Cumming On Glasses

Cumming On Glasses

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The Case for Keeping Your Glasses on During Sex
GloZell and Iskra Lawrence Give Advice to Kids on How to Handle Haters
GloZell, Isrka Lawrence, and Yara Shahidi reflect on getting teased when they were kids—and how they managed stay confident.
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I don't want to sound alarmist, but I've noticed what seems to be a looming sex crisis. Those with poor eyesight—and those attracted to those with poor eyesight—are making a critical bedroom mistake. No, it’s not the junior high awkwardness of trying to make out with someone who wears glasses while you're also wearing glasses (though there’s an element of adorable, familiar clumsiness to it). I’m talking about removing your spectacles before doing the deed. I urge you, my glasses-wearing cohorts, to consider keeping them on.
Imagine, if you will, a Tinder fairy tale : You’ve matched with the Clark Kent of your dreams, and beneath those thick black frames you just know there’s a Superman (or whatever non-heteronormative metaphor best works here) that you want to see naked. You go on a few dates (or just one, whatever makes you most comfortable) and decide it’s time to get busy. When the lights dim low and you undress your partner, they remove their glasses revealing…a completely different face and vibe than what you were first attracted to.
Maybe it was the way they pushed their delightfully nerdy lenses up when they slipped off their nose that made you go weak at the knees. Maybe you just have a later-in-life glasses fetish—which totally makes sense because glasses are great. Whatever the case, you have a great time but can’t help but think that something is slightly amiss. And that's because there is, my friend—there really is. They should’ve kept ‘em on.
And if you consider your non-glasses-wearing partner in the same scenario but reversed, you will realize that they like you as you are, Four Eyes!
I’ve been wearing glasses since I was 16 months old. At this point, they’re an extension of my face, an element of structure like dimples or freckles. Removing them creates an extra level of nudity that doesn't feel sexy—a vulnerability that permeates beyond sight.
The author, in all her bespectacled glory
So I very rarely remove my glasses while having sex (see above note about how it’s my face, etc.), and if memory serves, I have never explicitly been asked to—I imagine if a partner were to request that, it would be to protect the frames from breaking (which is nice) or because they had some classic high school movie kink where removing them is some sexy striptease (this is nice too if that’s your bag—consent is king). As a result of all of this, I just never feel the need to remove them before getting down to business.
But I wanted to discover if other people felt similarly, so I conducted my own scientific poll—a.k.a. I asked Twitter if folks took their frames off before getting between the sheets. I asked the question twice, changing the phrasing from, “Do you take your glasses off during sex?” to “Do you keep your glasses on during sex?” because I remember something from my college psych class about having a control and verbiage coloring your results. It just seemed like the right thing to do.
I wasn’t too surprised to find that most Tweeters said they don’t wear glasses—though the Vision Council of America suggests 75 percent of adults require some sort of vision correction (however, it doesn’t break down what percentage are part-time wearers, how much of that population goes untreated, or opts for contacts, or Lasik eye surgery, and so on). I was surprised to see an overwhelming majority of folks admit to never taking off their glasses, and some non-glasses wearers revealed that their glasses-wearing partners would take them off all the time. This isn’t the most accurate reading—I’m not a scientist—but it does seem like a bummer.
By removing glasses before intercourse, we four-eyes of the world are forgetting one crucial thing: Aside from physical health conditions outside of our control, the majority of us choose to wear glasses. We could get Lasik, we could poke at our eyes with glass (plastic?) contacts day in and day out (again, I’m dedicated to spectacles), but we choose glasses.
The '90s hit "She's All That" is kind of a classic glasses fetish movie.
Why? Because they’re cute and handsome, and we look good in them. People find us sexually attractive in them, and they are part of the reason we’re so damn cute and handsome and good-looking.
In a particularly memorable episode in the third season of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, resident badass/recent divorcée Brandi Glanville mentions that she owns a pair of glasses that she keeps only for the bedroom. While that’s not totally true—she’s since made it a trend to wear them out and about and look oh-so-fabulous when she does—it’s still an inspiring thought. If all of us glasses wearers could embrace our inner (and outer) Brandi Glanvilles and take our frames to the bedroom, we’d probably have better sex because of it.
And for what it’s worth, “glasses” is a popular tag on a lot of porn sites. People are into our frames, specifically and especially for sex reasons. We should be too.
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