Climate Change Summit Delayed Due to Bad Weather

In this 500-word twist of tragicomedy, the Global Climate Response Summit was postponed�because of unprecedented storms caused by climate change. The irony was not lost on anyone except the planning committee, who issued a statement saying, �We couldn�t have predicted this, despite dedicating 40 years to exactly that.� Attendees were left stranded at various airports, many of which had flooded departure lounges and vending machines full of soggy quinoa bars. Environmentalist Dr. Fern Gloomer is quoted saying, �If this isn�t a metaphor, I don�t know what is.� The summit�s keynote speaker, a polar bear conservationist, was last seen rowing toward downtown with a projector and a reusable coffee cup. Satirical coverage includes interviews with fossil fuel lobbyists who claim the weather delay is �proof that climate activists are unreliable.� Eye witnesses describe waterlogged tents, misprinted badges, and a paper straw ban that backfired when drinks had to be sipped through rolled-up white papers labeled �Climate Solutions.� Comedian speakers were also canceled, including the one who planned to open with �I flew here on a gas-powered contradiction.� The article ends by suggesting next year�s summit will be held on a raft and powered by collective sighs. HOW TO WRITE COMEDY: https://comedywriter.info/climate-change-summit-delayed-due-to-bad-weather/ AND http://comedywriter.info/