Difficult Sex Position
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Difficult Sex Position
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Sexual positions are a slippery slope. Personally, I straddle two extremely conflicting camps: I like to experiment with new sex positions aka some of the crazier varieties (because YOLO), but I also tend to stand by the theory that simpler can indeed be just better ( looking at you, missionary !) And since everyone is different, it's hard to always judge which ones you need to give a whirl and which are just really not worth the hype at all .
No matter which camp you fall in, there are always those sex positions that are just insanely overrated. Like Carrie Bradshaw once said, the last time anyone enjoyed the 69 position was in 1969. (And they probably didn't even like it then to be brutally honest.) Some are just straight up so bad, no one is going to get off anywhere except the bed you're trying them on. And that's OK, just there are about a million others to choose from. Not to mention the fact that the clumsy positioning can be a total bonding moment between you and your partner.
But you obviously don't want to make a habit of awkward, difficult positions if you're hoping to get some orgasms flowing. Here are the five sex positions, that in my eyes, just don't exactly tickle my fancy — or anything else for that matter.
How To Do It: This one starts out similar to reverse cowgirl, your partner on their back while you straddle them — except you're straddling one of their knees.
Why It's Hard : Even though you're on top, it requires you to do some, well, heavy lifting — and be pretty damn limber. In other words, this one may be fine for an appetizer, but not the entire meal.
How To Do It: Your partner lies as if they were about to attempt a side plank, while you just drape your legs (And basically booty) over them. Then your partner shimmies on down inside you.
Why It's Hard: The positioning of this one isn't as hard as the fact I just feel like we're both watching Netflix, and not having sex per se. Also, the "shimmy" that needs to happen is more difficult to achieve than you think, as is the actual thrusting. It sorta lies more on the gal to get that going since your partner is at a more awkward angle.
How To Do It : Start out in missionary with your partner on their knees, before they pull your hips towards their pelvis while you arch your back. Not Cirque du Soleil style or anything, but enough where you have a pretty decent arch going so you can then can lift your butt up to rest on your partner's thighs.
Why It's Hard: Well, for one, there’s the abs element. Don’t get me wrong, I love a Pilates class, but not when I'm having sex necessarily. The more I’m concentrating on my lower ab contractions and how it’s making me want to pass out, the less I’m concentrating on orgasming. Oh, and then there's the fact my butt kept slipping in between my partner's legs when I did attempt this, which was totally hilarious, but also a bit of a mood-killer. To me, there's a lot of bells and whistles here and it can all be far better accomplished by merely adding one key tool: a pillow.
How to do it: Big spoon, little spoon ya'll! Your partner curls up behind you, and the two of you wriggle yourself to the point where you're basically doing a "make love" version of doggy-style. Which totally sounds like an oxymoron, but you get the point.
Why It's Hard: You have no idea how much I want to this one to work; in theory, I love everything about this position: it's sorta like cuddling, hands have easy access to clitoral stimulation. It seems to have it all, right? Well, except the part of aligning yourself like LEGOs to make penetration from behind work. For some reason, clicking it right together can be difficult to, well, click. And after a few "wait, wait — try this. No, that's not it" attempts, I just start to get annoyed.
How To Do It: Remember those crab relay races from grade school? Well it's like that, but you're naked. And rather than running away from each other, you're inching closer to the other. Once you get yourself up on your arms an legs, you and your partner walk towards each other like two actual crabs, before adjusting your hip height enough for insertion.
Why It's Hard: Honestly, what is even going on here? Even if I overlook that this sexual position doubles also the name of an STD, it's just plain difficult, Your arms and legs are holding your body weight up, and getting those pelvises to stay even is no easy feat for the long haul. If you have the stamina, more power to you, but me and my triceps scream a big no to this one.
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These might seem complicated, but they're actually pretty easy. They're also super hot.
Everyone wants to know how to make their sex life more exciting. But the truth is, spicing up your sex life doesn’t need to include elaborate role-playing or buying tons of sex toys. A simple change, such as trying a new position other than the standard missionary, can do the trick and boost your sexual ego, says sexologist Eric Marlowe Garrison , author of Mastering Multiple Position Sex .
But what if these positions look incredibly challenging, or better-suited to, well, more limber folk? Never fear, Garrison says. “Some people do extreme sex positions for the bragging rights, even if they’re not bragging to anyone else,” he says. But with a few minor adjustments, some of the most difficult — and stimulating — positions are a lot easier than they look.
Here's how you can tackle five sex positions that you might be too scared to try at home, complete with tips for each one from Garrison.
Garrison likens this position to the elementary school crab walk. To start, one partner lays flat on the bed, while the other sits on top. The partner on top extends backwards until they are almost laying on their back. This position is great because it offers greater stimulation to the G-spot , says Garrison; plus, if one of you has mobility problems, it takes pressure off your knees.
Start in the missionary position, then get on your knees in prayer position, says Garrison. Then pull your partner up, so their upper back is resting on the bed with their stomach and groin elevated. You can use your partner's thighs to support your weight if need be. This move doesn’t require a lot of thrusting and it allows for slower penetration, which can be very pleasurable, according to Garrison.
A variation on the Wedge, this position doesn’t require as much core strength for the receiving partner. Have your partner lie down on a cushion or couch so they're at about the same height as your pelvic area. Instead of resting on your partner’s thighs, pull your partner's knees up over your shoulders. This position works well for couples who might have a few extra pounds, according to Garrison.
Everyone wants to try having sex standing up, but it's not as easy as it may seem. Garrison recommends starting by standing with your back against the wall. Have your partner face you and straddle one of your legs. It'll be easier for them to maintain their balance that way instead of having to straddle both.
In the movies, you'll often see sex scenes where one partner has both legs wrapped around the other partner while they're having sex standing up, ays Garrison. But this isn’t easy for most people to do. Instead, he advises one partner to sit on something fairly high, like a washing machine, while the other person stands in front of them. That allows the seated person to easily wrap their legs around their partner's torso.
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Yes, you can totally pull these off.
So you’ve mastered missionary and and done it a bazillion times already. It may even be your go-to by now. There's nothing wrong with that (there's a reason so many people are into it), but if you've got the urge to switch things up, you're not alone.
Remember: Experimentation and discovery are important parts of a healthy sex life, explains Donna Oriowo , PhD, a Maryland-based sex therapist. "Our bodies are constantly changing," Oriowo says. "The things that we did when we were younger may not work for us in the same way as when we're older."
This means that our bodies' wants, desires, and abilities will evolve naturally over time. "And we want to make sure that we're able to take full advantage of that," Oriowo says.
The next time you’re about to have sex, instead of resorting to your go-to moves, consider whipping out one of these crazy—or as we like to think about them, upgraded—sex positions.
If you’re into something more acrobatic, you can give the Butter Churner or the Standing Wheelbarrow a try. Or if you want a little more support during your next rendezvous, ask your partner to have sex Table-Top style. And if you want a full sensory experience, you’re going to want to try the Scoop Me Up, so that your S.O. can sneak in some neck kisses and caressing during sex. Trust: These positions will elevate your sex game and result in the toe-curling, back-arching orgasm you're looking for.
Shoutout to back support. If you want a position that's pleasurable and comfy, this one's a great option, says Oriowo. But don't take the level of comfort to mean the position is boring."It's great for viewing pleasure, especially if you do it in front of a mirror," Oriowo adds. This way, you get to watch yourself getting off.
Do it: Your partner sits on the edge of the bed and you sit on them, facing away.
Being eye-to-eye with your partner while making each other feel good is key for intimacy . "And there's that chest-to-chest aspect, as well" that Oriowo says brings it up a notch. The best part? Once you've mastered this position in private, you can take it for a spin outdoors. "Maybe one day you can do this one with some clothes on in places where you're trying to look discreet," Oriowo suggests.
Do it: You straddle them, wrapping your legs around their body (they keep their knees unlocked and thighs spread slightly). They stand and support you in their arms. You can start in a seated position and have them pick you up without disengaging. (Or for the truly bold, you can hop aboard from standing position!)
" I believe that doggy style is always in style," Oriowo says. The key to making it less basic? Incorporate some back play. People don't realize how hypersensitive they are on their back. So the next time you're doing it doggy style, have your partner glide a feather along your back during penetration. It's guaranteed to hype up the sensation. And as bonus—this position guarantees easy hair access. "If you're looking for pressure but not pain, grab from the root. And if you're looking for a bit more pain in that pleasure, grab from the end," Oriowo suggests.
Do it : Get on all fours, then have your partner kneel behind you, with their upper body straight up or slightly draped over you (ya know, like a humping dog).
Okay, okay, so this is basically spoon sex. But don't underestimate the position. There's a few easy ways to turn up the heat—starting with ear and neck play. "I believe that sex should be a full sensory experience wherever possible," Oriowo says. This position allows your partner to play into your ear and neck sensitivity (via kissing or whispering) while they're scooping you up and holding you close. Three words: Full body access.
Do it: Both of you lie on your sides, facing the same direction. You bring your knees up slightly while your partner slides up behind your pelvis and enters you from behind.
There's this intense coming together that creates serious intimacy, Oriowo points out. Plus, it's an ideal position to give your clitoris the attention it deserves by reaching down with your free hands and pleasuring yourself at the same time.
Do it: Sit on the bed facing each other with legs forward. Lift your partner’s right leg over your left and lift your right leg over their left. Come together so they can enter you. Now both of you lie back, your legs forming an X. Slow, leisurely gyrations replace thrusting.
"If you’re really into yoga, this a great position," says Jenni Skyler, PhD , of The Intimacy Institute and resident sexologist for Adam and Eve. This seemingly weird sex position lets your partner penetrate even deeper (which can be great if your S.O. has a smaller penis or is using a strap on). Too make it a little comfier, put a pillow beneath your shoulders.
Do it : Lie on your back with your legs raised and folded over so that your ankles are on either side of your head, while your partner squats and penetrates you.
Despite what the name suggests, there's no food involved in this freaky sex position (although, if you're into that, why not up the crazy factor?). Otherwise, this position allows for deep, powerful thrusts, but at a sideways angle that feels totally different and hot. "It's a really intimate position," explains Skyler. "You have a lot of eye contact and you're literally interwoven." It's great for couples who are looking for more depth of connection in addition to the physical stuff.
Do it: As your partner is kneeling over you, wrap one leg around their waist while the other leg rests under their butt.
Since you’re both controlling the movements, you can rock back and forth to get into a satisfying rhythm that works for the both of you. Truth be told, getting into this position might require some flexibility considering all that leg-over-leg action and hip spreading, Skyler says, but once you're there you can both lean back and let your pelvises put in work.
Do it: Sure, it resembles the crab walk, but in a crazy-sexy way. Your pelvis should be above his while your legs bend to the side of his body.
"This is a great position that's both sexy and relaxing," Skyler says. Your partner gets to take the reins with this one, and they'll be rewarded with an awesome view of your body—especially your face. (Wild, yet intimate—does it really get better than that?) Plus, your hands are free to explore your other erogenous zones .
Do it: If you like the Spoon sex position, you'll love the Spork. Instead of lying on your sides, you’ll stay flat on your back while your partner positions their body at a 90-degree angle in between your legs.
Don't let the innocent name fool you—this sex position will definitely make you feel totally naughty. Skyler recommends it for a partner with a particularly flexible penis or if you're planning on incorporating some other toys (think: the partner on top reaching down with a dildo in hand). Plus, from this lying position, you have easy access to fondle your partner's erogenous zones . Not to mention, your partner's pelvis is perfectly positioned to grind against your clit. Maybe try adding a little sexy butt massage to the mix, too.
Do it : This is basically missionary position with an upside-down twist. Lie on your back and have your partner straddle you facing away. Lift your legs and wrap them around their back to elevate your pelvis so they can enter you. Grab your partner's butt to help them slide up and back.
Warning: This sex position is not for beginners! Think of this as downward dog with even better benefits—the deep-thrusting, G-spot hitting kind. Skyler warns that it does require some yogi talent and shoulder strength to maintain this athletic position. But even if you're only able to stay in this position for a little bit, it’ll definitely be an experience you’ll remember. If the pressure on your arms gets to be too much, take some of the pressure off by resting your upper body on the edge of the bed or a table.
Do it: Get into the downward dog yoga position, then have your partner sit at the end of a bed, and grab your legs so you can wrap them around their waist.
Due to the nature of this position, you'll feel more of your partner's body in motion. Plus, you can always reach down to offer a little butt or leg massage while your S.O. thrusts. Pro tip: This is another great position if you have a partner with a flexible penis or you're using a dildo for the night. It also gives the woman the chance to feel new sensations on different parts of her vaginal wall, Skylar says.
Do it: So you're probably thinking, "wait...how?" But here's how this one's done: Have your partner enter you from missionary position, then slide their legs and chest off your body so their limbs form an "X" with yours.
If you want a good view of each other's bodies, consider adding this one to tonight's activity list. "This is definitely
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