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Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
Title pretty much explains it but to help you out even further, let me explain what we're doing here.
As most of you know the site craigslist.org offers an array of free listings for anything you can think of. Apartment rentals, moving companies, dog-sitters, and even match-making. But what if none of that concerns you? What if all you have is a stark erection and some extra cash? Well; Craigslist also offers an "Adult Services" section where you can find various ladies (even trannies) who are willing to do a lot of things your girlfriend is too afraid to try, all with the convenience of not annoying you with useless conversation and getting the fuck out of your house afterwards.
Now of course prostitution is 100% illegal except in most of Nevada and indoors in Rhode Island. However these are not prostitutes; they are escorts. These "providers" are simply searching for generous "hobbyists" who offer "roses" in exchange for time spent together, because there is no law against charging someone to spend time with you. Whatever you do during that time is between 2 consenting adults.
So Newgrounds, what we're doing here is finding what you would determine to be the best hooker on your area's craiglist site. Of course some areas are only limited to a state or a region and aren't city specific, but still try to find one close to you.
HERE'S WHAT WE AREN'T DOING BECAUSE IT'S TOTALLY AGAINST THE RULES
1) Prank calling
2) NSFW pictures
3) Posting "HEY I'M ACTUALLY GONNA FUCK THIS 1 CHICK GUYS PLZ DON'T CALL THE COPS!"
Easiest thing to do is just post the link to the ad and explain why they caught your attention.
*bonus points though if you find someone who you know from past or present*
1) www.craigslist.org
2) Select your area
3) In the 2nd column towards the bottom is a section called "Services." In there is the section labeled "Adult."
4) Click the W4M section. I guess this technically is optional but if you're looking for a gay dude or TS go for it.
5) Find the funniest, weirdest, or maybe even best looking one and write why you picked them.
*note - obviously a lot of these ads are probably using fake pictures so you probably shouldn't think that someone who could make it as a supermodel is sucking dick for $50 near you*
My pick is Alisha . I really enjoy her contrasting font colors, her very vivid description of herself ("Im a very interesting young lady"), and that she assists you in ensuring you're not a cop by letting you know to dial *82 on your phone first. Plus she can either drive to your house, or you come to her house...... or unlocked motel room that she squats in. Plus she has that look that you would be proud to bring her home for the family thanksgiving dinner and tell mom and dad, "I put it in her butt."
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
I chose the 2nd one because the first entry was a picture of the girl's bum. I guess her face wasn't all that great.
And trust me, you won't be dissappointed
Call me now for the time of your life!
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
Whoohoohoo check out this oil strike right here. First roll and landed right on Park Place ha ha.
http://newhaven.craigslist.org/cas/13701 08579.html
NSFW
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
After about 6 entries the images started 404'ing. Is that common? I'm guessing they're images being flagged or something, though i've no idea.
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
Well done man. 10/10 will read again.
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
No way dude! That's rolling doubles, passing GO, collecting your cash, landing on community chest, getting the "Advance to GO" card, rolling again, hit chance, then get the "Advance to Boardwalk"; all while she's sucking your dick.
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
How come no one has mentioned any hawt male hookers yet? Funny how its in the SF bay area...
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
LOL. Figuring everyone else was trying to be a masseuse this stuck out sorely. I also liked the part where she points out she will not ever meet you ever, don't even ask.
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
YOU CAN DO ANYTHING TO MY FEET GUYS WHATEVER YOU WANT THERE NO HOLDS BAR. CALL i WILL COME TO YOUR HOUSE, HOTEL, OFFICE ANYWHERE YOUR FANTASY DESIRES
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
I think it happens when something is flagged on the site, not positive though.
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
It's probobly not ever her in that pic.
click me to get free cookie!
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
hoho (get it?) we got the first fail of the thread
----------------------------------------
but this is the only one that didnt seem too fake and had a decent looking girl
the more you hate it, the stronger it gets
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
He looks like Steve-O and the black Scrubs had a baby then peed on it and left it behind a dumpster at Gold's Gym.
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
Haha. Upscale location. She's in a motel
http://newlondon.craigslist.org/ads/1367 558673.html
This one because unfortunately he looks just like me....... well a bit darker and more muscle bound.
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
Oh; could you imagine calling both of them? Yeah.....
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
but i have a back up plan, TAKE THIS!!
the more you hate it, the stronger it gets
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
Ah, she's completely fake. Exact same description for my city. Also notice the generic email addresses.
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
well then this is the only other good looking one, in my city atleast, but im guessing it's fake
(no girl like that would want 30+yr guys)
the more you hate it, the stronger it gets
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
She lives near me, but I would not go near that shit if my life depended on it.
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
the more you hate it, the stronger it gets
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
Watermark on picture
claims to be 5'1, which she doesn't look like on the pic.
My signature was old so I changed it.
Response to
Best Craigslist Hooker In Your Area
Sep 11, 2009
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