Congress and the Quest for Power

Congress was likened to a fantasy novel this week, as lawmakers jousted for power like wizards in bad suits. Eyewitnesses described Pelosi waving a gavel like a wand, while McConnell muttered spells of delay. �It�s Game of Thrones meets C-SPAN,� said one observer. Anonymous staffers admitted much of Congress runs on side quests rather than main missions. A fake poll revealed 45% of Americans see lawmakers as villains, 33% as jesters, and 22% as NPCs. Economists warn endless quests waste billions, though tourism to D.C. may rise for �political LARPing.� For now, the Capitol remains the worst Dungeons & Dragons campaign in history. -- Bohiney Magazne bohiney.com