher Eccleston's Ninth Doctor, Harriet Jones first enters the show as an ambitious Member of Parliament, but her story arc takes quite a rocky turn when she ends up becoming Prime Minister of Great Britain. She makes choices as Prime Minister that are questionable at best, but making her a likable character wasn't the point. She was realistic. She made choices as any leader would, and as a result, she often made mistakes. To hell with perfection; Harriet Jones was human.
Ultimately sacrificing herself for the greater good, Harriet Jones proves to be one of the few characters on Doctor Who is imperfect to the point that fans might even go so far as to absolutely dislike her. But she never intended to be liked. She only ever intended to try her best and do the right thing.
It's only natural that a medical student would travel with the Doctor, and that's exactly what happens when Martha Jones boards the TARDIS. Above everything else, Martha is someone whose sole purpose seems to be wanting to save people. It's just that after joining the Doctor, she realizes that her skills may not be quite as proficient as their subsequent adventures require. However, it's through understanding these faults that Martha discovers her most significant quality: her common decency. In a universe filled with monsters, Martha Jones is a woman who refuses to give up when so many people need saving.
Though her time on the series is relatively short-lived, Martha Jones doesn't give up after she decides to leave the TARDIS. She uses the knowledge she's acquired on her travels to put some good into the world — and into the universe — all the while being a bonafide badass.
When you're part of a species that's forced to constantly live on the defense, it's difficult to level with people. People tend to judge you right off the bat, and as a result, it's not exactly easy getting on people's good sides — not that Madame Vastra cares whether or not you like her in the first place. But the thing is, Madame Vastra is hardly as hard and sinister as a Silurian battle mask. She's a survivor, and she has no time for your bullsh*t, sorry to say.
Madame Vastra is an outsider, even in a show filled to the brim with outsiders. First, people fear her. Then, once they've gotten to know her, they're put off by her. But if you're good to her, the feeling is typically mutual. It's just that she's not the kind of character who feels as though she needs to be pleasant in order to earn your respect. Either take her as she is or back the hell off. #Amen
Not unlike Madame Vastra, Ace is a survivor. The only difference between the two is that Ace is a 16-year-old human with a predisposition for danger. She's got an adventurer's soul, and though getting herself into trouble is pretty much her m.o., she's eager to learn and eat up everything that her travels with the Doctor offers her. She's young and wily, but she's loyal.
The thing is, Doctor Who is a show that is targeted at people in all walks of life. So, yes, it doesn't hurt to have someone that teenage girls can personally relate to. She's imperfect and sometimes in need of guidance (or just a friend, really). Though her time on the show was cut short, seeing as the show itself was cut short, she managed to make a name for herself in the series. Her roots were tragic, which might explain her behavior at times, but she managed to leave her past where it belonged, ultimately growing in significant ways in the short time she spent with the Doctor.
If you're going to travel through time and space, you ought to have a strong head on your shoulders — and that's precisely what Tegan had when she took off with the Doctor in the TARDIS. If you had plans of trying to get one over on Tegan, then by all means, good luck with that. Not unlike Donna Noble, when Tegan has something on her mind, she damn well says it, and to hell with you if you can't handle that sort of personality.
Aside from being a solid counterpart to the Doctor — the Fourth, especially (she travels with both Four and Five) —she's a significant part of Doctor Who because of how resilient she is to nonsense and essentially anyone who believes that she's incapable or otherwise overwhelmed by the dangers she's confronted with. She's the kind of companion who will prove herself just for the sake of proving herself; something most people who have ever been underestimated can relate to.
There's nothing worse than being misunderstood, and Amy Pond spends most of her life being exactly that. However, there's a sense of comfort in having a character as fleshed out as Amy Pond (even though it took till the end of her run on the show to get there). She can be a stubborn at times, but loyal and perpetually fascinated. She's as commanding as she is conflicted, and throughout her run on Doctor Who , Amy Pond proves that simply being alive is complicated — whether you're a human on earth or an alien creature beyond the stars.
Amy Pond represented some perfect examples of human conflict, not the least of which being her relationship with the two most important people in her life: the Doctor and Rory Williams. She makes bad decisions at times, but she's always willing to accept when she's wrong (even if it takes a little while to get there). Above all else, though, if you had to sum up Amy Pond is single word, "bold" ought to do the trick.
Before there was anyone else in the TARDIS with the Doctor, there was his granddaughter, Susan. With her, we were given the first proper window into life with the Doctor. We got a glimpse into his madness. But Susan’s also incredibly vital because with her, we had someone to latch onto. She was first of many characters in the show that audiences would be able to live vicariously t
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