Cunningulas

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Cunningulas
10 Cunnilingus Myths Everyone Needs To Stop Believing
For the sake of clitorises everywhere.
1. Myth: If you don't orgasm from oral, you have a defective vagina.
2. Myth: You need to chug pineapple juice so you taste/smell better down there.
3. Myth: Whoever is face-to-vagina with you is thinking, "Damn, what is UP with her labia, I liked the ones on the last woman I was with so much more."
4. Myth: You're going to hurt your partner's feelings if you tell them what you want.
5. Myth: You should be so loud during oral that running into your neighbors becomes really awkward.
6. Myth: You should be all about that direct clitoral stimulation.
7. Myth: The only thing that matters is their tongue.
8. Myth: You don't need to worry about STIs.
9. Myth: You're not a feminist if you can't get on board with cunnilingus.
10. Myth: Receiving oral sex is the most intimate thing you can do. No, wait, it's actually NBD.
Zahra Barnes joined SELF in November 2015, working on the Culture and Health teams before eventually becoming Executive Editor. She has spent her career as a reporter and editor covering people's lives with a focus on wellness.
Zahra specializes in sexual, reproductive, and mental health, all with the goal of destigmatizing... Read more
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Although I think its official name could use some work, cunnilingus is a gift. People with vaginas obviously deserve to experience just as much sexual pleasure as people with penises do, and receiving oral sex can help make that happen. But destructive sexual myths abound, and they can affect many people's sex lives. That's especially true for something as vagina-centric as oral sex. Instead of being able to enjoy it in all its glory—or not, because some people legitimately aren't into it—we often worry about things like whether we should smell "better" while ignoring that, yes, you can get a sexually transmitted infection from cunnilingus. (Sorry, buzzkill, I know.) Here, the truth about 10 oral-sex myths you never have to believe again.
Sex is supposed to help you escape from the pressures of everyday life, not add to them. Sure, some women who can't orgasm from intercourse find that oral sex is their vaginas' golden ticket. But even if you think oral is enjoyable, it might not work for you orgasm-wise, and that's fine.
That's not to say you should be satisfied with not getting off if orgasms are indeed your goal, but that you shouldn't feel like something's wrong with you if cunnilingus doesn't immediately do the trick. It can take some time to workshop what exactly gets you there, and that should actually be fun .
First of all, there's nothing that can make your vagina taste like a piece of fruit. Except, well, putting a piece of fruit in it, which is dangerous , so don't do that. Second, you don't need to alter how you smell or taste. Unless you have some sort of infection, whatever's going on down there is completely normal.
Unless you're hooking up with a jackass, whoever you're with is probably enjoying themselves too much to think anything remotely critical about how your parts look. (And in case you were wondering, your labia are probably normal .) Unfortunately, assholes do walk among us. If someone says something rude about the way your vagina looks, they don't really deserve to experience its greatness.
Constructive criticism is great! Sure, it might be a little embarrassing for them when you correct their technique. But they should promptly get over that upon realizing how hot it is that you know what you want and are able to describe it.
Thank you, pornography, for spreading this falsehood. Cool if during good oral, you moan, scream, or get particularly inventive with your dirty talk at top volume. Also cool if you're pretty silent as it happens because you're concentrating on how good it feels, you're just not very vocal during that kind of sex, or because every time you get really loud the person you're with changes what they're doing and chases away your orgasm.
True, a lot of people need intense pressure on their clitorises to orgasm. But the clitoris has around 8,000 nerve endings , meaning that for some people, anything more than a feathery-light touch feels like someone's trying to break their vagina. There's no "one stimulation fits all" rule with oral, so don't feel weird if you need someone to either barely touch your clitoris or go at it with the suctioning power of a Hoover.
Humans have been blessed with entire faces and hands, not to mention the brains to figure out how to use them during oral. Plus, vibrators and dildos exist! If you're frankly a little bored with tongue-only action, ask the person you're with to change things up.
Oral still counts as sex, and dental dams count as protection (even though people make fun of them. Why?). Sexually transmitted infections can be passed along during all kinds of oral, so give yourself the peace of mind that comes with practicing safe sex.
Maybe you're (rightfully) obsessed with your vagina and don't think it's anything to be ashamed of, but you still don't like how oral feels. It might feel too ticklish, or you might not be able to shake the thought that someone's rubbing spit all over your most intimate parts. Much like you don't need to adore giving blow jobs to be sexy, you don't need to love receiving oral to be hot/feminist/anything at all.
Really, however you view oral sex is right. Maybe you always check it off the list before moving along to another sexual activity that's more intimate in your mind, whether that's intercourse or something else. Or maybe you don't do it until after you've already done everything else, are falling in love, and are finally ready to have someone get up close and personal with you. As with all other types of sex, as long as what you're doing makes both of you feel comfortable, it's the right choice.
You may also like: We Tested The Strength Of Our Vaginas, And This Is What Happened
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6 Women Reveal Men's Biggest Oral Sex Mistakes

Self deprecation is the most lethal weapon in any ladykiller's arsenal.
Bonus: You'll also be a much, much healthier man.
Avoid turning your night of amour into a lingering nightmare.
Self deprecation is the most lethal weapon in any ladykiller's arsenal.
Bonus: You'll also be a much, much healthier man.
Avoid turning your night of amour into a lingering nightmare.
"Half-heartedly lapping for like 45 seconds then demanding praise...super lame."
If you like going down on your female partner, you're in luck—and more importantly, so is she—because a lack of enthusiasm for cunnilingus is the hardest obstacle to overcome if you ever want to perform it convincingly and satisfactorily. And we should all want to be good at it because, done right, it's more likely to end in a toe-curling orgasm for her than vaginal intercourse. According to one meta study, only 25% of women are consistently orgasmic during sex .
The thing is, a lot of women complain that would-be cunning linguists are making a lot of common mistakes. We know this because we asked them and compiled some of their most common responses below. So read on to make sure that you're no neophyte in the high art of pleasing her in the most intimate of ways. And for more hot tips, learn the 5 ways to ensure you'll have the best sex of your life tonight .
"One time I had a guy go down on me and actually used the line, 'My ex said I gave the best head.' " – A, Vancouver, BC. ae0fcc31ae342fd3a1346ebb1f342fcb
You had a past lover who raved about the way you went down on her. Your ability to make her feel good made you feel good and that's great. But it doesn't change the fact that each new partner comes complete with her very own set of likes, and dislikes. So while thinking back on rave reviews is manna for your ego, giving your partner boilerplate oral isn't in either of your best interests. Instead, soak up verbal and nonverbal cues from her like a sponge. While it's advantageous to have a cache of tried and tested techniques at your disposal, the only way to get her where she wants to go is to attune yourself to what works for her. And if you need a little extra boost, learn the 30 ways that exercise supercharges your sex life .
"Half-heartedly lapping for like 45 seconds then demanding praise…super lame." – J, Brooklyn, NY.
Dr. Ian Kerner , author of She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman encourages you to think of cunnilingus not as foreplay but as coreplay, the centerpiece of a complete act of outercourse that culminates in her orgasm. "Many men approach cunnilingus as an optional appetizer," he says. "However, this approach does not give a woman ample time to become aroused and ready for direct clitoral contact, nor do a few licks here and there provide the persistent, consistent clitoral stimulation that intensifies arousal." Keep this up and, before you know it, you'll be a freaking god in the bedroom .
"We know when you're faking it. If you hate going down on a girl then just say it. We can't guarantee it won't be a dealbreaker (because, come on now) but nothing's worse than a guy who gives you a cursory lick with a facial expression akin to a child who hates broccoli and then darts away thinking he's done 'woke guy' duty. Uh, no dude. We can tell time." – E, Seattle, WA.
Back to the Body is a world-traveling women's retreat run by sex educator and author Pamela Madsen. She explains that a lot of women harbour feelings of shame about their vulva and worry about how they look and smell. "The best orgasms happen when women know that their partner loves their pussy," she explains adding that partners would do well to verbalize their excitement and arousal when up close and personal with a woman's vulva. This is a sentiment echoed by Dr. Kerner. "Cunnilingus is an extremely vulnerable act and many women feel a lack of genital self-esteem," he says. "Be sure to reassure her that her smell and taste turn you on, and that you're enjoying being there and that there's no rush; she has all the time in the world."
To Kerner's last point: it's important not to be too goal-oriented. You run the risk of screwing hings up completely. And anyway, you should be enthusiastic. Going down on her is one of the surefire ways to make sex last (much) longer .
"Not checking in to make sure he has the pressure right. Cunnilingus is like a massage…it's important to get the right pressure so that it's satisfying but not overwhelming." – B, London, UK.
Of course, everyone is different but many of the women I polled mentioned that too much direct pressure on the clitoris can be too intense to be enjoyable. "The head of the clitoris is homologous to the head of the penis, meaning they come from the same embryonic tissue, "explains clinical sexologist and creator of online video series, " Sexplanations ," Dr. Lindsey Doe. "The same way you probably don't want me sucking, flicking, and rubbing the head of your dick is the same for my clit. Run your tongue along the length of the clitoral shaft. Use the clitoral hood or prepuce to massage it without direct stimulation. And for goodness sake, pay attention to by body cues because I might want less, more, or something different altogether." "We each have our own pressure preference," adds sexologist Amy Levine . "The clitoris is nerve packed—more nerve endings than the entire penis—and while some women may love a firm touch, for other's it's too sensitive. Take note of her verbal and nonverbal cues."
"Fingering straight, instead of curling the fingers upwards towards the front of the pelvis to hit the g spot feels like a tiny penis. It doesn't do much." – B, London. UK.
Not all women like their cunnilingus accompanied by fingering but many of the women I spoke with said that having their g-spots rubbed in conjunction with a mouth on and around their vulva made for a more powerful and reliable orgasm, particularly when doing the "come hither" motion and rubbing the spongy area one to three inches up on the front wall of their vagina. "Don't think of your fingers as a proxy for your penis; it's not about the thrusting; it's more about the penetration and pressure," says Dr. Kerner. "The vagina naturally tents and contracts, so insert one or two fingers into the vagina; press upwards against the g-spot, let her vaginal muscles nestle and clench against your fingers."
"When you say, 'Mmm, that's so good, I love that', and they immediately switch it up. If something feels amazing, please oh please keep doing it just like that." – L, Brooklyn, NY.
While her thighs my be on your ears from time to time, listening to the verbal and nonverbal cues she's giving you is going to be a key part of whether she looks forward to or is frustrated by the oral you give her. Typically, Moans, "yeahs" and "oh my God"s mean "keep doing exactly what you're doing" though according to many of the women, I spoke with these are often interpreted as requests to change things up. Another respondent, J of Brooklyn, expressed it this way: "Moving back to foreplay-style moves like licking the inner thigh once a pattern and rhythm has already been established sucks. I'm trying to focus on an orgasm!"
Prolonged silences on the other hand, my require you to open other channels of communication. Don't be afraid to ask what she likes. Then do that thing. And while you're having those conversations, just make sure you don't say any of the phrases that you should never say to a naked woman .
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Be a Cunnilingus Master: How to Go Down On a Girl


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Depending on your familiarity with the term and the sex act it describes, “cunnilingus” might sound incredibly daunting, or just plain hot. 
Cunnilingus is a latin term for oral sex performed on a vagina. Typically, that means on a woman, but it can also be on a non-binary person who was assigned female at birth, or a transgender person with a vagina. 
So what does that entail, exactly? Well, like any sex act, it sort of depends on the two people involved. 
There are certain actions and moves that are more common, but the important thing is that you and the person you’re going down on are on the same page in terms of what feels good. Things that feel incredible to one person might feel uninteresting — or even painful — to another partner. The only way to know for sure is to talk to each other and try things out.
But in short, cunnilingus is typically focused on one partner licking the other person’s clitoris — or rather, the clitoral head, which is located directly above the vagina. Just in terms of what you can do with your mouth, it can also involve sucking on the clitoris, sucking on or licking the labia minora, or inserting your tongue into your partner’s vaginal opening.
Thought experiment: Imagine a woman rubbing your testicles against her clitoris until she climaxes. Then she turns to you in a post-coital fog of pleasure and says, “Was that good for you, too?” 
There’s a pretty good chance that’s never happened to you, but it’s not a completely alien concept to women, many of whom are used to sex being about a guy’s pleasure first and foremost — or in some unfortunate cases, exclusively about the guy’s pleasure. The upshot of that is that the central pleasure location on a woman’s body — the clitoris — still gets ignored by many guys. 
To put that in perspective, it would be like if during sex, the glans of your penis never touched any part of your partner’s body. In the testicle-rubbing-clitoris scenario above, you might feel some pleasure; after all, the testicles do have nerve endings and it can be deeply arousing when they’re touched. 
Also, you might be turned on just to be naked with another person, and it might be exciting to know that she’s aroused in your presence. But without any stimulation of your penis, you’re almost certainly not going to orgasm, and you’re probably going to be at least a little bit disappointed. 
The good news is, making sure your partner doesn’t experience the female version of that scenario isn’t particularly complicated — you just need to start incorporating clitoral stimulation into sex with the same regularity as penetration. And the best way to do that is through oral sex — aka cunnilingus.
It’s all well and good to decide to start engaging in cunnilingus, but without knowing what you’re doing, it can be daunting or, worse, wildly unsuccessful if and when you do start. 
To help prevent you from ending up with your head between your partner’s legs, gripped by a deep feeling of panic or confusion, we spoke to some sex experts about the basic tips you should know before you start eating someone out. 
As mentioned above, for many people, the main thrust of cunnilingus is licking the clitoral head, which pokes out from under the clitoral hood, just above the vaginal opening. Whether you’re looking for it or feeling for it by touch, finding it is an important first step in performing cunnilingus. 
For some people, it’ll be a little bit harder to find, depending on their body type, pubic hair, and the size of their clitoris and hood, but the hunt will be worth it. 
Once you’ve located your partner’s clitoris, well, start licking it! There are lots of different ways to lick your partner’s clit — quickly or slowly, using the whole length or your tongue or just the tip; softly or more powerfully. 
Here, you should be trying to figure out what your partner likes, so in the early going, it’s worth testing out different licking styles. Often, different techniques will feel good at different times; sometimes a method of licking that feels very good at one moment can be too intense the next, and so forth. 
The important thing is to be sensitive to anything your partner says (“Go faster!” or “Ooh! Too hard!”, etc.) and to pay attention to their breathing patterns or moaning. 
Often, when you hit a certain rhythm, it’ll be
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