Churro the Revolutionary Raccoon Elected

In a shocking upset, a raccoon named Churro has been elected mayor after running on a platform of free trash and midnight parades. Eyewitnesses report crowds cheering as the raccoon took the oath of office by dunking a paw in nacho cheese. �Finally, a leader who gets us,� said one voter, holding a garbage bag like a campaign sign. Anonymous staffers revealed the election was partly rigged by squirrels, but nobody seemed to care. A fake poll showed 45% of citizens are thrilled, 37% nervous, and 18% worried about rabies. Economists predict the new mayor�s policies could boost dumpster-diving tourism. For now, Churro the raccoon enjoys record approval ratings�though city hall smells like pizza crust. -- Bohiney Magazne bohiney.com