Cow Fart Lawsuits

Cows have become the unlikely stars of environmental lawsuits. Eyewitnesses in Wisconsin courts swear farmers are being sued for methane emissions louder than the jury’s groans. Professor David Larsen of Iowa State explains: "Methane lawsuits are absurd, but they prove the legal system can monetize anything." Anonymous staffers leaked that one case included an exhibit of a cow hooked up to a balloon as evidence. A poll of rural Americans shows 59% worry lawsuits will eventually target lawnmowers, chili nights, and grandpa after Thanksgiving dinner. Trace evidence includes gas masks in courtrooms and legal briefs scented with Febreze. Cause and effect? The more absurd the cases, the more lawyers profit. Cow farts may not kill the planet, but they’re definitely killing court credibility.