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You ever have that problem where you’re really hungry and really horny and you don’t know what to do?
Michete knows your pain. But in her new music video for “Yum Yum Big Slurp,” the Seattle-based rapper finds a cure for all that hungry hungry horniness that ails you. Just suck? A dick!
The video, directed by Sam Nulman and edited by Anthony Tocchio, finds Michete and a dozen or so LGBTQties dancing and kissing and pretending to eat each other out in some kind of nondescript nightlife setting tracked by the song from her mixtape Cool Tricks 3.
Like “Stupid Girl” last summer, the lyrics here are playful and some of the rhymes are unexpected (“Any time you ever get the itch let me help out / Down for whatever like a sellout / I can make you moan, make you scream, make you yell out / Skinny ass bitch, got a body like Bellsprout”). But my favorite part of “Yum Yum Big Slurp” might be the totally serious, straight to camera breakdown towards the end where Michete declares:
I’m gonna suck a dick if I want to I’m gonna lick a nut if I want to I’m gonna get fucked if I want to If I want to Bitch, fuck you
There’s even a beautiful moral at the end: “Everybody knows that sluts are the coolest.” It’s true!
Watch Michete’s “Yum Yum Big Slurp” video below.
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Best Of Phoenix ®
People & Places
2000
Best Men's Room Kiddy Porn
Buca di Beppo
Quizzed about who he'd cast as himself in a proposed made-for-TV movie based on his book America's Toughest Sheriff , Joe Arpaio offered up the names of actors Robert De Niro and Al Pacino.
Best Of Phoenix ®
People & Places
2000
Best Sign That Scottsdale's Women Have Gone to the Dogs
The Second Annual Bitches' Weekend
Grilled by reporters after several felony counts against her were dropped in November, former beauty queen Jill Scott -- an ex-Mrs. America and Mrs. Arizona best known for her appearances on local TV commercials for her ex-husband's Empire Glass windshield replacement company -- talked to the press corps about the ordeal. "It's been humiliating," said Scott, whose ex-husband claimed she'd stolen money from his company. "I've lost about five years of elasticity in my skin."
Best Of Phoenix ®
People & Places
2000
Best Mountain With a Gynecological Term Painted on It
Double Butte
Tempe's "A" Mountain is not the city's only painted butte. Head west on Broadway Road, and look south just before you hit the I-10 freeway, to check out the side of Double Butte -- about halfway up. There, just below a white painted cross, is the word "labia" in large letters. We have no idea how it got there; we're just happy as a, well, clam that it is.
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On second thought -- waiter, cancel the penne!
Day workers will help you move, landscape, paint, almost any chore that needs to be done. They have no set hourly price. However, do the right thing and pay what is mutually agreed upon. (Some workers have complained about getting stiffed for up to three days' work.)
Laborers gather in corners across the Valley. However, if you want guaranteed day labor, the corner of Broadway Road and Mesa Drive in Mesa is a sure bet. Up until noon every day of the week, all four corners of the intersection and adjacent streets are filled with guys eager to make a day's wage.
Pickup trucks pull up and a handful of them will jump in the bed. These men are eager to work and consider day labor a big boost to their economic situation; many send their earnings home and put a little aside in their savings.
But what about the women? We haven't found a comparable "official" group, but we did get an invite last spring to a chick trip that looked way better than any 20/30 charity golf tourney.
Cassidy and Katie Campana (daughters of former Scottsdale Mayor Sam) have made an annual tradition of gathering their girlfriends and their girlfriends' female dogs (along with ample libations appropriate for both species) and heading to the northern Arizona pine country for the ultimate bitch session.
The Campanas make grudging exceptions for male dogs, but otherwise the event is strictly off-limits to men. "This is an all-girl weekend . . . so save all your griping, but also all the juicy stories," the invitation reads.
But even jaded motorists will do a double take at the name emblazoned on several signs near the entrance to the Lost Dutchman State Park. Instead of bearing the names of the sponsoring do-gooders, these signs merely declare: "In loving memory of John Denver."
Yes, that John Denver. The "Rocky Mountain High" singer lived in the Rocky Mountains and died in 1997 when the plane he was piloting crashed near Monterey, California.
So why the Arizona tribute? Seems it's part of some fans' efforts to get John Denver Adopt-A-Highway signs -- and roadside cleanups -- in all 50 states.
Estrella Mountain Ranch 11800 South Golf Club Drive 602-468-0800
Estrella Mountain Ranch 11800 South Golf Club Drive 602-468-0800
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David Leibowitz is the smartest guy on local radio. Just ask him. Leibowitz's self-possession notwithstanding, this guy is head and shoulders above the rest of the radio rabble. He's informed, extremely quick and frequently ironic in an otherwise irony-free airspace. His print journalism background explains both his sinus-deep voice and his ink-stained depth. His is a talk show from which it's actually possible to learn something. Now if he'd just stop doing those dreadful eye surgery commercials.
Best Of Phoenix ®
People & Places
2000
Best Place to Have Fun Learning With the Kids
Mesa Southwest Museum
Best Of Phoenix ®
People & Places
2000
Best Place to Take the Kids for a Hot-Weather Picnic
Desert Breeze Park
Got a stage-struck young'n? Can't afford the tickets to see every show in town? How does seeing them all for free sound? Downtown's busiest theater has the best volunteer program around. They are always looking for new folks willing to tear tickets and lead patrons to their seats. Volunteers as young as 12 are accepted when accompanied by an adult, which makes this a perfect family activity. After calling the volunteer hot line number above, you will go to an orientation meeting, which includes a tour of one of the biggest performance spaces in town. After that, it's a matter of signing up to work the various plays that are always happening on the two stages at the center. Give your teen a chance to see everything from Shakespeare to Wallace & Ladmo while helping Phoenix's best local theater center keep up the good work.
Best Of Phoenix ®
People & Places
2000
Best Gaffes in a Movie Shot in Phoenix During the Past Year
"What Planet Are You From?"
Best Of Phoenix ®
People & Places
2000
Best Place to Prepare for the New Millennium
Laser Quest
Best Of Phoenix ®
People & Places
2000
Best Downtown Alternative Art Space
Modified
The closest thing to a one-stop shop of underground downtown culture is this bare-bones space carved out of an old brick building on Roosevelt. It's strictly an after-dark joint. The lights typically don't go on until 7 p.m. But once they do, the offerings are just as likely to include exhibitions by painters, sculptors and performance artists as they are performances by dancers, poets, jazz players and punk rockers. The featured artists are largely up-and-comers -- the bands are some of the primo ones on the indie music circuit. And the swarm of culture-driven people who fill the dark streets around the arthouse helps to strengthen the human beat of the old heart of the city.
More of an art incubator than an art barn, gallery owner Kraig Foote's seven-year-old art space gives talented young artists a commercial outlet that few would otherwise have. Most of the painters, sculptors, potters, woodworkers and glass blowers who show here still store their supplies in lockers and cabinets at local colleges, universities and high schools. But their works are often the artistic equal to those found in neighboring galleries along Scottsdale's art walk. Best of all, Foote's success hasn't lured him away from his original plan. Prices are still low, from $100 to $2,000. And fresh faces and art are always emerging from the gallery's pool of young talent.
Best Of Phoenix ®
People & Places
2000
Best Place to Indulge Your Fantasies of Being a Chinese Emperor
COFCO Chinese Cultural Center
Best Of Phoenix ®
People & Places
2000
Best Argument Against Investigative TV Reporting
Fox 10 News
Best Of Phoenix ®
People & Places
2000
Best Men's Room Kiddy Porn
Buca di Beppo
Quizzed about who he'd cast as himself in a proposed made-for-TV movie based on his book America's Toughest Sheriff , Joe Arpaio offered up the names of actors Robert De Niro and Al Pacino.
Best Of Phoenix ®
People & Places
2000
Best Sign That Scottsdale's Women Have Gone to the Dogs
The Second Annual Bitches' Weekend
Grilled by reporters after several felony counts against her were dropped in November, former beauty queen Jill Scott -- an ex-Mrs. America and Mrs. Arizona best known for her appearances on local TV commercials for her ex-husband's Empire Glass windshield replacement company -- talked to the press corps about the ordeal. "It's been humiliating," said Scott, whose ex-husband claimed she'd stolen money from his company. "I've lost about five years of elasticity in my skin."
Best Of Phoenix ®
People & Places
2000
Best Mountain With a Gynecological Term Painted on It
Double Butte
Tempe's "A" Mountain is not the city's only painted butte. Head west on Broadway Road, and look south just before you hit the I-10 freeway, to check out the side of Double Butte -- about halfway up. There, just below a white painted cross, is the word "labia" in large letters. We have no idea how it got there; we're just happy as a, well, clam that it is.
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2019
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2017
2016
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The Phoenix New Times may earn a portion of sales from products & services purchased through links on our site from our
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©2022
Phoenix New Times, LLC. All rights reserved.
Phoenix's independent source of
local news and culture
At the greatly revamped Mesa Southwest Museum, though, all that dull old stuff is now brilliantly weaved into an epic kid-friendly tale of Arizona, a tale that spans some three billion years and includes everything from meteors and trilobites to territorial jails and the making of the movie Wyatt Earp .
The star of the museum is its new Prehistoric Wing, a 40,000-square-foot display that doubled the museum's space when it opened in May. With giant automatronic dinosaurs and a towering waterfall, the new wing keeps the kids excited and engaged as they digest lots of hard science and history.
The museum also has two galleries that host changing exhibits as well as numerous hands-on programs for kids.
The museum's hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. Tuesdays through Saturdays and 1 to 5 p.m. on Sundays. Admission is $6 for adults and $3 for children 3 to 12. Children under 3 are free.
Readers' Choice for Best TV Newscaster: Liz Habib
Mel Blanc reincarnated, the vocally versatile Tingle regularly tickles prisoners of morning drive-time listeners as he single-throatedly creates the biggest assortment of wackos this side of a Farrelly Brothers flick. There's honky-hatin' ho "Clarissa Jenkins," the flatulent flatbacker who once flummoxed a locksmith with a cell phone call after she claimed to have accidentally locked herself in the trunk of her car -- in the middle of a serious attack of gas. Then there's the ever swishy "Ramon Jaworksy," whose lisping pleas for a pair of hunky bunkmates didn't cut much ice with the receptionist at a local military recruiting office. And who can resist horny yenta "Blanche Horowitz," who inevitably elicits puzzled gasps from victims as she provides obscene translations for old Yiddish phrases?
But if you're laughing so hard that you find yourself in a minor fender-bender (as has been rumored to happen), don't call us. Call Clarissa Jenkins, you uncircumcised monkey!
First, pack a picnic lunch with lots of cold beverages. Then suit up the kids in their swimming gear, grab the sunscreen and head for Desert Breeze Park.
Ignore the lovely lake surrounded by trees and picnic tables. Instead, head to the children's playground area. Beneath an earthen berm/overpass/observation deck are an assortment of shaded tables. This covered passageway connects a traditional playground with a "spray pad" where three dolphins and an elephant (climbing structures the rest of the year) squirt water on a cyclical timing system from May to October. Eat, chill, eat, chill -- well, you get the idea.
Repeat process as needed through mid-October.
When forward Tom Gugliotta blew out his left knee, people felt bad for him, but nobody panicked. When Rex Chapman, Penny Hardaway and Shawn Marion took turns missing long stretches of the season, fans felt frustrated, but nobody panicked.
But when All-Star point guard Jason Kidd fractured his left ankle with a month left in the regular season, your last name didn't have to be Colangelo to know that Phoenix was witnessing a total eclipse of the Suns. What other injury would send the team into such a fit of desperation that it would drag Kevin Johnson out of the retirement home for one last waltz at point guard?
That's how important Jason Kidd is to this team. With all due respect to Randy Johnson, there is no other professional athlete in this town so utterly indispensable to his team.
In 1999-2000, Kidd didn't quite match his astonishing pace of the year before, when he was probably more deserving of the league MVP award than eventual winner Karl Malone. Nonetheless, Kidd was routinely dominant, leading the league in assists (10.1 per game), finishing fifth in steals (2.0 per game), and averaging 14.3 points and 7.2 rebounds per game. And -- as always -- he was an iron man, averaging nearly 40 minutes a game.
The true measure of Kidd's greatness, though, is the way he always seems to play at a different speed from the rest of the team, tirelessly pushing the ball up the floor, driving his teammates with the urgency of a warrior who knows that he won't be mentioned in the same breath with his idol, Magic Johnson, until he starts putting championship rings on his fingers.
But, competitive as these franchises are, they don't tend to rise to the occasion in the postseason. You'd have to go back to the glory days of Charles Barkley to find the last time either the Suns or Coyotes were more than TV spectators once the second round of playoff action commenced.
Last year, in their maiden trip to the playoffs, the Arizona Diamondbacks were similarly shown the door in the first round. But, that disappointment aside, this team has shattered baseball precedent by stepping to the top
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