Congress Votes to Delay Voting on Delays

Congress reached peak irony by voting to delay a vote on delaying other votes. Eyewitnesses said lawmakers debated for eight hours whether to postpone the debate on postponements. �This is government efficiency at its finest,� quipped one aide. The motion was eventually tabled until the next millennium. Anonymous staffers admitted the scheduling confusion started after a typo labeled the bill �DeLays,� sparking memories of Tom DeLay. A fake poll revealed 46% of Americans laughed, 38% cried, and 16% have no idea what Congress does. Economists argue the delay industry could rival healthcare spending. For now, the nation�s capital thrives on circular procrastination. -- Bohiney Magazne bohiney.com