Cuckold Angst

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Cuckold Angst
Home - Cuckold Guides - What To Do When Facing Deep Cuckold Regret and Angst
So you shared your wife and either during or after you got hit with the most intense emotions of pain, regret, anxiety, and confusion. Some people have these feelings as well as facing powerful arousal about the situation but this isn’t always the case and it can be a rollercoaster of emotions that you don’t really see a lot of people talking about.
My wife Sarah and I have seen and done it all, we were once newbies and the first time we ever shared my wife, I had some feelings of regret and it was a difficult situation to come to terms with. You can see my first-time here.
When my wife and I first did it, there was a flash of regret that rippled across my mind, I wondered if we had acted on impulse, if this would change everything and if my wife would look at me in the same way but it didn’t and we both came to terms with it and cuckolding has worked out very well for us.
However, if you’re here you may be asking yourself if it was a big mistake or you may be wondering if people do face regret after cuckolding.
We want to normalize regret and angst, it’s totally normal but understanding that the feelings will most likely arise after you have done it and take a while to fizzle away is key to having a great experience and understanding the changes you are making to your relationship. You may have done it before and now be looking for answers or you may be ready to try cuckolding and educating yourself on mistakes and regrets, all of this is good and no matter where you are on your journey, learning about these emotions that come associated with this lifestyle is a great move and a step in the right direction.
So, what causes all this regret and angst most cucks feel? Often as a cuckold what you crave is also what will hurt the most and with a lot of cucks, the biggest amount of pain = the most intense arousal. The idea of your wife staying at another man’s house, cuddling him, watching Netflix with him, sucking his cock and letting him fuck her with no condom, all turns you on, but also makes you restless.
Sometimes new cuckolds don’t understand their emotions and why they are feeling a certain away about something they have always wanted and so I wanted to outline some of the feelings and explain to you why they usually happen.
This is what really causes the cuckold angst and discomfort:
It’s really easy, in my time in the lifestyle I’ve spoken to so many guys about cuckolding, threesomes and the lifestyle and what is awesome is that most of the bad emotions that you don’t want you can avoid if you take the right steps. Following my steps, you will also face the problem before it’s too late and it will give you time to consider if it’s really an option for you and your partner or not.
The steps to avoiding bad cuckolding experiences and emotions:
If you want to follow a guide, this here it’s my cuckold training manual and it shows you the steps on becoming a successful and confident cuckold.
Don’t share your wife as the very first step, try signing up to Tinder together and having her flirt and sext some other men, then try the webcam method ( find out if you’re a cuckold ) and have her play with another man online, while you watch.
This will help you find out if you’re a cuck or just think you are. Then watch her flirt with someone in real life, maybe go to a sex club, then try a soft swap, maybe with another couple or with a guy. Then move onto a threesome and finally a solo date. If you go slow you’ll also get little amounts of the emotion and you will be able to see how easily you deal with it and what issues you need to work on first.
Watch porn , read erotica , join a forum or two, ( join our cuckold membership ), ask questions, and make a list of what you like and what you don’t like. Your wife should do the same (if she’s open to it). This list will help you avoid certain pain and it will put you both onto the same page.
You should also work out what part of cuckolding you enjoy. Is it solo dates, voyeurism, texts, threesomes, bi-sexual/sissy, humiliation, etc. (Read all of the cuckold fantasies we have). You need to find what it is that you both definitely like the sound of and explore that through things like erotica, sex clubs, porn, and other ventures.
The view that some couples give is that there is no respect, the wife cheats as she pleases and the cuck is worthless and this is going to work for everyone. When in fact all of the couples that I’ve met and seen, this is an act, it’s part of the fantasy and behind the scenes, there is a massive amount of respect and love for one another. Don’t let the cock cages and humiliation make you think that is how your relationship has to be all the time. It’s part of it and if you’re the right type of couple it will be a thing that is turned off and on when and as you both please.
Most couples have a list of rules, these can be changed over time and always will be once you learn what you really do like and dislike. However, starting with a list of do’s and don’ts and a list of fake do’s and don’ts is important. An example of fake do’s and don’ts is things you don’t want them to do, but actually want them to do in the heat of the moment, this is all part of the fantasy. Then there’s the real list, anything that is done on this list is a big no-no. We created a list of Cuckold rules that you can pick and choose from if you need some inspiration.
It’s a good idea to set clear boundaries with the man your wife or girlfriend is going to be fucking. Make these boundaries together and let your bull know, they can be absolutely anything that you don’t want, for instance: no turning up at the house announced, no thinking you’re in a relationship, this is just sex, no hand-holding, no anal sex, etc. It’s one of the reasons finding a bull who has had some experience with a few hotwives is so important, the beginners can sometimes (not always) come along with a weird understanding and even creepy energy that you won’t want in your life.
It also doesn’t hurt to have a cuckold aftercare routine , a way for you both to connect again after.
At the start it’s a good idea to keep the lifestyle away from your friends, people do talk and until you have a few new friends in the lifestyle it’s a good idea to not share with people you know. It can seem the easiest to get a best friend to play with your wife, but once the excitement is gone for your wife and she wants to move onto another man it can leave a creepy friend who now thinks he is part of your relationship and you will find you have now mixed friendship with cuckolding.
Find new friends to play with is the best advice I can give you and keep the two groups seperate. The only time I would suggest mixing with friends is if they completely understand and you are all completely honest, open and respectful.
I find with a lot of people in our community who are starting out there is so much guilt and quite a lot of repression associated with wanting to share your wife/girlfriend with another man. The truth is, loads of men want to try it out and loads of men do it, most of which you would never realize do it anyway.
You’re not weird for wanting this experience and you should never feel guilty for these emotions, even if your wife/girlfriend doesn’t understand. Reach out to people, join a few forums and lifestyle Reddit pages. and you’ll see that there’s an awesome community behind this and for the people who don’t understand It’s not your job to explain to people why you like what you like.
If discussing everything with your girlfriend/wife turns you both on, you both understand the consequences and the outcomes of the sitations and you are both ready for new emotions, scenarios and experiences and you have eased yourself slowly into the cuckolding lifestyle, then this commuynity is for you and if you want to ask any questions, just send us a message or leave a comment below any of our articles.
My girlfriend and I our in our late twenties, we’ve been together over 10 years and opened our relationship up 5 years ago. This is our exact experience with cuckolding and it has what we do to keep ourselves safe, what my girlfriend and I love and the things we…
This is everything you need to become a cuckold. In this training guide you’ll find out: - What type of cuckold you are? - How to simulate cuckolding with sex toys. - The road to becoming a full cuck (without emotional issues). - How to find a respectful bull who…
I’ve always wanted to watch my husband clean up after another man. The idea of my husband cleaning my cum filled pussy and then slowly cleaning off the mans cock who was just having sex with me. I had no idea how to bring this up with my husband, but…
I'm the cuckold of cuckin.com. I write about my experiences sharing Sarah and about the things I learned. I've been a cuck for the past 4 years of our relationship, but have been studying this lifestyle for the past 10 years, when I first found out I got turned on by the idea of my partner being with other men.
Thanks for all of this info. I feel like the word “trust” covers it all. Trust in total transparency, trust in her telling all the details and emotions of the event, answering every question. Trust that she is totally yours and you are totally hers and that this has all to do with variety and nothing to do with love. Trust the you won’t get turned off and leave.
Thanks for the comment Devon! You’re so right, trust is key to making a relationship work, especially if you want to open things up. – Sarah <3
Exceptional advice much appreciated!!
Very well written article. You know your subject matter and can get it across to people.
Thank you for the article. I sent this to my gf as well and we both found it helpful. The only thing I think the artice neglected to pay more attention to is dealing with the thoughts and emotions themselves after the fact. Most of the advice given here are “precautionary measures”. But what if you never read this article and because of ignorance you did exactly the opposite (for example, letting your partner go to a solo date for your first cuckolding experience). How are you going to deal with the jealousy and angst and regret? Are there thoughts you can tell yourself to feel better? Are there tools or exercises? I am asking becaus I am in this boat. Shared my partner in a solo date and now I’m in pain. We should’ve taken it slowly. I get the precautionary measures you’ve outlined here (we will do it). But what can I do to feel better now?
I am in this same situation. It was our first experience and she went on a solo date with a guy met on tinder who didn’t actually know about what cuckolding is. I really felt excluded and I’m really in pain now. I don’t know what to do, I didn’t want it to happen like this.
For the guys who already ventured into the experience without preparing yourself mentally. The worst thing you can do for your relationship is to blame her for anything. This will 100% hurt your relationship and increase the pain.
1) You wanted this and you probably encouraged her to do it while enjoying the rush.
2) This was something you did together, do not blame her or call her name’s. Even if you feel betrayed or angry. Your mind will play tricks on you, maybe even make you think she legit cheated. Remind yourself it was an experience between both of you and she did it for you!
3) The crazy feelings will pass and you will want it again, if you react badly now, odds are she will decline any future kinks due to you being unstable and unhappy now. At this point accept what happened, reclaim her and everytime a negative thought pops in remind your self of the above points. You wanted this, you did it together. It won’t take long for the pain to pass and you will want to go again.
My wife went on a date to the movies with a guy we are mutually think would be great for our first time. As they were at the movies, they both started to touch each other outside of there clothing and that was as far as they went. Once she returned home she told me everything that happened and shown me first hand the touching. I had a roller coaster emotion ride and don’t know how to handle this. I am very excited about what happened, but also conflicted. Any advice would be great. I think I would be happier being present and she is agreeing that may be what my feels are. Both are not sure
Thank you for this nice article. It really outlines the way u shoul start ur relationship as cuck. I am in cuckold relationship for 6 years now and I am experincing different fantansies. Currently Im in chastity cage for almost 16 hours a day snd I am allowed to cum once per month , a lot of are ruined orgasms. My mistress wife have sex with me twice per year and those feels amazing. She has sex with different bulls weekly. I really enjoy this life. But most importantly, we have true love and respect for each other. And despite all thd humiliation I got duringthe cuckold sessions. It fades away once the bull goes home and we set bsck toghther. Again I love her soo much and does feel the same for me
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A common theme in cuckolding is the experience of “angst”.

What is your most intense or memorable experience of cuckold angst?

Angst refers to the feeling of deep anxiety, shame, anticipation, fear, excitement, and/or humiliation in the context of cuckolding.

Angst can be positive or negative, it can happen before, during, or even after cuckolding, and it can be intentionally projected on the cuckold, indirectly experienced due to the situation, or even self-inflicted by the cuckold.
For me, the closest I’ve come to is when my wife and I were on vacation with friends, she appeared to be flirting with one of my friends, and when I complained to her about it privately, she smiled and told me to stop acting all whiny and jealous, or else she would give me something to worry about. She did not do anything, at least to my knowledge, but it certainly made my angst meter go nuts.
I can think of two things that cause me angst:

Once was the one time I specifically asked my wife not to sleep with a guy. She did it anyway and told me it wasn't fair to give her freedom with one hand and then dictate to whom she could have sex with the other. She told me in no uncertain terms to learn to deal with it because she had no intention of stopping. When she left and I knew she was meeting him it's the most I have ever felt like a true cuckold in my whole life. She was openly off to have sex with another man, I disapproved of it and tolerated it anyway. In retrospect it turns me on AND it still gives me angst!

The other situation is when she meets random hook ups off Tinder, which she hasn't' done since before COVID but has said she plans on resuming again soon. The simple knowledge that my wife is leaving our home to meet a stranger she will have sex with later that evening causes me angst. She doesn't bother to hide that she's married on tinder so I know some guy is getting the satisfaction of not only sleeping with my wife but the added thrill of knowing he has made a cuckold of me. Because she doesn't know what she'd be walking into going to a stranger's home, she always brings tinder dates back to our place and fucks them in our second bedroom, so I hear it all quite clearly too.
The first time I experienced cuckold angst, and the most intense was the very first time I was cuckolded. My first wife and I had only been married a couple of months and I came home one evening to find her getting ready to go out. She informed me that her old boss from back home was in town and had invited her to dinner. She never even asked me if I wanted to go, she just told me my dinner was in the oven and left. She didn't return until well after midnight and when she came to bed I tried to initiate sex with her. She told me she had a headache and turned her back to me. I was positive she had been out with another guy and had gotten fucked before coming home, and to this day I still believe that. I laid there in the dark thinking about her fucking someone else and ended up going to the bathroom to masturbate because I was so horny thinking about her fucking another guy.

I really wanted to confront her about it but I never did. She was very strong willed and I have always been submissive around women. She was a 5'9" redhead and very hot and I already felt that I had married above my level. I basically decided that I could accept her fucking other guys as long as she stayed with me, not to mention that the thought of her fucking someone else made my dick hard. She went on to openly cuckold me with my sister's ex-husband about a year later. He was staying with us after he and my sister split up because he needed some place to stay for a while and he was also my best friend. My wife fucked him for a couple of months while he stayed with us and continued to fuck him for a couple of months after he moved out, until he got a serious girlfriend.
I had that for the first few months when we began this, but it went away as more experiences came about. I didn't realize at the time how much that angst actually enhanced my excitation at first. For a while after I no longer had that anxiety, I missed it.

But I'm not complaining.

~ Des
Our hotwife history from its beginning at viewtopic.php?f=5&t=50057
I respect our live in bull even though he humiliates me and talks down to me. In a way I think I am in love with him.
two times stick out the most in my mind. The first time I found out that she had messed around and fucked another man and most recently with our current situation going fully pussy free from her. The first time was very mild just what am I doing m, I enjoy this she enjoys it we are all having fun and so forth. This last time I was off for a day. Her saying to me he will own my pussy and your not allowed to have penetration with your penis really hit me hard. It was something we discussed and talked about prior to being something we both enjoyed but for some reason it just hit me extremely hard. I knew she enjoyed and I knew I would enjoy it but at the same time that hesitation and thought process of what are you doing tore into me. This lifestyle is truely a mental one as well as a physical one.
For me, it was the moment when my wife told me she wanted someone else to take her virginity. It was her first time, something truly special, and the fact that she wanted it with some stranger for the sake of a fetish was quite something, at the time. In the end I was there for her, though, and I feel like sitting at her side made us closer than we ever could have been if I was the one taking it.
Lila has fucked around hundreds of times but the most angst was when we went slumming at a quick stop in the hood one summer night, she let two black men chat her up in parking lot after buying cigs. The 3 just started walking away down a dark parking lot leaving me in car watching. They stopped and she let them open her blouse and suck her tits. I thought she might be done so i cruised over to them. She saw me and said “keep on going” firmly and waved me away. I drove to other end of lot and watched them escort her around the end of a strip mall. I got out and peered around corner where i watched them strip her naked standing up. They found some cardboard, laid her down and both fucked her. What a night. She learned to crave black dick that night and never looked back
Nah, it was all part of the plan. Both her and I always fucked and came hard talking about us trying that out. She came
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