Dick Energy

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Big dick energy: what is it, who has it and should we really care?
It is a phrase that is ‘a thing’, according to the collective wisdom of the internet – but do you have BDE?
Celebrities deemed to possess ‘big dick energy’: (L-R) Cate Blanchett, Rihanna, Pete Davidson, Cardi B and Idris Elba. Composite: REX/Epa/Getty
Last modified on Wed 27 Jun 2018 07.47 BST
Big dick energy – you know it when you see it. Not physically – well, not necessarily. It’s an attitude. A swagger. A vibe.
You don’t even need a penis to have BDE. Rihanna, for example? Really strong BDE. David Beckham, not so much.
But those who took a 20-minute break from social media and returned to find their timeline full of big dick energy chat are asking each other: what is it?
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And then, sotto voce: do I have it?
While it sounds like it has been round forever, the phrase first appeared on Twitter this week in relation to Ariana Grande.
Grande tweeted, then deleted, about the generous endowment of her fiance Pete Davidson. The internet was delighted. Davidson, a comedian and star of Saturday Night Live who is very charismatic but perhaps not conventionally attractive, “exudes big dick energy”, according to Twitter user @babyvietcong, who had borrowed the phrase from a tweet by @imbobswaget.
Pete davidson is 6’3 with dark circles, exudes big dick energy, looks evil but apparently is an angel, and loves his girl publicly the only thing wrong w him is that he’s a scorpio but anyway.....id married him within a month too
The internet nodded collectively: yeah, that makes sense. Big dick energy. It’s a thing.
BDE has always been with us, even if we haven’t the phrase to describe it: it’s charisma and confidence, coupled with the ability to almost instantly make other people feel good. In some ways, it’s the opposite of toxic masculinity.
“Big dick energy does not care for your pathetic gender binary and will not pander to it,” wrote Vice. “Chris Hemsworth wielding a ludicrously big hammer with arms the size of cows and yelling a lot? Feeble big dick energy. Cate Blanchett simply standing there smirking, but, like, only using her eyes somehow? Powerful, powerful big dick energy.”
According to the Verge: “Rihanna? Big dick energy. Cardi B? Big dick energy. Cate Blanchett? Big dick energy.” It’s apparently unanimous re: Cate.
The Cut described it as “a certain gait – sort of like you’ve got a massive dick swinging around – but also a twinkle in the eye, like if you look right at that twinkle you can see a dick swinging in the eye.” Justins Bieber and Theroux have got it, they thought; Idris Elba for sure; Timberlake, not so much.
As for the Trump administration? The president himself has small dick energy, same as Jared and Ivanka. But Scaramucci has BDE, as does Kellyanne Conway and Steve Bannon.
*extremely cool youth pastor voice*
you know who had real big dick energy?
You could play this game all day. Who has the big dick energy, and who doesn’t? Play it on your bosses. Play it on your city. New York, for instance, could break your cervix every time you fly into JFK. Sydney used to have it until the lockout laws.
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Play it on colleagues, or on your favourite writer, or on forms of public transport.
Play it with yourself: do you have big dick energy? And if not, why not?
BDE should be celebrated (it is rare that the internet arrives at something actually fun), but it’s also a little limiting. For years most women didn’t have to worry about our dick size, a small compensation for the other crap we put up with. But now we have another ideal to live up to.
It will be a great day when the female equivalent is a thing: let’s call it Powerful Vagina Energy. When women are celebrated for their feminine power, and when all those beta men out there get recognised for their awesome PVE.
Until then, we’ll have to go with what we were given (if we are lucky): BDE.
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What is 'big dick energy' and how do you know if you have it?
Having a penis is not a prerequisite for having BDE
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[This article was first published in 2018]
Big dick energy: while you may only have learned the name recently, you’ll almost certainly be familiar with the concept.
You know it when you see it. You may even have it yourself.
It’s the social media topic du jour, but what exactly is big dick energy? And how do you know if you’ve got it?
Here’s everything you need to know.
Where did all the fuss around big dick energy - or BDE - come from?
It all kicked off when Ariana Grande reportedly tweeted (and hastily deleted) about how generously endowed her [now ex-]fiancé Pete Davidson is.
Despite Grande’s deletion of the tweet, the damage had been done and Twitter was abuzz with talk about the size of Davidson’s manhood.
One tweet in particular struck a nerve: “Pete Davidson is 6’3 with dark circles, exudes big dick energy, looks evil but apparently is an angel, and loves his girl publicly,” wrote a woman named Tina.
And the public was in agreement. In fact, we were all wondering how no one had coined a name for BDE before.
Naturally, there is already an Urban Dictionary definition of BDE, and that’s how you know it’s a Thing.
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Big dick energy is described as “confidence without cockiness. It is never misplaced and it cannot be simulated. It is the sexual equivalent of writing a check for $10k knowing you got it in the bank account [sic].”
Men with BDE include Idris Elba, Chris Evans, the late Anthony Bourdain, Tom Hardy, Robert Downey Jr, The Rock and Harry Styles.
But don’t be fooled into thinking you actually need to have a large penis to have BDE - you don’t need to have one at all.
Yes, it’s just as feasible for a woman to carry herself with big dick energy as a man. Rihanna? Brimming with BDE. Serena Williams? Lashings of the stuff. Cate Blanchett? Perhaps the biggest BDE of them all.
Of course, some have pointed out the fact that the name revolving around male genitalia may do nothing for the feminist cause or for male self-esteem, as it reinforces the connotations associated with having a sizeable penis.
BDE is something you either have, or you don’t. It’s a quiet assurance that in some starts from birth and in others develops over time. But the crucial factor is it’s low-key.
Someone with big dick energy is someone with a relaxed confidence in themselves. They’re not shy or quiet, but they’re not arrogant either. And they’re certainly not overcompensating for anything.
If you have BDE, you might walk with a bit of an attitude - but it’s not try-hard. You don’t put on a cocky swagger in the hope of making a point or drawing attention to yourself, you just stride with confidence.
It’s about radiating energy that draws people towards you and gives off the impression you have your life together. If you have BDE, you’re probably well liked and easy to get on with. People like spending time with you. You make people feel good.
Is little dick energy also a Thing?
Whilst some have suggested that toxic masculinity is the opposite of BDE, others have proffered simply the concept of little dick energy (LDE) or even mediocre dick energy (MDE).
These people? They’re arrogant, bolshy, petty, in-your-face and annoying. 
Steer clear of those afflicted with LDE and get you a partner, boss and best mate with BDE.
Join thought-provoking conversations, follow other Independent readers and see their replies
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