Daddy Little Bdsm
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Daddy Little Bdsm
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message 1:
by
Della
(new)
This is the most horrifying thing I have ever seen. Please tell me this isn't real.
message 2:
by
Kriss
(last edited Jul 19, 2015 08:05AM)
(new)
Normandie, I finally picked all your DD/lg books up. So this is gonna be outing me somewhat. I finally discovered my little. Oh she's been there all along but I didnt know what was going on. My Daddy happens to also be my sadist as our bdsm relationship is going on a decade strong. I do disagree on the generalization of a non sadist Dom becoming and falling into the role of a Daddy, because they also have a chance to become a gentle dominant. DADDYS are a special breed. They recognize littlea and are drawn to nurture them and accept everything about them, including the need to hide under the desk and color at times lol. They also have to always be there no matter what. Even at 3am when the little needs ice cream or a pillow fort. Likw I said, we have been in a bfsm relationship for 10 years. He's seen me be destroyed by a rape and has nursed me back from health, mental and physical ..and still is. To the pwrson commenting below, This isnt age play guys, this is an incredibly open and important dynamic for many who need the simplicity of being little. (I'm more a middle but thats for a different time.) Normandy we know each other on Facebook and I've been away for a few months... this is one reason, the stress of being a publicist finally caused a break. My now Daddy came hime to me in the corner with my stuffy and wondering if i needed to be commited because all o wanted to do was suck my thumb and rock. My therapist is the one, who knew our d/s dynamic already, who handed a website to both of us and we both clicked...but Daddy still also gives my masochist scenes of pain. I think the important part is a Daddy has to always be on. He cannot take a break. A little never knows when her Lil is gonna come out and need her Daddy (or mommy). But he also is very sexual and naughty. He also now realizes why im so shy at times when others i can be on diaplay suspended in shibari dor rhe whole room. Anyway, this became longer tham I was meaning it too. Your books are great and I especially like the Little Haven series. It has more explination and info within the prose for exploring littles in the lifestyle. Gods I just rambled... I guess the comment before made me want to shout ..I'm a little and I have a Daddy..its not wrong, it's more than right. I also can hold an in depth conversation on the chivalric nature of to2days pop culture romances and the heavy influence of storiea auch as the green knight with space operas... In other words, this is my kink and it's not age play and I'm not simple minded. It's saved my life in many ways and your books are a fav of many of my fellow littles. Keep writing and thanks from the bottom of my glitter ladden heart.
message 3:
by
Normandie
(new)
Thank you so much Kriss for your comment. It sounds like you are doing better and I'm happy to hear from you! I really appreciate that you have enjoyed my books. There is definitely a difference between age play and DD/lg, but I don't know that it's a big deal in RL relationships as long as the couple has figured out what works for them. As an author I try to clarify the difference because I want people to understand what they are going to be reading (and not reading) in my books. Personally, age regression isn't my thing so it's harder to write that. I tried to do more of that in my Little Haven book, because it was about a community of age players, but my next book (September) will go back to my Daddy's Girl series, which is more in my wheelhouse. I know you have been through a lot, and I'm glad you have a sweet Daddy who has helped you through it! It's a wonderful thing when we realize what we need and the one we love can provide that for us. Hugs to you and your glittery heart!!!
message 4:
by
Annette
(new)
Della wrote: "This is the most horrifying thing I have ever seen. Please tell me this isn't real." Dear Della... As a little girl, I wish to tell you, that ,yes, it very much is. But I am sorry you don't understand. My Daddy adores me, and i, him. He would NEVER hurt me, even if I mess up. Instead his punishments areally meant to teach me to be better, not for pain. I take care of his every need, and he, mine. I'm saddened that you find it offensive, but many do not understand. The level of commitment we have for each other is beyond any marriage...
message 5:
by
Jimmie
(last edited Apr 10, 2016 04:05AM)
(new)
I have just evolved into being a daddy dom. I knew I was a dom always but I was not into the whole sadistic type of Dom and submissive. Hell even slave and master. I have just met the baby girl of my dreams. She is really awesome. I have told her that this is a new experience for me, but I seem to have fit naturally into the Daddy role. Della yes it is a real thing. No need to be horrified about it. It is what it is. Just because you do not understand the dynamics of these relationships does not give you the right to be condescending to those of us in this lifestyle. That is what it is....a lifestyle. Everyone is consenting adults and there are no laws broken at all.
message 6:
by
Apple
(new)
I recently met a guy who is into this Daddy/little girl kinks. I am new to this, I am a bit scared as he initially wanted a master/slave style. I said to him that no way I can be a slave and said to stop it. He backed off a bit and asked me whether I can play daddy/little girl thing. I said I could as I read online it seems a rewarding and doable lifestyle. However, ever since day one we met, the conversation is always about sex, but nothing else. This does not seem to be what i expected and i also explicitly express my desire of having a proper date and get to know each other rather than just directly sex. Is daddy like this? Should I nod to his sexual request before he can care for me needs? Is he genuine? I am really not sure what to do as I seem to like him and the 2 sex occasions that we had I seemed naturally fit into the little girl's role well in the bedroom. Is he playing the mind game? or is he just a normal daddy that requesting his little girl to commit first? Look forward to hearing from you.
message 7:
by
Nicole
(new)
Tawna wrote: "Is there a place to go to talk to other littles? I've always known there was something missing in my life. I knew I wanted a daddy but was confused about it all and them my Dom daddy found me! It c..." Fetlife, there are lots of groups for littles.
message 8:
by
Nicole
(last edited Jul 06, 2016 03:49PM)
(new)
Apple wrote: "I recently met a guy who is into this Daddy/little girl kinks. I am new to this, I am a bit scared as he initially wanted a master/slave style. I said to him that no way I can be a slave and said t..." He's probably just really excited to have found someone willing to explore and is being a little over eager and forward. If you tell him clearly how you feel and what you need then if he is someone worth exploring with he will respond and adjust his approach in order to respect your comfort level. Communication in any relationship especially one involving BDSM is critical and both parties have a responsibility to express their thoughts and feelings. I try not to assume the worst about a persons intentions. By that I mean he probably doesn't realize you feel this way. However, always use caution and look out for red flag behavior such as him ignoring your stated limited and pushing you beyond what you've consented to.
message 9:
by
Tajuana
(new)
Looking for a new Daddy email me at tajuanatyler87@gmail.com
message 10:
by
Rachel
(last edited Feb 21, 2018 07:48AM)
(new)
Apple wrote: "I recently met a guy who is into this Daddy/little girl kinks. I am new to this, I am a bit scared as he initially wanted a master/slave style. I said to him that no way I can be a slave and said t..." Yes, I agree, communicate what makes you feel comfortable and voice your needs. His need for sex may be overwhelming especially early on, it’s important to remember, at any stage of the relationship that your needs are just as important. No one can express your needs but you. If they really care about you and want to protect you, they will not make you feel bad about what you want, need or who you are. They will cherish you and try their very best to respect you, that’s exactly what you deserve! Sex will always be there, daddy’s can wait for it until you feel comfortable to move forward, you are important! Try not to submit all of who you are in the relationship, hold onto your identity. If he reacts badly, becomes aggressive or pushy, when you say “no” he needs to know that’s NOT OK. The relationship should be a mutual give-and-take, a sacred haven of love and understanding, a bond of mutual respect, where you both thrive naturally. Where you both meet one another’s needs, care for one another and put each other above yourselves. This is what its like with me and my daddy. It’s what I’ve waited a long time for, and I’ve gone through several daddy’s that were not a good fit. I finally stopped trying to “find” one, then naturally, I found someone who was a daddy dom, and didn’t even know it. When I opened up, we both could see it was a natural fit but like your guy he was very sexual in the beginning and I had to create space, communicate, slow things down until he could respect my need to take things slow. People only treat you the way you let them. So listen to your inner voice and remember self-care comes first. I’m so happy I found my daddy and he loves me with all his heart. But I know that would’ve never happened if I didn’t love myself first.
message 11:
by
Jenn
(new)
I just met my first Daddy and I am so excited. I thought I knew what dom/sub was, but I had no clue about the lifestyle. I met him online, and he invited me over to his house after a conversation where we got a little into detail, and he expressed his wishes to me that required my presence. So I went. When I arrived, we did get to that, and discussion of what a Daddy Dom D/s lifestyle was all about, how there would be a training period, and after that, if we both wanted to move forward, he would 'collar' me. He put a collar on me that night! So don't get me wrong, but we did not have sex... At first this perturbed me, but I have learned not to have expectations of anyone and also I was having such an amazing time with my new Daddy and all of the information he was providing me that I quickly came around to his line of thinking. He really does know best for me. But I am not going to see him for a few days and this disturbs me greatly. I'm scared he is going to disappear out of my life forever like the rest of these online matches. I am trying to learn all that I can about this life that just a few weeks before I met him I came to realizations about. Then he arrived, and I had such physical reactions to his explanations of the training period, and our short training sessions, as they were, I felt like I was going to die. Now I feel like I am going to die again.
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Part of HuffPost Women. ©2022 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved.
While many fathers of grown women still see themselves as their daughters' protectors -- which, again, is perfectly fine and understandable -- it's also necessary for a father to instill in his daughter the belief that she can be her own protector, too.
Author, research psychologist and gender scholar
Jun 22, 2012, 01:27 PM EDT | Updated Aug 22, 2012
This post was published on the now-closed HuffPost Contributor platform. Contributors control their own work and posted freely to our site. If you need to flag this entry as abusive, send us an email.
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Part of HuffPost Women. ©2022 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved.
Author, research psychologist and gender scholar
At 33, Dianne had been married to Daniel for just under a year. She was smart, pretty, cheerful, and enjoyed the finer things: The slouchy designer handbag slung over her shoulder must have cost upwards of a thousand dollars. She was used to being taken care of: Back home in Missouri, she'd grown up the youngest of six children, and the only daughter. "I feel like I had a princess childhood," Dianne told me. "Like I lived my whole childhood in a pink tutu and everything was perfect." She had me at "tutu."
Dianne went on to recall her relationship with her parents as "ideal." She described her mom as a terrific cook and her father as an exceedingly hard worker. She said her relationship with him was -- then and still -- "incredibly close and special." I asked Dianne if she had looked for a husband who shared her father's qualities. She nodded. Both had great senses of humor, were intensely career driven, and fully in charge. "My dad always wore the pants in the family relationship, and my husband does, too," she said.
Turns out, there were other similarities. Dianne's father had been an alcoholic; whenever he was in a bad mood, she'd be the one to make him laugh. When she succeeded, she felt even more special, empowered. As a child, this role had given her a sense of purpose and security. Her husband, though not necessarily an alcoholic, would sometimes stay out all night, she told me. "I told him it's all going to change once I start having babies, though," she said lightly. I worried about how Dianne might handle it if -- and likely when -- things didn't change. Similar to having learned to cater to her father, and be catered to by him, Dianne avoided fighting with her husband. "Sometimes I'll even say, 'Fine, you're right,' even if I believe differently, just because I don't like confrontation," she told me, adding that her husband controlled all of the family's finances. "But he's very loyal and dedicated. I never question what he's doing. I know he wants the best for me."
There's nothing wrong with trusting your husband's judgment and believing he holds your interests close to his heart. But Dianne had lost the ability to see what "the best" really meant -- for her. She'd lost sight of her own intelligence and basic common sense. Like many women who are pampered or treated as extra special in childhood, Dianne's sense of her own power had peaked back when she was a girl; back when a few words and a smile were all that were needed to transform her father's mood from melancholy to joy. Along the way, her self-worth had become deeply rooted in others' happiness. She never developed the ability or assuredness to express her authentic self, especially when that self wasn't pleased.
There is a myth that the pampered child holds a lucky lot in life. In reality, that life reads more like a grim fairy tale. Adorable and adored, her joy and laughter enthrall her parents, who revel in their ability to so easily please this tiny being. As one father joked to me, "Being a dad is so fulfilling. Where else will I find people who will literally jump up and down with joy at seeing me?" In turn, making his children happy makes his day.
But as a daughter changes and grows, so too should the pleasure a parent -- especially a father -- feels in her happiness. Instead, many daughters are spoiled by their fathers, who rush in with car keys, money, and indulgent yeses. On an emotional level, she basks in the knowledge of her power to please her father, and learns to respond more to his pleasure than to her own. She feels taken care of, but it's a false -- and conditional -- sense of security. In this way, a child's real feelings may be derailed by her parents' influence. She becomes unable to determine where her parents' feelings end and her own begins, unable to speak up for herself. That stays with her. Consider Dianne: Why would a bright, educated, articulate woman be so willing to relinquish her opinions, her paychecks, and her power to her husband? It's because she learned early on the pleasure of pleasing her father, an ongoing dynamic that engaged her emotions with his and led her to seek out the same in a spouse. From an early age, Dianne's mission in life was to bring joy to her beloved, beleaguered father. Now, that mission had transferred to her husband. She's still playing the role of the obedient and complaisant child, and tacitly enforcing the notion that there's only one adult in the marriage. And it's not her.
The Daddy's pampered little girl dynamic can also pose a threat to a girl's sexual development. Take Julie, a 32-year-old single woman whose father taught her to always "be nice and make people feel comfortable." Now, whenever Julie dates a guy, she lets him treat her like a doormat, rather than offend him or risk confrontation. Or Lisa. When Lisa was 12, her father drew up a "contract" stating that Lisa would not date until she was 21. In exchange, he would get her a puppy. "At the time, I just wanted the dog, and I didn't care about boys," Lisa told me. "But later, when I obviously 'violated' the contract, I felt awkward and guilty and confused."
That's not to say that fathers should not dote on their daught
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