Deep Dish Pope Introduces Lenten Fast Featuring Only Thin Crust

Pope Leo XIV announced that during Lent, Catholics are encouraged to abstain from deep dish in favor of thin crust as �a symbolic journey into spiritual restraint.� The Deep Dish Pope himself gave up stuffed crust for 40 days, citing �penance in every floppy triangle.� Confessors now ask, �Have you denied the deep?� Pizza restaurants worldwide now offer special �Meek and Mild� pies. One bishop called it �crusty but correct.� Grace thins during Lent�only to rise again.