Crazy Wife
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Crazy Wife
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Let’s talk about dealing with a ‘crazy’ wife.
In my role as a life coach, I am often helping people improve at understanding and communicating with their loved ones.
That’s why I’m keen to discuss this topic with you.
The term ‘crazy’ is often overused and exaggerated, so let’s begin by establishing what’s going on in your marriage.
Are you saying your wife has lost her mind? She’s deranged? She’s a danger to herself and others around her? This is the true definition of ‘crazy’, in which case you need assistance from a clinical psychologist.
This is a term often harshly and mistakenly used when someone’s wife is having severe mood swings. If your wife is quick to lose her temper or become very upset? We’ll explore how to deal with this below.
This is a more sensitive way of phrasing it, as it puts the focus on you rather than her. Yes, it can be difficult to deal with severe mood swings, especially if you don’t understand why they’re occurring. So, let’s explore how to address the situation now.
Below, I’ve listed 22 ideas that should help you restore parity in your marriage.
The first thing to do is to take stock of what’s wrong. Is she actually ‘crazy’? Does she have a mental illness? Do you need a clinical psychologist, or is this something you can figure out alone? In most cases, it will be the latter.
This shows a lack of empathy and understanding to her situation, and she may take offense. It’s only going to make the problem worse.
Even if she’s being incredibly emotional, fighting fire with fire won’t help. If you can keep your cool while talking about your issues, this will stop her emotions from escalating further.
Throughout arguments, it’s common for the angry person to resort to irrational statements and harsh words. Keep things on track by remaining rational as you talk to her.
Ask her what’s making her act so differently. Keep an open mind as far as what she says. Don’t jump in to argue your point just yet. Seek first to understand then to be understood .
Engage in active listening. If your wife feels heard, that should really help to calm her down. She might hurt your feelings. You might want to jump in and point fingers at what she’s done wrong. As tempting as that might be, it’s better to wait until she’s said everything she wants to say.
If your ‘crazy’ wife blames you for her erratic moods, it might feel natural for you to deny all of her accusations. Indeed, that’s what leads to accusations such as “my wife is crazy”. A more progressive step is to take your time to consider what she said and really have a good think about what you’re willing to do to be a better husband.
Once she’s finished talking and you’ve had time to consider it, share your honest feelings about how her so-called ‘crazy’ outbursts make you feel. Work together to decide how you can both prevent them from happening again in future.
During these calm discussions, it’s a good time to start talking about boundaries for her behavior in future. If you continue to accept her ‘crazy wife’ outbursts, they’ll often continue to occur. So, establish what behavior you will accept and what’s going to happen if she crosses the line. Of course, this should be done in a loving way, which your wife accepts and agrees with.
It may occur that your wife starts to get a little crazy over some things you don’t agree with. Even so, it’s sometimes better to let it slide. That’s what compromise is about in a marriage. Sometimes, it’s better to let her win a battle if it means winning the overall war of a more peaceful marriage.
If she’s going through a stressful time because of something outside your relationship, consider lifting some of the weight off her shoulders as far as household responsibilities.
On top of that, cook her a nice meal or run her a bubble bath. These minor things can do a lot to help her to de-stress. More importantly, they show you care, so she’ll hopefully be less likely to take out her external stresses on you.
If she’s going crazy due to your lack of help around the house, that’s another reason to start pitching in. It’s part of being a family to help each other through the stresses of life.
A night in with her favorite movie. A trip to her favorite restaurant with her best friends. A family getaway to some cool faraway location. Do your best to be the good guy that makes her forget her problems, rather than the ‘crazy husband’ who causes them.
Oftentimes, when a ‘crazy wife’ is nagging about irrational things, it’s a cry for attention. In many cases, she simply wants to feel seen and heard . You can often help to eliminate a lot of the crazy nagging behavior in a relationship by spending time with her and making her feel like a queen.
Love conquers all. Most marital problems can be overcome when there’s enough love in the relationship. It’ll never hurt for a woman to hear that their man loves them. Just make sure you’re working on showing it, as well as saying it.
If your wife wants to know more about what you’re doing when she’s not around, don’t be afraid to tell her. Yes, it can be annoying to check in with your wife every so often. But, if it helps to ease her fears, it’s surely a sacrifice worth making.
Let’s try and break the cycle of her getting upset and you fixing the situation. Be proactive – and think of ways to make your wife happy ahead of time. This way, you avoid having to deal with a crazy wife altogether.
When things get heated during arguments, it can be tempting to resort to calling names, passive-aggressiveness or putting each other down. It might help you to feel better in the moment. At the same time, it does nothing to solve your relationship problems in the long term.
If you have a ‘crazy wife’, don’t hide from the problems. Don’t try and numb yourself with booze or anything else. Admit your relationship needs work and step up to the challenge. If things get tough for you, don’t hesitate to confide in friends or family members for support.
If you’re struggling to reach a compromise in any of your discussions, consider bringing in a couples counselor. They can work as an intermediary to help you have a productive conversation without it descending into chaos.
If your wife is making your life tough, it’s perfectly normal to feel a bit of resentment. But, again, this isn’t helpful to fixing your relationship. Be strong. Try to have empathy and focus on fixing how she’s feeling.
Remember why you married this woman in the first place. This is still an amazing woman who’s struggling with her mental health . When you married this person, you promised to love her in sickness and health. Don’t give up on her now.
When you’re in the middle of a tough period of your relationship, it can feel like such a very long time. It might seem like this period of your life will never end. But these tough moments will pass, especially if you put in the work to fix them. Before you know it, this will be a thing of the past long ago. Your relationship can still thrive in spite of these choppy waters.
I’d like to round off the article with the answers to some frequently asked questions surrounding women and mental health.
It’s a defining aspect of femininity for women to be more connected to their emotions than men. This brings lots of positive qualities, particularly in family life. It makes mothers naturally fantastic at caring and nurturing for their kids, for example.
It’s common for the female reproductive system to have a stronger impact on their mood than men. This system is constantly going through changes and it can sometimes be difficult to cope with. This is particuarly true during times of dramatic change, such as pregnancy or menopause.
Pregnancy takes a huge toll on the female body and their hormones. The whole thing can be extremely unnerving to deal with. It’s only natural for this to result in mood swings. When you also consider the physical symptoms of pregnancy, it’s perfectly natural to expect a woman might have a few emotional ’off’ days during this part of her life.
Why Is My Wife Crazy After Having A Baby?
It’s not just the physical toll of giving birth. Having a baby is very stressful. It’s tough to adapt to family life. Post-partum depression is a mental illness that’s also a risk.
Just because you’re adapting well to fatherhood, it doesn’t mean your partner should be expected to be dealing with family life just as well.
Why Is My Wife Crazy During Menopause?
Menopause is another time of great hormonal change, which brings a lot of unpleasant symptoms.
These include mood swings, hot flashes and weight gain. As a husband, it’s your job to realize and respect that isn’t the easiest time in a woman’s life. It can cause mental health issues, even if all other parts of her life are going swimmingly.
It would be naive to suggest that divorcing your wife isn’t an option in modern society. Still, I’d recommend reading this guide on things to consider before bailing on your relationship , before you pull the trigger.
Thanks for reading my guide on dealing with a ‘crazy’ wife. I hope it helps you make positive strides in your marriage. Good luck!
If you have any questions or would simply like to leave some positive feedback, feel free to use the comments section below.
It would be great to talk further on this topic.
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Okay, so when my husband and I first started hanging out, he was just coming out of a relationship, and I was currently in one. So, when he began telling me that he didn’t like women because, in the end, they were all crazy, my question to him was “were they crazy when you met them?”
Don’t get me wrong, I know plenty of people that I would describe as a crazy wife, but within their craziness are factors that you can’t see.
There is such a thing as a crazy wife though. I have seen it; truth be told, I have been one once or twice, or a thousand times. So, although we all can be a little off kilter at times, if you are consistently misbehaving, it might be a little more than just a bad mood.
25 things that bring out the crazy wife and how to put her away
Women are conditioned to handle everything. A multi-tacker at heart, there is only so much she can handle before she unhinges. If you have a crazy wife, then chances are good that you are doing something that is fostering it by not helping to stop it.
Whether it is ignoring her, not being appreciative of her, or running from her, if she wasn’t crazy before you met her and you got to marriage before the crazy came out, then you are doing something to perpetuate it. I promise.
If you just use these decoders and proceed with care, then you can either stop the crazy once it comes out the closet, or at best, tame the beast before it devours you. [Read: 12 signs you’re the selfish one in the relationship ]
#1 Nothing NEVER means nothing… probe more . If you ask her what is wrong and her answer is nothing, or if she uses the phrase “it’s fine,” those are two code words for things aren’t fine, and it isn’t nothing. Those types of passive aggressive answers mean that you best start figuring out what you did wrong before all hell breaks loose.
#2 Know her monthly cycle to avoid conflict . Yep, we turn just slightly crazier before our periods. If you know when it is about to happen, you can avoid the tide. Giving her a little extra breathing room, a little more help, or showing her just a little more concern during certain times of the month can help her get through the rough week ahead for you both. [Read: 20 things you should never say to girls on their period ]
#3 When she is talking to you, she assumes you are listening, so do so. If she is talking to you, then put your phone down, or stop watching television for the five minutes of your time she needs, and instead of just watching her lips move, actually listen.
I know that it seems like 90% of what we say you don’t need to know, but to avoid the crazy wife, you have to do this.
#4 If she won’t look you in the eye, that spells trouble . If she’s so mad that she can’t look you in the eye, you did something. Ask her what you did immediately instead of trying to ride it out.
#5 When she slams doors, drawers, or plates around, that means “get your ass off of the couch and help.” Nope she isn’t just being sloppy, she is PISSED. [Read: 16 reasons why some people are always taken for granted ]
#6 If she is angry, don’t ignore it. I mean don’t ever ignore it! Just like a two-year-old, the more you ignore an angry woman, the angrier you make her. Suck it up, grow a pair, and find out what is making her so mad. Hell, even apologize.
#7 Anniversaries and birthdays are a huge friggin’ deal. Don’t ask why… they just are. [Read: 8 relationship dates men should never, ever forget ]
#8 If she is in a fight with her bestie, you are too, ghosting is a team effort. That includes family members too. You always take her side, period.
#10 Even if you know she’s on her period, don’t mention it or point it out, especially if she’s being extra crazy. Her period is something that you don’t ever talk about out in the open unless she initiates it.
#11 If she asks if you want to go somewhere, she isn’t really asking you, she is telling you. If she asks if you want to do something, you should just say “yes” and mark your calendar.
#12 When you walk through the door and get that look *yep, guys we all know it*, have heavy shoulders and jump right in to help with whatever it is that she’s struggling with. Put her off guard by immediately asking “what’s wrong” or “hey you look like you need help,” instead of pulling away and disappearing.
#13 If the trash is placed by the door, that means “take out the trash.” So do it. [Read: Best husband ever! 10 gestures that make a man a brag-worthy catch ]
#14 If she makes a sigh sound while picking up your socks, shirts, and jeans that means, “screw you.” For a week or two maybe just try to hit the hamper, or even better, take your own shit to the laundry room.
#15 When she is mad if you say “I love you” sincerely, she will forgive you and put the crazy away *I swear!* I know every guy reading this is saying “no way, that won’t work.” Guess what, it will. If you are sincere and you just say it, it melts the crazy wife away.
#16 If she is talking aggressively to you, listen to the words instead of reading her body language; they will give you the answer. Don’t be confused by her agitated body language. She might not be a crazy wife, listen to her words, she might just be stressed out.
#17 The crazy eyes aren’t going away. If you run, they are going to chase your ass. [Read: Cute and really sweet ways to make your woman happy ]
#18 Those tiny comments do mean something . Passive aggressive, aggressive aggressive, if she makes a tiny comment, it means something really big so don’t think that your wife is just teasing or being funny.
#19 A passive aggressive text message should be answered with an “I’m sorry,” even if you aren’t . The best way to avert a crazy wife is just to suck it up and say you are sorry. You can fight it out and maybe be right, maybe not. Or you can avoid three days’ worth of misery and just say “sorry.”
#20 Duck and weave, just duck and weave . Sometimes a crazy wife can come and go like the wind, literally. If you want to make her go back to where she came from, then you have to duck and weave by letting her take the lead.
That means if she’s mad, apologize. If she’s sad, hold her. If she hates you, then just let her be. It is going to take you trying a couple of maneuvers at times to navigate her mood. [Read: 25 must-follow relationship rules for happy love ]
#21 If you hear her slam the toilet seat down you better apologize asap. You have no idea what it is like to land your ass on a cold toilet in the middle of the night!
#22 Don’t be Captain Obvious… she knows she burnt the toast, dinner, or dented her car . If she does something stupid, you don’t have to point it out. She feels stupid and bad enough, just let her have it and pretend it is no big deal.
#23 Going out for a guys’ night after getting into an argument or a fight with her is more than likely not a good idea . If the body is still cold, then stay in and let it settle. There will be other nights, I promise. Otherwise, you are going to come home to an even crazier wife.
#24 Your passive aggressiveness doesn’t make you the better person, if you have something to say, man up and friggin’ say it. We hate when you give us the “nothing” too, so don’t. If you have a problem, then don’t make us beg, that makes us CRAZY.
#25 When you come home from vacation, don’t complain about how “tired” you are or try to tell us how you didn’t have a good time. We don’t care. If you were lucky enough to get away and left her at home to watch the kids, then keep your tired pity party to yourself. [Read: How to be happy in a marriage ]
Overworked, feeling under-appreciated, and pissed that she never even gets to go to the store on her own, you are going to find a crazy wife if you whine about how your bad behaviors made you tired.
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