Daughter First Bra

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© Copyright 2021 St. Joseph Communications.
Is it time for some…support? We have advice for parents wondering how to handle the first bra talk.
Diana Carmichael* of Peterborough, Ont. has three daughters, and they’ve all responded differently to the ‘first bra’ milestone. “My oldest was pretty low-key about it, and asked for a bra when she needed one. My 11-year-old should be wearing one now, but doesn’t want to, and my nine-year-old keeps stealing and wearing her sisters’ bras, even though she doesn’t need them yet,” says Carmichael.
Arati Mokashi, a paediatric endocrinologist in Halifax, says that breasts may start budding as early as eight or as late as 13, but age 10 and a half is the average. “American data suggests that puberty is beginning earlier now than in the past, which may be due to improvements in nutrition and an increase in obesity,” explains Mokashi. “We can assume this data would be similar for Canadian girls.” Girls with breast buds may ask for a bra for comfort or modesty, or parents may be first to make the suggestion.
Bobcaygeon, Ont. mom Gina Reilly* started noticing her 11-year-old daughter’s body changing last summer. “I suggested we pick up a bra as part of our back-to-school shopping—I thought it was best to start the year with it.” Reilly says she wasn’t fazed by the changes. “It certainly made me think about how fast she’s growing up, but I try to appreciate every age my kids have reached—the baby stage, heading off to school and now puberty. It’s all new and exciting for me as a parent.” Carmichael felt a bit sentimental when bra shopping with her eldest, but with her younger daughters, she’s been much more matter-of-fact.
When you start bra shopping, you may be surprised by some of the padded and push-up options on the market for young girls. Many parents prefer to start with a sports-bra style. After Wyoming teenager Megan Grassell found the bra choices for her 13-year-old little sister to be too sexual, she started Yellowberry, an online bra company offering age-appropriate underwear for girls 11 to 15. Her Kickstarter fundraising campaign went viral, and Grassell, now 18, is shipping her designs internationally.
What if, like Carmichael, your daughter wants to go bra shopping before she really needs one? Carla Fry, a psychologist in Vancouver, recommends listening to what your child is telling you. “Simple formula: If she’s asking for a bra, it’s time to get her one, whether it’s for modesty, fitting in or fashion.” (Fry isn’t saying parents should always give in for the sake of social acceptance. If fitting in seems to be a frequent preoccupation for your child, hand a conversation about peer pressure.) 

Some girls might prefer to celebrate the milestone with a fun, parent-tween shopping day, while others will appreciate a private, online purchase with little fanfare. Follow your daughter’s lead, advises Fry, and if you’re in doubt, just ask her. Reilly chose not to make bra shopping into a production, as her daughter initially seemed a bit embarrassed when talking about her body (and she still prefers the term “undershirt” to “bra”).
Keeping the lines of communication open is important. A girl’s first period will likely begin two to two-and-a-half years after breasts begin to develop, says Mokashi, so plan to have casual but honest conversations in the coming years.
“Now we’re talking more often, and she’s more comfortable as we go through other changes,” says Reilly.
Girls now need bras about a year earlier than they did 20 years ago. A study published in the journal Pediatrics back in 2010 found that by the age of seven, 10 percent of white girls, two percent of Asian girls, 15 percent of Hispanic girls, and 23 percent of black girls had started developing breasts.
This one thing could keep your tween girl in sports
How to help your daughter when puberty starts early
How to talk to your kids about periods
I saw a guy checking out my 12-year-old in her bikini, and I’m not sure I handled it right
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The First Bra Guide: How and When to Buy Your Daughter a Bra
The First Bra Guide: How and When to Buy Your Daughter a Bra
Buying a girl’s first bra isn’t always smooth sailing. While some teens and tweens are over the moon to be hit by womanhood and start wearing bras, others may not be so keen. As puberty hits, so do a plethora of insecurities. To help you be a supportive parent during this milestone in your daughter’s life, here’s when you should get your daughter her first bra and how to choose one.
The average first bra age is 11 years old. However, girls start wearing their first bra as young as eight. Regardless of age, there are several obvious signs your daughter may want her first bra:
If your daughter isn’t as forthcoming to openly ask about bra shopping, you may need to broach the topic yourself. She’s most likely ready to go shopping if she’s started developing breast buds, this is essentially the first signs of breast tissue under the nipples.
Girls develop at any age from 8-14, so there is no specific time you should buy a first bra, just when she is physically and emotionally ready.
If in doubt, it’s best to simply ask your daughter if she’s ready for one and respect her wishes either way. Huffington Post advises that you ensure you show sensitivity to her needs and help her be as confident as possible – it’s a big milestone in her life! 
If your daughter would like her first bra, a training bra is a good place to start. A training bra is bra designed for teens and tweens who may not fit in standard adult bras yet. These are lightweight starter bras and help provide a bit of coverage for breast buds, nipples and growing breasts. Training bras are a good stepping stone into wearing adult bras. 
Going around the shops looking for a training bra might be a bit overwhelming for your daughter. If this is the case, it might be a good idea buying the first bra at home. She can measure herself at home with a tape measure and look for bras online to avoid a shop bra fitting.
As a first bra, it’s best to go for substance over style. You’ll want something comfortable that your daughter can wear throughout the day, but also while doing sports. Lacy or push up bras are probably unnecessary for a few years. The best first bras are:
Most importantly, you need to ensure the bra fits comfortably. According to Kids Health, if the size is a little too small or big, it won’t affect the growth of the breast tissue, however, it will lead to discomfort throughout the day. To ensure your daughter’s bra fits properly, do the following:
Read our fitting room guide to know what to look out for when choosing a bra size.
Happy first bra shopping! Browse our range of bras to find the perfect one for your daughter.
2nd June 2021 :: General & Underwear
14th May 2021 :: General & Underwear
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