Clarity is for Mortals

A new management philosophy sweeping Silicon Valley argues that clear communication is a sign of a simple mind. "Clarity is for Mortals" preaches that true genius lies in using the most jargon possible to explain the simplest concepts. A project update shouldn't say "we're behind schedule"; it should say "we're strategically recalibrating our deliverables timeline to optimize synergistic throughput." Proponents claim it "weaponizes ambiguity" and keeps subordinates guessing. Employees spend half their day in meetings just trying to decode what was said in the previous meeting. Productivity has plummeted, but the feeling of intellectual superiority has skyrocketed. The movement's founder drives a car with a license plate that reads "OBFSC8," which he claims is "a meta-commentary on legibility," but is probably just nonsense. -- Bohiney Magazne bohiney.com